Learned

I'VE LEARNED.....

This is a listing of some of the things that I or my friends have learned while in this great experience called college. My friend Liz, and a few others have helped me comprise this list. They are in no particular order. But this is our life!

1)If you pay money, the English majors will write your papers.
2)You cannot get completely trashed and then try to converse with your ex, or anyone for that matter.
3)Do not order black-cherry slushes from Burger King if you plan on talking to or seeing anyone. We also believe they have something in it, for it alters our behavior.
4)That Wal-mart is the coolest place in the world.
5)That every guy has a "Curve" box.
6)A bottle of "the purple stuff" should be on top of every girls dresser. It's the secret weapon!
7)That every girl should have a 'Dragon'.
8)More than I ever wanted to about Thomas's sex life.
9)That people can be Christmas presents too.
10)That I have a little woman locked in my glove compartment and Liz cannot get her out, and she's gonna scream "I'm fragile" one of these days
11)That sometimes the answer to problems is to just give up, they get sorted out on their own that way, or forgotten.
12)A song, a smell, and a place can bring you back to a past you thought you'd forgotten.
13)Waking up in someone’s arms is the best feeling in the world
14)That students will walk in cold and snow for beer and food, yet refuse to go to class in the same weather
15) College students are very self sufficient, after all that’s why God gave us plasma.
16)That there is something seriously wrong with the 12th floor in TTE and should just remove it in order to stop the madness.
17)The organization of Gullickson Hall and the Henderson Center is mind boggling, and the asbestos is just very scary.
18) All the good guys have girlfriends, and those who don't- have a boyfriend.
19)The need to change the scenery happens quite often, in which case we get the hell out and don't tell anyone where we went.
20) Not to let a drunk guy who's never mixed drinks before, even sober, to mix you one without watching him.
21) Frats and Sororities just suck- nothing else to say.
22) Nothing is more fun than being drunk, eating, and playing the vintage Nintendo at 4 am with your girls.
23) No matter how much it seems like a person went through the same thing you did, you can't tell them what to do or convince them of something they don't believe or feel.
24) That one person can be everything to you, and the person who tells you that someone can't- hasn't found the one who was everything to them.
25)Friends from high school and friends from college are 2 different worlds. And I am constantly reminded of that when I see them.
26) Hooker boots and whore boots (2 different things) need to be in every respectable girls closet.
27)Burger King, Taco Bell, Happy Dragon, Fazolis, Papa Johns, and Chic-fil-a are all very important to a college students diet.
28)Apartment 404 is more than just beer, guys, underwear on the walls, wrestling and sex- there is a sense of brothership there.
29) My old roommate can revert to sounding 10 years old again after drinking too much.
30) LIFE GOES ON!
31)That I have a carbon copy with the same name, we look alike, talk alike, and have way more in common than is normal- I think we were separated at birth.
32)Chad wants to make out with me.
33) Walks at 1 am to the river are the best.
34)That the night before your wedding, your future husband better be sober and quiet when he comes home from his bachelors party, or else he'll be standing outside his bedroom door whining, "let me in honey."
35)If you have a nice Mercedes Bendz just sitting on the street, it might be covered in pop the next morning.
36)The past always seems to come back to haunt you in one way or another, and it is clashing with my future!
37)That we all just have too much DRAMA in our lives, why aren't we getting paid millions to act it out??
38)If 2 guys want to know what kind of underwear you're wearing, just let them know or else you will be molested in the card aisle of Krogers
39)If a guy who is interested in you is any way involved in the military or rotc or civil air patrol.....run....run far, far away.
40)This whole one 12th floor boy per girl isn't a good idea...just don't get involved and warn all the others
41) I will most likely die of lung cancer- funny I've never directly smoked a cigarette in my entire life.
42)Chad doesn't understand the term "PG-13."
43)That Mexicans find newer and better ways to cross state borders every day.
44)That not everyone should attempt the barn dance.
45) That if I try to lock myself away in an attempt to stay away from guys, that one would just find a way to pick the lock.....
46) That a mysterious portal opens once every millenium, for 20 seconds...pay attention and you'll understand how that universe operates...miss something and you are screwed!
47) That nothing is a mistake, to regret nothing, everything that comes to me, and that happens is an opportunity.
48) That history can be *felt* when spending time with someone you haven't seen in forever.
49) That we live in the equivalent of the 'Real World'.
50) An ex can basically molest you on the streets of DC and not many eyebrows will be raised.
51) That true love doesn't just disappear, it lasts in one form or another forever.
52) That some guys don't just 'look at the menu,' they skip the ordering and just go straight to the kitchen.
53) That a Rubix cube is so simple but yet it's so mind boggling!
54) That the lifeguards at Marshall University really will save your life, but only after they stare at the drowning people for a few seconds to see if they are faking or not.
55) That there are just going to be some people in your life that you are going to remember forever, and then there are those that just seem to drift out of your memory.
56) That we finally figured out where all the people are running from! They are running from all of the dirty vermin!!
57) That you can say shithead with the Vocalizer 3000 from Walmart.
58) That I DO have the power in certain situations, but I'm too nice to use it!
59) That a guy can say that he will do anything including die for you, but he won't call when you ask him to! more of emilys drunken logic
60)That what goes around always comes around.
61) Plan A always starts with the 1st question- straight or gay?
62) That there is the evergoing inevitable question of how can a girl like THAT get a guy like THAT??
63) G-d says NO!!!
64) That me and Soma have an uncanny ability to fit into small places....like the dryer!!
65) A girl can never have too many Matt's
66) Me and Liz keep somehow making enemies with girls we've never even met
67) That some guys will never underestimate the level of bitchiness that I can reach ever again.
68) How many college students does it take to get a frisbee out of a tree? 8 we've discovered
69) I can't moonwalk when I'm drunk
70) Guys will try to conquer the girls dorm, floor by floor starting with 14!.
71) That I've learned too much in college
72) College is the best years of your life!
73) I suck at padiddle, and will be naked in the afterlife!
74) There are just going to be some people in your life that you really aren't going to care about, nor want in your presence
75) That you cant really change anyone, and you shouldnt try to either
76) That I'm not as chicken shit as I thought- I jumped off a 30 foot cliff!
77) Wal-mart is the root of all evil...accidents occur too often there
78) Nathaniel Hawthorne has become my worst enemy
79) A man in uniform will ALWAYS look better than a man without
80) Liz finally figured out what a chigger is, and has pics to prove it
81)I was told that I have a love/hate relationship with my ex, and it all depends on what mood we're both in
82) That 3 shots of liquid cocaine will get me completely obliterated within 15 minutes! :)
83) That I can fall asleep anywhere, anytime and in any position.
84) That some people mature faster than others, and it breaks your heart to see those who you used to love and hang out with, and know you cant hang out with them because they drive you crazy with immaturity.
85)That seconds do matter, in every situation and you should cherish your time here and with the people you love.
86) That some people just don't change, no matter how much you thought they did, and you just have to let that be.
87) You forgive but never really forget.
88) You've gotta trust your gut
89) They don't really explain radiology school in the little brochure they give you.
90) Circumstances in life happen, and sometimes it's never anyones fault, they just happen.
91) You'll find out what true friends are when you really need them.
92) You'll sometimes meet people that completely change your opinion of something.
93) You can't always trust men, not even your own father.
94) Everyone should have a theme song.
95) You can call the teacher 'Satan' and get up and walk out of a class, and it really isn't that big of a deal.
96) You can listen to a song, and have a special meaning with it, only to later put it with the same situation and get a totally different meaning out of it.
97) I will never take advantage of the right to choose my own shoes, have a vacation longer than a week, or the knowledge that sometimes it's better to be naive.
98) Once you've been in some sort of medical setting or radiology school you no longer speak in regular terms, and you have your own language.
99) That it's possible to know on a Monday that you're going to need to get drunk that Friday.
100) There are some parts of WV that people come from that they may as well have just come from another planet.

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