| Allow me to tell you a story about a man, whose dedication to drinking is ideal here at matty golf. He's a man who, at his peak, could drink with the best of them and keep it down. A man who was seen fearlessly chugging a beer in bennigan's parking lot in front of all the restaurant patrons, as well as partaking in the legendary "midnight run, and consuming an estimated 16 beers and staying up until 3 am watching metallica videos. Yes, i'm talking about Damon LaSalle. Damon became a member of Matty Golf during the opening days of summer last year, and enjoyed a summer full of drinking and partying with all of the crew, and his presence was much valued. However, Damon's extreme dedication for his Ski Racing forced him to discontinue his drinking starting at the end of summer and lasting until the conclusion of his season. Contrary to popular belief (matt messmer), Damon felt that consuming alcohol would affect his coordination, as well as desire, and decided to put it on hold for a while. Acheiving his goals and doing his best was more important to him than any one night of drunken fun. Many felt that he wouldn't last, and that he would give in to the sweet temptress they call alcohol. But to the surprise of many, with the exception of the night of "gold on the dance floor," Damon lasted a full 7 months without getting drunk. His dedication is much admired, but paying tribute is not the purpose of this article. For as of 3/2/1 (countdown to drunkeness), Damon has returned. A night beginning at mezz's house provided a sufficient place for damon's comeback. After tapping "the source," the boys kicked off the long awaited return of damon. He enjoyed Malibu and corona's with the limes (only the finest alcohol) which provided a perfect amount of drunkeness. Damon even funnelled 3 beers, one of which vincent finaldi poured 3 shots of vodka into without damon's knowledge. At this point, damon as well as the others were drunk and ready for some good old D.I.P. action, and so boys found themselves at wendy's for the drunken munchies. While getting up to get extra mayo, Matt ate damon's spicy chicken sandwich and shouted obsenities at whippany kids in the middle of wendy's. An sober outside source witnessed matt trip and fall over the curb, and also saw damon run up and kick him. Both were too drunk to recall, but damon assures it was for valid reasoning. Freshmen party, McDonalds parking lot, and starbucks parking lot were also stops along the drunken voyage, in which matt threw up in chad's car and damon got mad and accidentally broke a corona bottle as well as threw milk duds at some strangers car while it was driving by. The boys returned to moses's to sober up in hope that they would be alright to face his parents in the morning. All in all, a great night- Damon appreciates all that was done for him as well as the support of his fellow matty golf members during his triumphant return. |
| *Archives 2* |
| *THE DECLARATION OF INTOXICATION* Listen up! and listen up good! I know you all think i'm a little washed up, and maybe i'm a little off my game, but the fact remains that I was chuggin vodka, funneling beers, mixing whiskerade and drinking by myself in my room when the rest of you were going to the movies. Now I know that Plan B has affected me in ways that have affected my alcoholic drinking ability, but like gambling, it was just a phase. The fact remains that I am Irish and beer flows through my veins, My mother was a vodka bottle, and my father was a beer keg. I am the Irish E-mailer! I am NINA! So I am gonna say this once and only once.........I was drunk of the year 2000, and even if I have to drink every waking moment, I will be drunk of the year 2001. So for all of you that doubt me, prepare to be disproven, and for all of you that dont remember my ways, prepare to be amazed. NIR is now NSPR, Need Stomach Pumped Rick. With that said, Ill see ya when i see ya! Rick Da Mick P.S.Vinnie is going down |
| "It's Called Hernando's Hideaway" |
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| Ricky to Chad-Saturday Night June 9th Chad, think of the white mice, then you will know how i feel, and I feel like the pink mice did that day that they did not find any cheese, think of the carny and how matt felt the day she said no to him, and then you will know how i feel on this lonely night without you, the chicken salad, the chicken salad, the chicken salad........................ |
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| Ricky to Matt Saturday february 16th 2002 "....Yo Matt, Obvously, you dont have your phone......but..if the cops gotcha..dont say anyting about me....and if they dont got ya...gimme a call buddy" |
| My name is Jimmy, hear me roar. I'v been the same size since I was four. It was seventh grade. I was thirteen years old. I couldnt break free from Dan Wessling's hold. JIMMY'S X-MAS CAROL Schram pulled down his pants. And showed me his lance. I have to admit, I took more than a glance. T'was a wonderful day, for it set me free It opened my eyes to homosexuality. I work at Kings..I work every day I am still just a damn little gay. The floors I mop, the shelves I stock. I like to suck....lots of cock. |
| "I don't have any accomplishes" -Ricky Frederickson |
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