What They Say

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What girls say vice what they really mean

What girls say   What they mean
Can't we just be friends?   There is no way in hell I am going to let any part of your body touch any part of mine, again.
I just need some space...   ... without you in it
Can you help me with my homework?   If I keep whining, the fool will do it for me.
Do I look fat in this dress?   We haven't had a fight in a while.
No, pizza's fine.   Cheap bastard!
I just do not want a boyfriend now.   I just do not want (YOU as) a boyfriend now.
I don't know; what do you want to do?   I can't believe that you have nothing planned.
Come here.   My puppy does this too.
I like you but...   I don't like you.
You never listen.   You never listen.
We're moving too quickly.   I am not going to sleep with you until I find out if this guy in Bio has a girlfriend.
I'll be ready in a minute.   I AM ready, but I am going to make you wait because I know you will.
Oh, no, I will pay for myself.   I am just being nice; there is no way I am going dutch.
Oh yes!  Right there!   Well, near there; I just want to get this over with.
I'm just going out with the girls.   We are gonna get slopy and make fun of you and your friends.
There's no one else.   I'm doing your brother.
Size doesn't matter...   Unless I want an orgasm.

What guys say vice what they really mean

What guys say   What they mean
It's just orange juice, try it.   Three more shots, and she'll have her legs around my head.
She's kinda cute.   I want to bang her till I'm blue!
I don't know if I like her.   She won't blow me.
I need you.   My hand is tired.
I had her.   I had (wet dreams about) her.
I really want to get to know you better.   ...so I can tell my friends about it.
How do I compare with all your other boyfriends?   Is my penis really that small?
You're the only girl I've ever cared about.   You are the only girl who has not rejected me.
I want you back.   ...for tonight anyway.
We've been through so much together.   If it was not for you, I never would have lost my virginity.
I miss you so much.   I am so horny that my roommate is starting to look good.
No, I do not want to dance right now.   Shoot!  She'll know that I have a hardon!
I'm different from all the other guys.   I'm not circumcised.