I have been wearing a scarf for eight months and now, finally, have almost enough hair to go about without a covering. It is a wonderful feeling and so yesterday I treated myself to a creambath. This is like a head and shoulder massage. The hair is washed and then massaged with something like aloe vera or avocado. It was a heavenly experience and well worth the long wait.

Today I was obviously still in the mood for pampering and set out for a pedicure at my favourite place, Toko You. Can you imagine my surprise when I found the door was locked? Someone seated nearby said that they had closed down. It is funny how there is always someone sitting about in Indonesia who can tell you what is going on. I will now endeavour to find a replacement place. A little decadence now and then isn't a bad thing. Besides I can barely afford these treats in Australia.

Yesterday I read an interesting story in the Pikiran Rakyat about a man, the father of twelve children, who used black magic to help women find husbands. His methods bordered on intimacy and this had brought about his downfall. Apparently some customers who had failed to find a husband complained to the police. Prior to the recent complaints he had been working unchallenged for years. Prostitutes and pimps were among his best customers! The story threw up more questions than it answered!

Wednesday 24th

This morning the call to prayer awoke me at four as usual. We live only meters away from a mosque and it is a rare day that I sleep through. This time, though, Yana suggested that we wake up and pray. I followed him as best I could. The rituals are quite complex and there is a lot that has to be said. I have a great deal to learn. I can't even get up and down gracefully. I nearly trip myself up each time. I then went back to sleep.

Yana told me that his mother goes to market after praying and then comes back home to cook food for the family. Fortunately, he was not suggesting that I follow her example, but was just explaining how hard she works and has always worked. This amazing lady brought up her three children all by herself after her husband left her.

A ship with refugees has sunk near the Indonesian coast with over 300 people drowning. I was very upset. These people had hoped for a better life. No, they had just hoped for a normal life. Now they can't even have that. I hope that there are some people in Australia who are similarly affected by this tragedy. Something does need to be done about the problem. Compassion and a real examination of the issue is needed.

Tuesday 23rd

Afghanistan claims that it has knocked down two helicopters and the Americans deny it. Who do we believe? The confusion continues. If only America would suddenly think that now it is all enough. Unfortunately they won't. Both sides will keep going. Stubborness is a frightening thing. I wish Bush would go on a hunger strike for 30 days. A Ghandi type action would impress the world more that aggresssion. Surely!

After thousands of years of civilisation people still can't get on, whether it is at the village level, town level or country level. In a couple of villages in West Java the inhabitants are in such a state of conflict that molotov cocktails are being hurled at each other. Two people were even killed.

Monday 22nd

I entered Islam today. I had been preparing for a few days and we felt that the time was right. It was actually a very emotional experience and I was surprised to find myself so affected. I was also pleased that the man who spoke with us at the religious office talked to us in some depth. I didn't want it to be something that was over in two minutes. It wouldn't have seemed right. Yana and I then plan to get married on the 5th of November.

It was much later in the day before I could get to the internet cafe to update this page. As luck would have it the connection was so slow that I needed an hour just to open my hotmail. In the end I had to put the update off for the day. It just wasn't going to happen. It taught me a lesson. A few days ago I had been upset because there was so little mail and my web page had had few visitors but I soon realised that this was better than not being able to access any of it at all. I always start to take things for granted. I should be much happier with what I have got.

Yesterday we were housebound for hours because of heavy rain. We watched movie after movie until we had had more than enough. All the films very American and very violent. I can understand why people take exception to this sort of stuff. Human life seems to be taken so lightly.

Sunday 21st

I am becoming a very regular customer at the chicken porridge cart most mornings. Shopping is something I do inconsistently and there is often very little to eat apart from fruit. Not that I don't like fruit, because I do, but I also fancy a bit more. I quite like the porridge which is a rice mixture cooked to a pulp with a sprinkling of chicken, kecap manis and roasted peanuts. It is a social occasion waiting for your porridge. People come with their bowls and we are all served in turn. I love sitting outside the little shop and watching the area come alive. What is even better is that it all happens only metres from my house.

Speaking of food,I am also enjoying the present arrangement with Bu Empon, whereby the evening meal arrives at our door around six o'clock. The food is freshly cooked and very tasty. I was getting tired of eating out. The food doesn't always taste nice and my own attempts at cooking were not well received by Yana. He likes a lot of spices in his food. Apparently my dishes are too bland. I, according to him, also mix vegetables that shouldn't be mixed. In Indonesian cooking there seem to be strict rules that I am totally ignorant of!! Silly me.

I won't report on any newspaper articles today because there were none that really caught my attention. Sometimes there seems to just be stuff to fill up the pages. An editor's job can't be easy.

Saturday 20th

So John Howard was upset about Megawati's speech the other day! He felt that her comments could cause instability in the Asia Pacific area. Megawati had simply said that she would support a fight against terrorism, but would not suport a fight against another country. Her comments were fair enough. Is Howard suffering from delusions of grandeur? I know Tony Blair is, because he seems to be strutting across the world stage as though he is one of the major players.

The major things of interest in the papers tend to be 'little stories'. A reporter from the Pikiran Rakyat was sent out to gauge the public's views on Osama. He met some prostitutes and discovered to his amazement that although they recognized Osama's name and face they didn't whether he was Japanese, Indonesian or whatever. They were also unfamiliar with the public role he is playing at present.

I had to laugh when I read that a group of blind people in Bandung were pledging their support for Afghanistan. Fortunately they are not sending themselves. Imagine the results. If sighted people bomb strategic places such as Red Cross stores then what could we expect from blind people?

Another local Bandung story which tickled my fancy involved a couple of university students who had made a private video of themselves making love. Without their knowledge, or so they say anyhow, copies were made by the people that rented out the cam recorder. As ill luck would have it the father of the boy was watching a blue movie when he recognized his son!! The law courts are presently trying to make sense of the situation while the involved parties plus their families are contending with a high level of embarassment. I for one, am curious as to whether there really are people around who would want a video of their lovemaking. It would be the last thing I would want to watch!

Apart from reading more papers I am anticipating a quiet weekend. It will probably be a social one where I will relax and catch up with friends.

Friday 19th

The rainy season is making it hard to fulfil the few commitments that I have. I set out yesterday afternoon and of course within minutes it was pouring. I mean really pouring. I sheltered and tried to hail a taxi. One did eventually stop and took me to the bottom of the hill but no further. He said there were too many traffic jams in that part of the city! I then had to resort to public transport and was somewhat late.

So Australia has sent some troops to Afghanistan. I wonder if that will affect my presence here. I may have to tell those that ask where I am from that I am from Holland. I mean it isn't really a lie. My parents are Dutch and so my blood would have to be Dutch.

The newspapers had a wide range of stories. I was interested to hear that the house speaker and leader of the Golkar party, Akgar Tanjung has 'forgotten' where he placed 40 odd billion rupiah! Should such a forgetful person have the responsibility of handling large sums of money?

Somewhere near Sukabumi local people took justice into their hands recently. A passenger had taken an 'ojek' ride (bike taxi) to a fairly remote village and then at knifepoint had taken the bike. Unfortunately for him he had been seen and the local police had been notified. He was then taken into custody by the police who later briefly released him into the hands of a group of ojek riders so that he could identify his partners in the crime.The ojek riders, and apparently there were many of them, then burnt him. Not a pleasant story but fairly typical of what sometimes happens to criminals in this country. It actually amazes me that there are any criminals at all.

Thursday 18th

Another grey day. Apparently the rainy season throws the traffic in cities in Indonesia into chaos. Commuters in Jakarta took more than four hours to get home the other evening!

The lady who helps me in the house has not been well for weeks. Her symptoms closely resembled what I was experiencing before my cancer was diagnosed. She had gone to a variety of doctors but nothing definite was said. I became very concerned and eventually gave her some money to go to a good doctor in a good hospital. Today she told me that she did have cancer and would only live for a few more years. She was obviously very upset. It is a real shock to be given such bad news. She is particularly concerned about what will happen to her adopted daughter. Bu Empon, as she is called, couldn't have children of her own so her first two husbands divorced her. With her third husband she adopted a girl who is now 17. The daughter would like to go to university and her mother has been coming up with all sorts of moneyraising schemes to help prepare for this eventuality. Bu Empon is now worried that her daughter will not have this opportunity if she dies. She believes that her husband will probably remarry and the interests of the step daughter may not be attended to. It is a difficult situation and I am not in a position to help. I could only try to encourage her to be positive and to continue with all her plans and schemes.

The papers were fairly uninteresting. The Pikiran Rakyat,which I enjoy because it is a people's newspaper, not really intellectual or highbrow, did have something amusing on the front page. Apparently a lecturer at ITB, a major university here in Bandung, was unable to concentrate on his prayers yesterday at the local mosqque because two young men were wearing t-shirts with 'I love Osama' written on them. The lecturer said that he is also an Osama admirer but still felt that the shirts were not appropriate attire. Leading on from this the paper mentioned that sales of such t-shirts and other such memorablia had skyrocketed recently. Osama is obviously a very marketable commodity these days!

Living in a muslim country like Indonesia is interesting because one is presented with a different political atmosphere. The media has a different focus. Someone who is presented as a villain and terrorist in western newspapers can be written about in positive terms in Muslim countries.It makes one realise how much the media shapes and manipulates our thoughts.

Wednesday 17th

While going home by bike yesterday, Yana and I got completely wet through. The rainy season was showing its full potential. One thing I did notice though is that you certainly feel alive when you are cold, wet and shivering. However, you feel even better when you are home and dressed in nice warm, dry clothes. Later in the evening we watched an Indonesian film called Pramusuwari .... or a name to that effect. It was very Indonesian in setting and told the story about an indealistic teacher's attempts to stop her students' involvement in the world of prostitution. The whole economy of the village came to a halt as so many people were directly and indirectly affected when the prostitution was closed. The villagers were obviously very angry and they made the teacher's life almost impossible. It was a very moving film and focussed on something a little bit more substantial than the superficiality films often focus on these days.

The papers still focus on the US/Afghanistan conflict. One Muslim intellectual very wisely said that the present US approach will simply produce more Osamas. If you want to stop terrorism then you have to focus on the concept and not fight against people. The cause of terrorism needs to be questioned as well. There are obviously many people whose needs are not being met. The Pikiran Rakyat stated in a positive manner that Afghanistan was too strong to be beaten by air attack.

I was rather interested in some articles that reported problems within Indonesia. There is enough going on here that deserves time and attention. Apparently in Aceh the security forces spend a great deal of their time demanding many from motorists at checkpoints. The income of many truck drivers has more than halved as a result. Some have even given up working as it was no longer worth their while. Meanwhile in Indramayu and Subang(West Java) more than US$200,000 in foreign aid money has been embezzled by local officials! No wonder that malnutrition is rife. The money just isn't trickling down. There are now 47 million poor people in Indonesia and their diet is often totally inadequate. A large proportion of children under 2 are affected with anemia which can eventually reduce physical and mental capacity. A 'lost generation' could be developing in front of our eyes.

The news that made me see red was from Australia. Beazley announced that if he was elected he would spend AS$10 million over four years on building an infrastructure against people smuggling! This money could actually be employed resettling and re-establishing these people. They do leave their country for a very definite reason. Australia's attitudes are quite frightening. Such arrogance and selfishness. I am ashamed to be Australian.

Tuesday 16th

I started the day with a visit to the local market. So we now have lots of fresh fruit and vegetables, it is nice to be fully stocked again. Then I went to give a young 12 year old Indonesian lass some help with her English. Chacha is delightful. During the course of our time together I looked at her English school textbook and was not impressed. There were so many mistakes. I had often wondered why so many Indonesians have problems with 'ing' words. Now I believe that they have been taught to use them incorrectly. I will try to contact the authors or publishers and see what can be done.

I had great plans for revamping my web page today but was horrified to see that my favourite internet cafe had removed Microsoft Front Page from their programs. They were the only place that had the program! I asked if it could be restored and hope that that they will be able to do so soon. Meanwhile I will have to continue editing directly from the html page. This is OK for the simple stuff but I had big ideas that are beyond my capabilities. So I will have to wait.

Today's papers focus on the disturbance outside the Parliament building in Jakarta. The FPI were told by the police that demonstrating on a religious holiday was illegal. Negotiations took place but seemed to achieve little so the police took out the water cannon. This then lead to a full confrontation in which tens of FPI people were hurt and some cars were damaged. Talking about the police, I recently read with interest something about the police who guard the embassy and such locations. They actually camp out on the spot for days on end. They sleep, eat and wash locally. I can't imagine Australian police doing that!! Twenty-four hours on the job.

Both the Jakarta Post and the Pikiran Rakyat countered comments that the Taliban was disintegrating. The Indonesian newspaper also printed a letter that was supposedly written by Osama bin Laden to a person in Bandung. This letter was a reponse to a letter written to him. It showed a very normal and humourous Osama. He said that he was still enjoying cups of tea and sunsets. Apparently, he added, the collectors of scrap metal in Afghanistan were having a field day collecting metal from bombs and such. The letter also joked that the Americans were much too serious!!! I don't know what to think. The Pikiran Rakyat is not very reliable and do make up things. Last week they published a photo of a person standing on the the top of the WTC with a plane approaching the building in the background. Later it was acknowledged as being a fake. I had had my suspicions. As for this letter .... crashing into buildings and killing many doesn't strike me as funny! I will wait and see what eventuates.

Monday 15th

Today is a holiday, Mohammad's Ascension day, so there were no newspapers. I was forced to rereread yesterday's. I did however find an interesting article in the Pikiran Rakyat about Osama bin Laden. Ghitani, an Egyptian writer, said that indirectly, America was causing his rise in popularity. If he was killed, he could reach the status of a super hero. He was now like a contemporary Che Guevara. People were impressed that he was prepared to devote his wealth to the Islamic cause. He could squander his wealth on luxuries and frivolities but instead he choses to live a life of hiding and hardship.

Yana is away with his mates on a long motorbike trip. I have fallen off too many times and so didn't join him. Besides they like to go offroad and I have a strong preference for firm ground under my wheels. He should be back tonight but meanwhile I am using his absence to good advantage. I will continue with the painting. It is a very soothing occupation. Yesterday as a reward for my good painting efforts I went off to Sunday drinks in the evening. A group of people, mostly teachers, but not all, meet each Sunday in each other's homes for a few hours. Warren, a Canadian minister, is also a regular. He helped me last year when I had a low spot. He is an admirable fellow and will help anyone whether they are in his congregation or not. His presence here in Indonesia at present could be considered inadvisable but he has chosen to stay on. He wants to set a good example and feels that it would be an act of cowardice to leave. You meet such amazing people here in Indonesia!

Sunday 14th

I woke very early and really got stuck into the newspapers. The Jakarta Post focuses on lifestyle and magazine type articles on Sundays so there wasn't a lot of news. There was, however, a very interesting article that explained the basics of Islam in a clear manner. It was a good start to trying to bridge the everwidening gap between religions.

The Pikiran Rakyat continued its usual aggressive approach. It stated in a main article that many Americans are now feeling very unsafe as the threat of anthrax or some other form of biological warfare emerges. Hamzah Haz's comments as leader of the PPP were also on the front page. He quite unequivocally asked America to stop their attacks. He also asked the Muslims of Indonesia to unite and offer humanitarian assistance. His views are starting to stray from the official line of the government. The rift between Megawati and Hamzah Haz, in his other role as vice president, is showing. I worry that further political instability will result and Indonesia will suffer even further. Why can't the leaders of this country work together and think of the country and its people and not be obsessed by their own agendas?

Further into the paper were two stories that showed the involvement of locals in the present situation. A group of volunteers had raised 10 million rupiah by collecting donations. This money would go towards the purchase of food and medicine. In Geger Kalong, a group of artists with a political bent, were running a 50 hour non stop program of poetry, dance, songs and traditional activities in their attempt to bring people's attention to the concept of 'terrorism'.

The article that really caught my attention was a dialogue that read as a piece of drama between two supposedly fictitious figures. One of the two wanted to volunteer for the jihad in Afghanistan. He was told by the other that he couldn't go because the quota of 20 had already been filled and their money was finished. The one continued to express his enthusiasm. The other said that he understand the frustration that he must feel as an unemployed person but running overseas wasn't always the best solution. He then went on to say that if the volunteer had some money then he could actually do some good here in Bandung. There are thousands of poor and needy people on his own doorstep who are in desperate need of help. The dialogue ended with the volunteer saying that he still wanted to go on thie jihad as he felt that the rewards would be bigger. Presumably he was talking of spiritual rewards but this was not clear. All in all, it was an interesting examination of the present manifestation of enthusiasm to join the jihad, that has emerged in the country. It was nice to see that the newspaper was prepared to present a softer viewpoint at times. In fact further in th middle of the paper,lost among lesser issues was a report on the speech given by Amad Tirtosudiro, leader of DPA, in a seminar at a university in Bandung yesterday. This person also stressed that Indonesians should focus on their own country first. Their well being at home should not be sacrificed.

So with my mind full of an appreciation of the immensity of the problems facing Indonesia and the rest of the world I will try to go home shortly and concentrate on lesser matters, such as painting the dining room. It is a lovely day and every one I have met seems friendly and relaxed. As the Jakarta post asked, "would you rather be of Arab descent and living in New York,London or Sydney or an expat living in Jakarta? The latter is obviously much more palatable."

Saturday 13th

I am going to visit an Australian friend shortly. I suggested that we meet somewhere for lunch but she was horrified at the thought of venturing out. She said that she had been lying low all week. She was amazed that I had used public transport and had been getting about as usual. Apparently, there aremany stories circulating about people who have been harassed. I may have to alter my approach after hearing about these incidents. Meanwhile I feel fine and quite comfortable.

Last night on television I noticed that there had been quite a large demonstration at the Gedung Sate, a Bandung building that is featured on many postcards. The demonstration looked quite lively and it would probably be a place to avoid for the next few days.

The Pikiran Rakyat newspaper continues with their anti American tirade. The Jakarta Post, on the other hand,?has been focusing on reports of threats to foreigners and the moves that have been made to ensure their safety. This is an issue that is obviously of great concern to expats. I did have to laugh about an article in which President Bush was astounded at the depth of the anti American feeling. He was quoting as saying that 'we are good' and was unable to appreciate that some people might not realise this. Such naivety.

I went out last night to a backpacker's hotel called By Moritz to catch up with an old friend. When I say old, I mean it in two senses. He is a 78 year old Norwegian surgeon who comes alone to holiday in Indonesia every year. We have met for a good long talk every year for the last four years. He left Norway on Wednesday and so was well and truly aware of the possible risk he was taking. He said at his age he wasn't concerned with such trivialities. He is now sporting a walking stick as he has hip problems but was still energetic and dapper. We talked about life, death, sickness, the present instability and Indonesia. A very charming and independent character.

I also noticed that there were quite a few other tourists in the hotel?and so was pleased to see that some people were not prepared to put their holiday plans aside. The newspapers report that the drop in occupancy of most major hotels has been quite profound. Backpackers are obviously a tougher customer.

Apart from all this life in paradise is still wonderful.

Friday October 12th.

I don't know whether it is my imagination or not but everybody seemed more friendly today. Everywhere I went people were smiling. A few days before I had felt distinctly uncomfortable. Yana thought that it was probably in my mind. I am not so sure.

Perhaps people are over the initial shock of the American attack. Perhaps only the fanatics want to pursue the issue ad nauseum. I hope this is the case because I want to be here in Indonesia and stay here. It is paradise.

At 7:30 I headed off to my early morning conversation commitment. It was a magic morning, with blue skies and sunshine. I mention this because of late it has been grey and overcast. Amy, an American and a teacher at the International School drove past me and?gave me a lift. I asked her how she was coping with all the Anti American press. She said her feelings varied from day to day. Yesterday she had felt positive but today she felt a little less uncertain. She couldn't put her finger on why.

The local Indonesian newspaper, the Pikiran Rakyat, has a very anti American viewpoint. I get quite concerned when I read its strong pro Muslim slant. A Chinese man had told me that the newspapers were paid to support a particular point of view. I don't know whether this is true or not. None the less if the average reader believes what they read in this paper we could end up with some very staunch Taliban supporters. It even said in one commentary that more people had been killed in Afghanistan than in the world trade centre crashes. This was news to me although I haven't heard it substantiated elsewhere. They also focus on the David and Goliath scenario, constantly reminding the reader that the Americans have sophisticated machinery whereas the Taliban don't. The plight of the poor average Afghani is also repeatedly reported. I agree for these people?haven't had a fair go for years. Still I can see how the feelings of the reader are being strongly manipulated.

In the Jakarta Post there was a comment from an Afghani who lives in Indonesia. He said he was astounded at the support for the Taliban in Indonesia. He then went on to say that he had left Afghanistan because of the harshness of of the regime over the last few years. It had not been a pleasant or safe place, by any stretch of the imagination. An interesting point.

As for me I am going to have a low key day. There are more papers to read and tv programs to watch. I may even do some more painting. Instead of the bland Indonesian white interior we are introducing a nice terracotta. It gives such a different feel.