"Um, just something we thought you might need." Kendra and Chelsea giggled to each other, apparently trying not to burst out laughing. She opened the box and stood there aghast, blushing crimson.
She'd been planning another night in. Her roommates were always on her case about not coming out with them, but she rarely felt like it. The prospect of study, surfing the net or watching a late movie was more alluring than alcohol, crowds and sweat. Kendra and Chelsea were dressed to the nines and standing in the doorway, about to head to the city. They had giggled to each other then apologised, explaining that their gift was intended to shame her out of the apartment. Almost rendered speechless, Elaine forced a good-natured laugh before wishing them a good night and quietly locking the door behind them. Her knees were shaking so badly she had to sit down. In minutes she was calm enough to giggle self-consciously.
Along with a dose of humiliation and thumping adrenaline, her roommates had given her a vibrator. Though it appeared to have been given in jest, she had never felt more embarrassed than when she stood there with her mouth open and cheeks burning, an empty box in one hand and a sex toy in the other.
Turning the toy over in her hands at the kitchen table, she checked it out. It was nice and smooth and had a simple on/off switch and three different speeds. She'd always wanted a vibrator. She would never have had the courage to actually purchase one, so the realisation that she now owned one made her tummy flip. She slipped it into her bedside drawer, and went to study as planned. Before long it was late and she went to bed, sleeping fitfully.
Three days of denial followed, with her roommates teasing her at every opportunity. They latched onto the admission that she 'hadn't tried it yet, ' and they wouldn't let her forget about it. It wasn't that she didn't want to, but it scared her. She'd never used anything but her fingers, and even then it was only rarely.
Her roommates insisted it felt 'unbelievable, ' but Elaine wasn't so sure. She'd heard people could become addicted to vibrators or turned into some kind of a sex maniac. Being out of control was one of her greatest fears. It was the only thing she really didn't like about this whole sex business. When she had an orgasm, she had to grit her teeth and concentrate very hard, just to maintain her composure. If it slipped at all she would buck around uncontrollably and say all kinds of things she didn't mean. Lately she'd taken to pressing her face into her pillow, even biting it hard.
Masturbating with her roommates at home, even if they were asleep, was out of the question. There was no way she was going to risk waking anyone. She had heard some girls described as 'screamers' and they were often called 'sluts' in the same breath. Her father had left her mother for one of them. She didn't want to be one of them. She wasn't one of them. She was a good girl. That's what her mother said.
"You're a good girl, Elaine." Meaning, "I never caught you masturbating and I'm pretty sure you still have your virginity." She was right too. Until she'd arrived at college, Elaine had rarely masturbated, and certainly never to orgasm. The two dates she'd endured in high school had been disasters. Her mother chaperoned the first one, even going so far as telling the young man not to put his arm around her. Elaine had insisted on a date alone with a boy soon after her seventeenth birthday, but had been so freaked by her physical response when the boy touched her thigh during the movie that she shied away from boys for fear of sexual contact. The idea of getting a reputation made her cringe. And besides, she liked being thought of as untouchable.
At college she'd grown up somewhat. She had allowed herself to discover the mind-bending pleasures her fingers could give her, even though the experience was overwhelming. That first time she would never forget. Overcome with guilt at her shocking physical response, she was convinced she had a medical condition. She read books and found she was not abnormal, just rare. Over the following months she trained herself to remain quiet and to rein in her passion. Unfortunately, orgasms thus procured were unsatisfactory, leaving her even more desperate for release. And so, as was her regular routine, she would wait until her roommates were out, before indulging herself. She was still worried about the neighbours though, even though she doubted they could hear. As for the opposite sex, the boys from high school were now college men, and she was even more reluctant to get involved with them.
She'd overheard Chelsea and Kendra talking about vibrators one time, about how good they were and how pleased they were to be able to come home to one if their dates had been assholes. Whatever that meant. Blushing at her thoughts, Elaine had never heard either of her roommates crying out like she did when she had an orgasm. Maybe a vibrator would be okay, she thought.
Eventually opportunity and curiosity got the better of her. The next time her roommates went out, she turned off the lights, stripped naked and slipped between the clean sheets on her bed. For the next three hours she came and came and came. Zeroing in on her final climax, the batteries ran out In a fit of frustration and with her fingers a blur on her numb clitoris, she hesitated, moaned, then jammed the vibrator into herself. The pain of 'becoming a woman' ignited her best orgasm yet, so strong it floored her and left her bucking and gasping for air. Almost an hour later she woke up sprawled on the floor beside her bed, wondering if she'd somehow knocked herself unconscious.
Elaine spent the next few days ignoring her roommate's questions and putting off buying new batteries. She was shaken by the intensity of the experience and was worried there was something wrong with her. She was also concerned about whether the neighbours heard. Over a quiet Sunday dinner a week later, Elaine admitted to her roommates she had tried the vibrator. Kendra and Chelsea put aside their teasing and they sat and drank wine, talking about all kinds of things into the night.
Though she hadn't admitted to breaking her hymen, after talking to her friends Elaine realised her experience wasn't all that unusual for the first time with a vibrator. Both girls described their first times as mind-blowing and wanting to do it again and again. They said the intensity was caused by the newness of the experience and would be less so in the future.
Elaine was convinced and went out the very next day and bought batteries. Stuff it, she thought as she bounded down to the local supermarket with renewed enthusiasm. It wasn't until she asked for two long-life batteries that she wondered what she looked like. Blushing madly, she wondered if the sales girl also had a vibrator and recognised the batteries she was buying. Before she knew it she could feel the heat in her cheeks and her nipples stiffening. Wonderful, she thought, now I even LOOK guilty.
Her pussy was wet all the way home with what she wished was delicious anticipation. It sure felt good, and she couldn't wait to try the vibrator again. But it wasn't true. She already knew if she blushed from even mild embarrassment her pussy would moisten. Hoping her lovers never found out, she feared her weakness might be taken advantage of, or used against her. She really didn't know how someone might react.
Without actually lying, Elaine had alluded to being more experienced than she was whenever sexual matters came up. Which was rare. Neither Kendra nor Chelsea had ever asked her point blank whether she was a virgin, and it wasn't like they'd known each other all their lives. After that one time, they hadn't talked about masturbating or vibrators again. They talked about men, but they were never very graphic. As the days rolled by, she was pretty sure the subject was now ancient history.
Every time she needed to buy batteries her tummy fluttered and she'd start getting nervous. Going through a set almost every session, she needed to buy quite a few. She couldn't shake the idea that whoever sold her the batteries knew what she was doing with them. In order to appear less obvious, she started buying other unnecessary items at the same time or going to different stores so no one would recognise her as 'that girl who goes through so many batteries she must be masturbating'.
She felt her cheeks warming as she made herself a coffee. Over the last five weeks, she'd used the vibrator almost every chance she had. A week ago she promised herself she would avoid it for seven days, just to prove she wasn't addicted and still had some self-control. A week was a long time and it hadn't been easy. The seventh day had been and gone and she had to wait until the eighth for a night alone.
About a month earlier she had discovered a website on the 'net' and had started reading all kinds of stories. The effect on her had been amazing. Some of the stories turned her on tremendously and she loved that feeling. There were so many and the choices were just endless. It seemed as though every sex act and every fantasy ever conceived had been written about. Flushed with passion, she had caught herself rubbing her thighs together many times while reading. After finding the part of the site where the best stories were listed, she read and read, beginning with Romance and First Time and moving on to Erotic Couplings then Loving Wives.
Whenever she had a moment she would read one, loving how it made her feel. Daydreaming of a story during lectures or at work became a regular occurrence. The more debauched the story, the more memorable it was for her. Some of the stories in Exhibitionism and Voyeurism had her on edge for days, and some of the offerings from the Group Sex and Mind Control categories were unforgettable.
She loved the stories and if they were well written, she could become completely immersed in them. One day it occurred to her that the stories she enjoyed were becoming more and more 'extreme', particularly in language, and she wondered about it. She rationalised that it was simply fantasy and her sensibilities were changing. It was far less confronting to read the words than to have them spoken to her. That only happened in her dreams. And she couldn't control her dreams, so that was okay. And anyway, if she didn't like a story, she could simply choose another one. Most of the time she just read them. She didn't have to agree to everything that went on, she just had to read and let go.
Her favourite things about the 'net' were the safety and the anonymity. To be able to disappear into the ether was extremely comforting and she could do it all from her own room. She could turn on and turn off on a whim, and she felt like she was in control of her admittedly solitary sexual life. Her anonymity was assured. No one would be any the wiser. For now, it was just about perfect.
Besides, she'd found some stories to be quite educational. One story in the Exhibitionism category prompted her to dance naked in front of the mirror in the bathroom after a shower. She realised it turned her on to watch herself. Sometimes when she got out of the shower she would turn sideways and watch intently as she caressed a nipple and watched it grow. She had 'pencil eraser' type nipples and they never ceased to amaze her. They were very sensitive and her nipples hardened regularly, embarrassing her and demanding a thick bra.
If the truth were told, she quite liked her breasts. In bed she could caress them for twenty minutes and barely notice the time passing. Seeing the reflection of herself plucking and twisting her nipples was almost like watching someone else perform for her. Either that or it was like watching herself perform for a lover. Whichever it was, it turned her on. She knew if she ever did dance for a lover, he would be happy with how she looked. Her breasts were full, round and smooth and she often wondered what they were doing on her slim, five-foot-five frame. They were perhaps slightly out of proportion and had embarrassed her when she was younger, but nowadays she covered them with loose clothing and sweatshirts. She was pretty sure no one had any idea whether she had a nice body or not.
Of course, during her week of denial, she still had to masturbate. She had grown quite fond of playing with her body, and not doing it was out of the question. The two nights during the last week that she was on her own, she read lots of amazing stories, then later fingered herself to many orgasms. But those two nights had been difficult. It was always like that when she denied herself something. Like if she swore off chocolate, the one thing she couldn't get off her mind, was chocolate. By the end of the week, she was seething with the need to feel that buzzing toy taking her over the edge.
She found being alone in the apartment very exciting. Sometimes she contemplated stripping down to her underwear, or even naked, just for fun, but she never did. She didn't have the nerve. What if her roommates came home and caught her? It would be worse than when they gave her the vibrator, and she would just die. So instead, she would get a little dressed up, but leave out the underwear. The idea of being braless and panty-less was way more exciting anyway. It felt so much better, and so much more wicked and naughty, to be without underwear. Besides, she'd begun playing with her body while in front of the computer, and less layers meant easier access.
Today was Friday and her horrible week was up. Braving the humiliating task of buying batteries, she had bought extra, just in case. It crossed her mind that she had no reason not to use her vibrator right away. Her roommates had left and would be out for hours, and she was already hot from thinking about tonight all through her classes. Still, there was an element of delicious torture to holding off for a while.
There was something about having hard nipples and a squishy pussy that appealed to her on some animal level. She felt horny and attractive, as thought each went hand in hand. She thought she was prettier, more desirable, and more sensual if her body was aroused. She just felt good. It was as simple as that, and she liked the feeling. With the whole night ahead of her, for the next hour or so she was happy to stew in her own juices.
Only just last week, on a whim and desiring some human contact, Elaine registered a nickname and entered a chat room. She had chosen the name Naughtygirl and was immediately bombarded with all kinds of disgusting proposals. Finding it a bit confronting, she wondered if all the girls entering the chat rooms were treated that way.
Just to escape she tried clicking on a room. It was a Hot Tub room and she was immediately disappointed. An argument was going on and if there was a hot tub, she saw no evidence of it. She tried changing rooms and went into a Family Roleplay room that was filled with daddies and daughters and uncles and nieces. Someone immediately accosted her, telling her to, "Call me Daddy and suck my cock!" She was shocked and backed out of the chat rooms without replying.
She'd sat back for a moment and thought about what had happened. Reminding herself she was on an adult site consisting of what were generally considered to be pornographic stories, she wondered if she was being a bit prudish. She shouldn't really have expected manners or good behaviour, should she?
Thinking about some of the words different men used 'right to her face' made Elaine blush. She knew she was safe, no matter what anyone said to her. She was at home in front of the computer, and that freed her to be, or accept, anything she chose. Since then, and with her confidence restored, she had visited the chat rooms almost every day. She'd even started to think that chatting online was made for her. It was fun and she found it all very new and exciting.
She made up a whole new persona for Naughtygirl, becoming a free and slutty waitress, slightly air headed, who worked in New York and was being regularly 'fucked' by her duty manager. She decided Naughtygirl always said 'fucked' and never said 'made love'. The ideas she came up with turned her on. Naughtygirl shaved her pussy, and Naughtygirl never wore panties. She felt safe and separate and was smart enough to make something up if any probing questions were asked. Naughtygirl could also say 'no' when guys asked for her email or her phone number, and she found it easy to refuse dates and meetings.
Her vocabulary quickly expanded to include such words and 'dick' and 'cock' and 'pussy'. She rarely even thought to say those words, but typing them made her shiver with arousal. Still, when describing herself, words such as 'slut' or 'whore' were completely out of the question. She liked to think of Naughtygirl as either 'sensual' or 'taken advantage of', but never a 'slut'. And she really didn't like the word 'cunt' being used in any kind of conversation. She certainly wasn't going to type it, and as soon as someone called her pussy a 'cunt', the mood would be spoiled and she'd just click out of the room.
On a couple of occasions she had wondered if the frank language was one of the reasons she kept returning. Talking to men in ways she never could in real life was appealing. She found some of the conversations made her very wet, and she'd taken to sitting on a folded towel. Naughtygirl 'sucked cock' and was 'fucked hard', and Elaine learned that it wasn't only in stories than men liked to fuck women in the ass. Of course, she let the men think she was actually doing these things with all kinds of 'big fat dildos', but in fact the most she did was lightly stroke her seething pussy. But she didn't mind.
For once she could be anything. Do anything. She could role-play for fun or pleasure, turning guys on and watching them type out their orgasms. She could pretend to suck them and fuck them. The possibilities seemed endless and it was all very safe. No one asked her if she was really like the persona she projected on-line. They rarely asked probing questions with their hard cocks in their hands.
About an hour ago a guy had messaged her as soon as she logged on. It was a man she had spoken to before and he liked playing with Naughtygirl. He started telling her she was in a nightclub with him and he was toying with her and telling her to do all kinds of crazy things. Elaine just giggled and shook her head and typed back, "Oh yeah, baby!" The guy was very imaginative and she sat back and typed 'Mmmmm, Mmmmmm..." at all the appropriate moments while he spun his erotic tale. When he finally, "shot his load deep in her ass, right there in the nightclub," she was pretty worked up. She imagined herself reaching orgasm at that moment in the club, and typed back, "Oh God, yes! I'm cumminggggg!!!"
After waiting the appropriate amount of time to 'recover', she hitched up her skirt and gently stroked her pussy, finding herself to be absolutely soaked and coating her fingers with her juices immediately. It was very exciting to read the messages he was sending her, telling her to "finger her cunt harder" and "suck her fingers clean". She couldn't wait to get to bed. She glanced at the time and decided to go and play with her vibrator really soon.
She didn't want to seem ungrateful, so she thanked her cyber-partner and told him she thought he was really good and hoped they could play again. The guy started asking her questions wanting to know all about her and requested a picture so he could imagine her. This was a question she had deflected before.
The two pictures of herself on the computer she didn't like. One had been taken down by the shore last year and showed her long dark hair blowing gently out behind her as she stood on the sand. Unfortunately she had been snapped in a bikini and she wasn't showing that to anyone in the chat rooms. The other was more recent, a close up of her face with her tongue poking out, showing off her newly acquired haircut. She thought it was a good picture to share with her family, but it was too goofy for Naughtygirl. She'd scanned them and e-mailed them to her cousin who wanted to see her new shaggy bob.
But instead of showing them to Eight Inch Adonis, she told him she had to go. He asked her when she was going to be on again and started telling her when he would return, so she could synchronise. By now she was starting to feel awkward and just told him, 'Soon!' and clicked off.
"Mmmmm, such fun," Elaine said to herself happily, switching off her computer and leaving her fantasy world behind. Standing, she smoothed her skirt over her hips and straightened the hem, then headed to the bathroom to wash her hands.
She shook her head at herself, smiling at her reflection in the bathroom mirror. Thinking it over, she was amazed at the kinds of feelings she was experiencing. Who would guess that 'Elaine the Homebody' was Naughtygirl, the girl who sucked and fucked and took dildos up her ass even though she never did any of those things? She knew she should have been out having fun with her roommates or at least studying, instead of playing with herself in front of the computer and goofing off. Or jacking off. Or jilling off, or whatever it was called.
"Fingering my cunt!" she said aloud, and giggled. Her hand flew to her mouth, staring wide-eyed at the mirror in shock. She whispered, "I just said 'cunt'," and giggled again. What is happening to me? she wondered.
It was just so... wicked! And so unlike her! Elaine had carefully cultivated a façade of aloofness that was utterly transparent to her roommates, but worked well when keeping strangers at arms length. She avoided going out unless it was either absolutely necessary, or to somewhere she thought was 'her kind of scene'. Like a library, coffee shop, or a small party and, on the odd occasion when she couldn't get out of it, to the dance club in the city.
In real life, Elaine's manner was naturally defensive and few men had the self-confidence to approach her in the first place. She told herself she didn't like the pushy type. She 'didn't want to meet the wrong kind of guy'. And yet, she wanted to be swept off her feet. She was intelligent enough to recognise the irony. She felt like she was wound into a tight ball of inaction, and didn't know how to break free.
The highlight of her sex-life was a drunken, after-hours grope in the supply closet at the office where she worked part-time. The job itself was a mindless mail-sorting one, but the hours were good and it did have its benefits. The supply closet incident alone was enough to give her masturbation material for half a year. She sighed deeply and frowned at her reflection while she dried her hands.
Will I ever find someone right for me? she wondered. Or will I die a spinster, dried up and locked away, without even a memory to masturbate to? She pushed her designer glasses back up her nose and pushed her sad thoughts to the back of her mind. She had fresh batteries and a couple of hours before her roommates returned, and nothing was going to dampen her mood. She swallowed as she retrieved her plastic toy from her dresser and lay back on her bed. Remembering her cyber session, she blushed as she recalled him ordering her around. She couldn't believe she almost sucked her juices from her fingers! She giggled. She couldn't even remember his name.
"I'm such a slut," she said aloud, giggling and removing her clothes. She slipped between the covers, reaching for the lamp switch. Her excitement mounted when she hesitated, then chose to leave it on while she masturbated.
Then she had a crazy thought. She grabbed her small pocketbook mirror from her bag on the floor. How dirty would it be to watch myself while masturbating? she wondered. She threw back the sheets and felt the rush of arousal spread over her body as she held the small mirror to reflect exactly what she was doing.
Wow! She'd never looked at herself like that before. It was strange. It was almost like watching someone else. Goosebumps broke out on her arms and thighs and her nipples pulsed. The thatch of fine dark hair on her pussy grew naturally into a cute little Mohawk, and the lips of her pussy were almost hairless and tucked in. She had taken to shaving the strays around her pussy a few years ago and it was framed nicely in the reflection of the mirror in her hand.
She draped her other hand gently over her lips and drew up her fingers, lightly grazing over the warm, soft flesh. Tingles rolled over her skin and her eyes glazed in a fixed stare. Spreading her first and second fingers, she drew apart her outer lips and she gasped at how pink and oily the inner lips appeared. Drawing her feet up the bed, she bent her knees and watched in fascination as her pussy flowered open the wider she spread them. With her legs at a ninety-degree angle, Elaine could see the wet inner lips nestled between the more pale puffy outer lips. She couldn't think how to describe it. It was kind of pretty, but well... she wasn't sure. It was just fascinating.
She grabbed the spare pillow and arranged it between her legs so she could lean the small mirror up against it. She folded over her other pillow and leaned against it, happy with the results. She smiled wickedly. NOW I'll finger my cunt! As soon as she had the wicked thought, she blushed and reached for her pussy with both hands. Again she parted her lips and drew breath as she spread her knees wider. A pearl of wetness appeared at the base of her pussy. That's my hole, she thought. My cunt.
In the mirror she guided her index finger down to the bead of moisture and drew it slowly up between her lips, groaning at the sight and feel. With her knees held so widely, her lips wetly parted showing the glistening, hot pink flesh within.
Mesmerised by the sight, Elaine slowly caressed her fingertip up and down, back and forth between her lips, feeling herself getting hotter, her flesh crawling with pleasure. Her buttocks tensed, arching her ass upwards and spreading herself more lewdly as she pushed her finger slowly into the hot velvety tunnel of her pussy. Releasing her outer lips, her left hand reached up to her chest, grasping her nipple and pinching gently down on it the way she liked.
She groaned, wishing she had a larger mirror so she could see all of herself. The thought evaporated and her mouth gaped as she added a second finger and slid them both in to the hilt. "Ohhh, Goddd..." she moaned, her eyes rolling back into her head. She was sliding the fingers over her slick flesh and into herself, stimulating clitoris and vagina simultaneously. Thick honey coated them and a large drip was heading for her asshole. She shivered, watching as each pump of her fingers added a little more moisture to the downward trail.
Finally she could stand it no longer and reached for her vibrator. Turning her head she realised barely ten minutes had passed. She giggled thinking it was going to be a long night. Hurriedly turning it to the highest setting, the toy leapt to life in her hands and she shuddered in anticipation.
She got comfortable and slid two fingers back into her pussy, hovering the toy over her clit. As she drew her fingers up and out, she spread them, opening her inner lips widely and unhooding her sensitive little pea. She trembled throughout as she watched both the mirror and the toy itself descend agonisingly slowly toward its target. It seemed like the air crackled around her ears as the vibrator and her little pink bud met. Elaine convulsed, her hips rising off the bed as she fought to draw back the toy. Again and again she tortured herself, touching and withdrawing, building higher and higher.
With knees so wide they were touching the bed, she straightened her fingers and plunged them into herself, fucking herself quickly and holding the toy to her clit. She gritted her teeth as the pleasure grew and blossomed across her skin, her inner muscles tightening in approach to orgasm. She recognised it and tried to stop, oblivion seconds away. With a mighty effort she pulled the toy from her clit and slowed her fingers, careful not to touch it. Her body shuddered and she squirmed in protest, moaning hotly.
Elaine knew it would come fast if she let it. She wanted it so bad. All the tension and expectation, all the fears and disappointments, all shattered into a million pieces. She needed to be free. She needed to cum and cum hard. She turned her head and bit into the corner of her pillow before turning her eyes back to the incredible sight of her dripping cunt skewed on her own fingers. She straightened the slender digits and started pumping them harder and harder, full length in and out of herself. Her body caught fire as the vibrator crashed into her clit, forcing grunts and squeals out of her mouth and into the soft pillow. Her back arched, lifting her ass off the bed, effectively tightening her pussy and tripling the pleasure.
Unable to stop herself, her orgasm burst free, sweeping her away into unconsciousness. The last thing she remembered was the incredible sight of her convulsing pussy, squirting her juices right at the mirror and her own anguished cries of, "Fucking my cunt! Fucking my cunt!"
She woke up the next morning with a start, wondering what happened. Looking around, she breathed more easily, noticing nothing out of place. Throwing back the bed sheet, she was surprised to see she had even gone to the trouble of putting her panties back on. She pulled open her bedside drawer and there was her mirror and vibrator. She swallowed, thinking the toy had blood on it. She didn't remember fucking it, and certainly not hard enough to hurt herself. She took it out and suddenly could hardly breathe.
In sultry red lipstick, someone had left a kiss right on her toy.