Welcome to the *OFFICIAL* homepage for
Crucial Agony.......a
new dark force in the underground music scene.
10/25/02 Crucial Agony on tour starting on Halloween!
News///Gallery
of Agony///Lyrics///Member
Profiles///Contact & Merchandise
Info: Crucial Agony
is based in lovely Cleveland, known for it's wholesome steel mill smog,
vast, rolling plains of seagull-poop-covered asphalt and the murky, green
lake to the north. The band formed originally under the name Woeful Existence,
but they soon changed it to Crucial Agony when group concensus found the
former name to be "too perky." While being one of the most underground
groups in the Electro/Goth/Metal/Snivel/Pop genre, this five person band
has a loyal and demented following of crazed wannabes and pathetic groupies
with no real lives. Crucial Agony is managed by Christabel Malaise--who
finds dealing with mere mortals such a waste of time on this plane of existence,
and so thusly manages them in spirit. The group's promoter is the illustrious
Mistress Mangyflower, who can be contacted for further info on such things
as booking, recordings, and overly expensive merchandise.
Crucial Agony has released an eight song EP,With Cheerful Disdain,
a remix album entitled Mangle With Care, and finally the long awaited full length
Narcoleprosy has been released and is available for purchase on the "We Are Better Than Us Tour" with ASOCKINMYDESSERT and BVD Nation.
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The band has built a decent sized fanbase in their hometown, and is constantly being booked for shows and Goth festivals. "We strive for infamy." says Bhayne (the Hoarse Whisperer). Just recently, the band was signed to the
Dark Futures label, as they had so hoped and sacrificed goats for. Crucial Agony has gained new fans through their exposure on fine radio stations like WRUW. They hope to branch out in the new millenium and bring a new,hopelessly pathetic edge to Goth music. "We'd like to thank all the little people who bought our CDs at shows. We can afford water with our Ramen noodles now." says Malady. And so, Crucial Agony continues to conquer the scene with their lovable dirges. We wish them well in their dark crusade.
- ~Mangyflower
Crucial Agony would like to thank:
DJ Evil C, The Industrial Ninja, Joanna,
Chunky B -for not stumping the paraplegic soundguy, Scorpion, Jhonen Vasquez,
that guy with the hair who wears black all the time, Chad--whose butt is
on fire with joy for us, Captain A--for keeping Gothdom pretentious, fashion
victims, all the self absorbed mirror dancers, mopers, people who like
to breathe smoke, skanky people, people who flash each other for no apparent
reason, and anyone wearing a spiky vinyl thong.
Without you, we'd all have boring corporate
jobs in beige, windowless offices, going blind and cultivating wide butts
from sitting in front of a damned screen all day, wishing we could just
end it all by puncturing our wrists with the stapler. Thanks again.
Crucial Agony buys all their clothing at
and if you were cool, you would too.
Website designed by
Mangyflower
