As the Martians arrive on the Earth in their spaceship, their leader remarks “From now on we will we speak in Spanish, for it is the language spoken in the country we will be visiting!” While it is logical that the Martians would speak to Spanish-speakers in Spanish, no one bothers to ask why they’d speak in Spanish even when addressing the entire planet via their pirated Martian broadcasts. Or, even more illogically, they continue speaking Spanish when they have Mexican captives on their spaceship, within earshot of their Martian huddles. While they plot and scheme, their captives are able to eavesdrop. If they had spoken in Martian, they would have really saved themselves some trouble.

These aliens are generally a bit light on logic. They arrive stripped to the waist, wearing tights and Jiffy Pop bags on their head. They have been monitoring our planet (because aliens in movies always have absolutely nothing better to do than sit around and watch the Earth... they should get Martian TiVo) and feel we are on the verge of destroying our planet with nuclear weapons. They demand we end our aggressions and live peacefully, or the Martians will beat the holy hell out of us. To the movie’s credit, numerous humans note that these Martians are trying to encourage pacifism through the ever-present threat of violence (Then again, this was essentially th United States' primarily military policy during the Cold War). Of course, the humans take one look at these weirdos that are appearing unannounced on their television sets and assume this is all one big comedy skit. So the visitors decide to make an example out of the peace-loving people of Mexico and show the extent of their power in a way that will make the rest of the planet pay attention. They claim Mexico will use its peaceful nature as a way to negotiate peace with the rest of the Earth, but you have to think they just beat up on the peaceniks cause they wouldn’t fight back.

Or so they thought! For the Mexicans have Santo on their side. Yes Santo, masked wrestler by day, superhero (complete with cape!) at night. The first Martians descend in the middle of a wrestling exhibition Santo is giving to some local children, his mask no doubt helping to fend off any lawsuits that may have resulted from the injuries these kids sustained while they were choking each other. The aliens have a laser beam in their hats that can disintegrate humans, so naturally Santo is able to fell them with a shoulder tackle (For those keeping score at home, Martians DO know how to wrestle).

This sets up the film’s repetitive plot of Santo wandering around, Martians teleporting in and wrestling him for a while, Santo pulling victory from the jaws of defeat at the last moment, the Martians teleporting away, and Santo left looking confused and lost, ready to begin his wandering anew. For their part, the Martians are absolutely priceless. The humans react to them with fright, which the Martians attribute to their outlandish costumes, not the fact that they wish to turn the entire human race into a large gust of wind, so they decide to transform their appearance to one more pleasing to us lowly earthlings. Somehow they wind up looking like Greek gods with short skirts. In some stroke of screenwriting genius, these fashion emergency Martians laugh at Santo’s appearance, saying he “dresses strangely” when, in fact, he is the human with a fashion sense closest to their own.