Dearest_Mommy

Dearest Mommy,

I know you have always been there for me as I grew from a small baby up to the big big girl that I am now. I know that you have always been worried for me and felt that I should always be under your wings as you shelter me from the evils of the world. You and daddy have never failed to provide me with a loving shelter, away from the pandora boxes in the world. Both of you brought me up to be a girl with moral values and principles, to firmly stand by my rights if I feel that injustice has been dealt, to be little Miss Innocent. I love it when you pamper me with books and sumptious food. Both of you being successful and respected, have kept me away from this dog-eat-dog world for as long as you could. But, I have grown up.

I grew up from a demure little girl, to one who have realised the cruelties in thie world. To have been ignored and betrayed by so-called friends, to realise that hyporcisy is the rule of the game and that the entire world plays by the law of the jungle-- the survival of the fittest, is indeed heart-wrenching. It is a far cry from what you have provided and carved out for me. All my life, I have been in prestigious schools and have always thought that I have seen the world for myself. I thought highly of myself, someone to be experienced as the people around me seemed never to be scheming and cunning.

When I moved to high school, the world became even nastier. Hyprocrites, posers etc, you name it I have seen them around. Though not at close contact, but visible to me thoroughly naked eye. In the beginnning, because of your and daddy's protection, I refuse to believe that this is the world that I am seeing-- this is definitely not the world that I envisioned. Goodness! Where is all the goodness in the world! Rumors spread about me, "love falls, friendship cools off" (Lear) and my world seemed to fall apart bit by bit.

Friends warned me about the world, I turned a deaf ear to their pleas. I experienced it and I realised that they were right about the cold, unforgiving world. Even teachers were out more for their own gains than for the welfare of the student body. Mommy, I made friends who helped me, but there were also friends who turned traitors.At one time, I hated you and daddy so much for lying to me about the world and shutting my eyes from the malevolence in the world. But it did come to me that you were just doing your part as a parent. And that was the period when I totally immersed myself within my books. The textbooks and novels which you have introduced to me since I was a child seemed to be my only support, my only means of keeping sane in this world. I vented all anger on them by furiously absorbing them, hoping to devoid them of all the words imprinted on the page.
Admittedly, I lost myself within books and more books. They became my only solace and only companion. So much so that my temper became so hot and fiery and I lost the human touch and the need to communicate and associate socially.

One day, when I woke up, I realised that I have lost out a lot in this world. I shut myself from you and daddy, making myself another of those typical self-centered teenagers, made you angry, was more concerned about work than anything else in the world. All of a sudden, grades didnt matter anymore. U, daddy, granny etc all the way to our little doggie did. The world became my concern-- my heart went out to the human race and the little animals who have suffered at the hands of cruel Fate. I learnt how to be human again. I learnt that lessons must be taught and learnt beyond textbooks and written paper.

I want to live again and make you and daddy and everyone proud of me. Mommy, I know what I want in life now and where I want to be heading. Thank you for always being there for me, always lightening up my life with all the teasing and bantering. I will work hard at proving myself and at the same time, try to help my little sister do the same and wake up from the materialistic and never-ending chase for the degree and reputation.

Dearest Mommy, I hope you will realise that I have grown up after reading this letter and one day, I am gonna make you so proud of me.

Kai 2000