The letter below is from the pastor of a church. A gay teenaged church member committed suicide.
We encourage anybody contemplating suicide to get assistance. Do not fight through your feelings alone. You are not alone. There are people who care and who can help. Talk to somebody. Tell somebody how you feel. Discuss how you feel with a trusted friend of family member. Dial 911 or your local emergency phone number. Call the hospital or the police, talk to your physician, or get an appointment to talk to a counsellor.
Three weeks ago I was called to the home of a church member. I had no idea what the problem was until I arrived. The 17 year old son had committed suicide.
This young man had been seeing me weekly for close on 12 months. Even after such a period of time, I gleamed no indication that he might be suicidal. I must also add here that he counted himself blessed to be able to call himself a Christian regardless of the persecution that he endured.
This boy attended a local high school and was subjected to verbal, physical, sexual and emotional abuse at the hands of fellow students. Many was the time he would come to me to help clean him up before he returned home to his mother. Beatings were on a regular basis. His school locker and school books had words such as fag, queer, homo, and others that I do not consider suitable to suggest in this forum. He was afraid to have a shower at school because of the sexual abuse he would be subjected to, and yet, this was far from the worst that would happen to him. On a number of occasions he was stripped naked and tied to football posts in the middle of the school paddock. And, as if this was in itself was not sufficient for his tormentors, he had painted on his chest, legs and forehead such words as I suggested above. On one occasion he had a heavy weight tied too his genitalia and left there is intense pain. This was the undoubtedly the worst type of humiliation that he could experience at school. The school authorities stood silent and by so doing sanctioned brutality and dehumanisation of this young man.
Why did this happen, well, sad as it may be, if you are a 17 year old male and do not have a girl friend, apparently this automatically qualifies you as being “gay”. This was the rumour that was gaining momentum daily at school and a consequence, some of his peers took it upon himself to torture this boy without actually having anything substantial upon which to base their theory.
It was not long before the church he fellowshipped at heard that he was “gay” and admonished him accordingly. “How can you be a Christian if you are gay, you are going to hell?” So much for the love that Jesus Christ centred his ministry on. Rather what I consider was evident was that of judgementalism and hatred. This young man was in a no win situation. I believe that what he was made to endure would have sorely tested the strongest of adults.
The irony of this story is that this 17 year old boy was actually gay. He had never had sexual contact with any other person, male or female, and apart from his mother and myself, no one else knew of his sexuality. Every judgement of this young man was made on the sad and ill informed assumption that because he had no girl friend it stood to reason that he was gay. But what of the church? What gave those members the right to take on more judgement than Jesus Himself executed whilst on earth, Jesus said, “I judge no one.” Many here may well find themselves bankrupt debtors on the day of judgement.
Let us not forget that the blood of this AN UNKNOWN VICTIM OF HATE CRIME will remain forever on the hands of those who tormented and judged him.
In conclusion I feel that I must say this about that young man. Not once did he ever complain or talk in a negative manner about those who were mistreating him. I have no doubt that on that great and awesome day, the Lord will say, “Well done good and faithful servant, enter in.”