10. A Hair & Make-up Makeover - The "deathly white skin with shoe polish black hair" look, is SOOOOOO out this year!

9. Gianni Versace Body Bags - Even enemies should die in style!

8. Speech therapy - Meeeeeshelle & Peeeeeeeelar, need I say more?

7. A new umbilical cord, so that she can re-attach Danny & Pilar to her!

6. An interior decorator - That house could use some nice floral arrangements and some new curtains.

5. A gift certificate to "Mobsters R Us" - Your complete line of orgnized crime materials, complete with instructions for arranging a hit on your own life!

4. An inflatable "Dietz" doll!

3. A Subscrition to "Parents" Magazine - She could use a little help, don't you think?

2. Alan Spalding - After Annie Dutton, who else but Carmen could interest him!?

1. A Well-Endowed Man - This woman's gotta have more pent up frustration that a volcano that's been dormant for 200 years!

Thank Amy for the giggles!

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