Top Ten Lists
MacGyver's Top Ten
Murdoc and Murdoc-related Top Tens
General Show Top Tens
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MacGyver Top Tens
10) Duct tape wonderful for getting lopsided trees straight in their stands.
9) Discarded computer parts make neat ornaments.
8) Christmas baking is best done by hand, (robots drop the eggs.)
7) Don't do your shopping on Christmas Eve. (Okay so that's a good hint from anybody)
6) Remember not to let Jack Dalton drink and fly.
5) Clean socks before hanging them over the fireplace.
4) Call and remind Pete to put that mistletoe up at the Phoenix Christmas party.
3) Have Swiss Army Knife and creatively discovered insulating material ready in case Santa and Reindeer get tangled in telephone wires.
2) Turn off the radio so the depressing "I'll be home for Christmas doesn't come on. Put in tape of much more upbeat "Grandma got run over by a Reindeer."
And MacGyver's number one Christmas Hint:
1) Don't invite Murdoc for the Holidays (He never can get in the Christmas spirit.)
"This Christmas stuff gets a little sappy after awhile."
- MacGyver, The Madonna
Top Ten Things MacGyver worries about
10) Pete bugging him about getting a haircut again.
9) Bean sprouts in the fridge changing color.
8) Swiss Army Knife; what is THAT attachment for?
7) Yellow truck needs new muffler.
6) Does life really exist on other planets?
5) Commitment.
4) Friends may find out what his first name is.
3) Will makeshift rewiring to get VCR timer to work hold long enough to record six Bonanza episodes while he's gone.
2) Getting a call from Jack Dalton.
And the number one thing MacGyver worries about:
1) Forgetting exactly where he lives right now.
"Typical. Just when you're getting ahead, someone changes the odds."
- MacGyver, Pegasus
MacGyver's Top Ten New Year's Resolutions
10) Stop pirating videos of classic westerns
9) Catch Murdoc this year
8) Fight for some environemental issue or other
7) Find favorite Swiss Army Knife; lost in couch
6) Label everything he packs... next time he moves
5) Return overdue library book... "A Hundred Ways To Overcome Procrastination"
4) Watch Penny Parker's latest acting effort; something about a reporter and a super hero
3) Never tell silly camel joke to Pete again
2) Take a nap and dream of being in the old west and going by the unlikely name of Nicodemus Legend
And MacGyver's number one New Year's Resolution:
1) Make a commitment
"All those women in your life and you nver learned a thing, did you?"
- Mike, The Widowmaker
MacGyver's Top Ten Thanksgiving Traditions
10) Making cranberry sauce into clever shapes
9) Keeping Pete from polishing off the relish tray
8) Authentically recreating voyage of the Mayflower
7) Dressing up like a pilgrim
6) Generously volunteering time at local homeless shelter while simultaneously foiling terrorist bombing attempt
5) Maudlin flashbacks
4) Carving the turkey with a swiss army knife
3) Skipping the Phoenix Foundation Office Party
2) Convincing Jack Dalton that turkeys can't fly
And MacGyver's number one Thanksgiving Tradition
1) Calling all his old-girlfriends
"I've died and gone to thanksgiving."
- Macgyver, The Outsiders
Murdoc and Murdoc-related Top Tens
10) "In this game we play, close doesn't count." -- Partners
9) "But I only miss once." -- The Widowmaker
8) "I am not mad; just very, very determined." -- Cleo Rocks
7) "When you look like I do, one learns to welcome the dark." -- Cleo Rocks
6) "Y'know, MacGyver, that's why you're so hard to beat. Nobody knows what you're going to do next, including you." -- Halloween Knights
5) "Sorry you have to miss the party, old boy, but you're all tied up." -- Halloween Knights
4) "Why don't you say your prayers now. That is, if you can remember any." -- Strictly Business
3) "I decided to be all that I could be." -- Obsessed
2) "It appears that the military look is in. Of course, I have more accesories."-- Obsessed
And my number one favorite Murdoc quote:
1) "If I had some duct tape, I could fix that." -- Strictly Business
"Don't worry, MacGyver, you'll see me again. Just keep looking over your shoulder."
- Murdoc, Halloween Knights
Top Ten Possible Explanations Of Why Murdoc Never Dies
10) What?! If he was really dead, how could there be sequels
9) He doesn't really exist. He's a figment of Mac's fevered imagination Murdoc episodes are only nightmare sequences. This would explain all the inconsistencies in "Partners", like how Pete and Mac really met (we know it had something to do with a camel and quicksand) and why Mac seems more like Dexter in flashback, than the smart aleck that we knew and loved at the beginning of the series
8) The Highlander Theory -- He's an immortal. You gotta decaptitate him to make it stick. (Thanks to various list folks for this theory, as I wouldn't know Highlander from a hole in the ground)
7) Good genes
6) He's been taking lessons from the great super-villains, Like the Master, Lex Luthor, Moriarty, Miguelito Loveless, Stefano DiMera Wo Fat, Lina Lamont, Negaduck, Janos Skorzeny.... and getting high marks, too
5) Pact with the devil
4) He does die... every time. Then the writers and producers of MacGyver perform an obscure arcane ceremony to bring him back
3) The Forever Knight Theory -- He's a vampire. You gotta pound a stake through his heart. (I do know Forever Knight from a hole in the ground, but if Murdoc's a vampire, he's exceedingly poor at it)
2) Clean living?
And the number one possible explanation of why Murdoc never dies:
1) It's in his contract.
"The reports of my death have been greatly exaggerated."
- Murdoc, Partners
Murdoc's Top Ten Thanksgiving Day Traditions
10) Watch Thanksgiving day parade; think up evil plots involving large BARNEY balloon.
9) Send Penny Parker a bouqet of Black Hellebore.
8) Quickly switch off football games; never violent enough.
7) Wax nostalgic about the Thanksgiving when he assassinated an unwary ambassador
6) Work on resume to send to new organization C.A.N (Carnage And Naughtiness Inc.)
5) Put fake bomb under Jack's bed. Install camera to catch his reaction
4) Buy all the stovetop stuffing at the local grocery stores, so there won't be any when desperate last minute shoppers go looking
3) Make crank call to Pete's house; tell him the DXS is willing to pay him a million dollars if he'll come back.
2) Make list of 101 creative ways to kill MacGyver (Well, he works on that everyday)
And Murdoc's number one Thanksgiving day tradition:
1) Volunteering at local homeless shelters to strangle Turkeys
"He's not your normal Professional Killer."
- MacGyver, Widowmaker
General Show Top Tens
The Chernobyl disaster could easily have been averted with a good, old fashioned, Hershey's Bar
Ink pens are the perfect diameter for splicing cut fuel lines and repairing your busted jeep.
A first name isn't necessary to be successful.
While you may not be able to conquer the world with it, a blade of grass and some sand sure do make one helluva bomb.
Women are strangely attracted to men who can diffuse nuclear weapons with a handful of paperclips and a wad of gum.
Never give a prisoner access to paper clips, thread, or broken glass.
Outside a Swiss Army Knife, Physics is your best friend.
That you can survive a fiery explosion or a plunge into oily seawater and STILL have good hair.
Guns are for the feeble and weak!
That suspension of disbelief is a powerful weapon.
Thanks to LostInSpace45 for providing this.