Witchery

A friend recommended this flick if I wanted to see a bad horror movie, and boy, he has no compassion!! "Witchery" is BAD. I have a feeling David Hasselhoff has blocked this travesty out of his memory, and doesn't list it on his resume.

The premise (I think) is that a witch has lured this bunch of people to (of all things) an "abandoned" island hotel. She then kills each one to fulfill a certain part of some ancient Satanic ritual. Finally, a pregnant Linda Blair saves the day, after David, who you think would be the hero from all his future work (like Knight Rider and Baywatch), gets impaled on a candlestick.

If you actually find this movie somewhere in a backwoods video store in coyote country, fast forward through the entire first hour, because it is too slow and pointless to watch.

The only thing that makes this movie at all bearable, and only barely, are a couple of cool torturings and killings. Watch for the chimney scene, and how the slut and her lover get killed.

I would recommend Pieces over this crap, even though Rob-Dogg warns you away from that movie.

For more information from the Internet Movie Database:
Witchery a.k.a. La Casa 4 a.k.a. Witchcraft
Don't ask me about the names, I have no clue. This movie is NOT to be confused with Witchcraft, the crapfest that was the first of about 300 crappy sequels.