Previously
on Buffy the Vampire Slayer. Dawn = Key, Glory = God, Ben=Glory,
Knights=Bad Guys. Knight=brain sucked, Tara=brain sucked, Scoobs=Screwed.
Currently on
Buffy the Vampire Slayer it's about 1/2 second since last show. Buffy
grabs Dawn and runs while Willow puts up a diversionary wall of force allowing
her and Tara to escape. Glory chases Buffy and Dawn until she get
hits by a truck which allows Ben to take over the body (in a stunning red
satin under sheath with hand crocheted white lace over tunic). Ben
heads to Glory's apartment where a Hobbette tries to get him to give into
the inevitable and just join Glory philosophically as well as the current
physical ménage e deux. Ben passes. The Scoobs regroup
at Xander's apartment where Buffy announces that they're getting the hell
out of Dodge. They're to handle supplies and she'll arrange a ride,
Spike's ancient mid-sized RV with tinfoil windows.
It quickly
becomes apparent that Buffy is winging it. The ancient instinct of
fight or flight has been forced into flight, a tactic that is totally foreign
to the Slayer. Her only strategy seems to be to keep moving in the
hopes that she can evade Glory. Turns out that the old RV can evade
Glory but not a dozen Knights on horses.There
is a fight that our guys temporarily win with the only casualty being Spike’s
hands when he grabs a sword by the wrong end.However,
a lancer stabs Giles in the side, taking him out of action, causing the
RV to flip and the Scoobs forced to take shelter in an old gas station.
The situation,
in a word, sucks.Giles is going
to die without medical attention, Spike is useless against the Knights,
Willow has created an energy wall which traps them as much as protects
them, Tara is still insane and getting more agitated, Xander is actually
bonding with Spike and the only plus in the column is that they have accidentally
managed to capture the Knight’s general.They
use this plus Xander’s impassioned speech about honour in warfare ala Sgt.
Rock to get Giles medical help.
In other words,
Ben.
Meanwhile the
General tells the back story.Once
upon a time there was a demon realm ruled by three hell-gods.One
of them, Glorificus, grew power hungry (and have you ever heard of a hell-god
who wasn’t greedy?) and, in fear, the other two rose up against her.They
were barely able to defeat her and where unable to destroy her so they
did the next best thing.They exiled
her essence to our reality locked in the mortal body of a man.
In other words,
Ben.
Anyway, the
only way to kill Glory is to kill the man (as Ben goes, so goes the world).Then,
the two gods created the Key which, if used will open all the barriers
between all the dimensions.This
means the end of order, the beginning of chaos and forget the trains running
on time.The monks thought that
they could harness the power of the Key but Glory was powerful enough to
overwhelm her human prison to escape for short periods.
Ben arrives
and treats Giles.The General tries
to convince him to kill the child with the needs of the many outweighing
the needs of the one argument.Ben
looks like he’s going to fold but stands firm to his “do no harm” oath.Until
Glory shows up and does major harm to the General. Buffy and Spike
try to hold her off but she grabs Dawn and escapes.She
punches a short term hole in Willow’s barrier and, by the time Willow drops
it for Buffy, Glory is gone and all the Knights are dead.
Buffy slowly
walks through the carnage, sinking to her knees as Willow asks her what
to do, what they should do, what’s the plan.
Fade to black.
Random Quotes
Glory: Any
last words?
Buffy: Jus' one. Truck.
Ben: Do
you know why I wanted to be a doctor?
Minion: Flattering drawstring pants?
Dawn: It
can't get any worse.
Arrow: ffffffffffffffffttttttttttt
Buffy: You know it's your fault for saying that.
Tara: Look,
pretty horsies!
Willow: Don't hurt the horsies!
Buffy: (to Willow) We won't. (to Giles) Aim for
the horsies.
Giles: Being
able to place your heart above all else.I’m
so proud.You’ve come so far.You’re
everything a Watcher..I could have hoped for.
Ben: Sometimes
terrible things happen to good people.
Random Notes:
Okay. Buffy killed a man. And I'd be really hard pressed
to make a case for self defence here. The guy had no weapon in hand,
was on precarious footing and was about 10 feet away from her. Hardly
in a life threatening position to the Slayer who managed to subdue and/or
knock out and/or avoid an entire army last year. So, why did Buffy
kill the guy? And why did she kill him with the same axe move that
she used on the straw dummy during the combat test in the episode Checkpoint?And
where, oh Buffy, are the signs of remorse that you demanded from Faith?I
mean, Faith said she didn’t care but Buffy didn’t even seem to notice.
Willow was
wearing a plaid shirt for the entire show. Mind you it had little
rhinestone designs and it was never clearly established as being flannel
but still.
Vis a vis the
shirt. It looked kinda like a cowboy shirt with the rhinestones.
Coincidence?Especially when it looks
like Willow is going to be walking through the Dreamscape of Buffy’s mind
next episode.
Two of my men
are dead?Maybe if you didn’t go
around stabbing them, guy.And is
that a vote of confidence?Hey, we’re
going to loose so let’s start putting the wounded out of their misery.
I betcha Cory
wishes that Buffy always carried Dawn or a box or something.The
stunt double that was carrying Dawn through the Quad was a much better
runner than SMG.
It pretty much looks like Buffy is going to have to kill someone this season. Either kill Ben to destroy Glory or Dawn to protect the universes. And, if it is a choice, Ben is sooooo dead. I mean, she killed Angel to protect the world and he looks much better in a dress than Ben.However, I’m betting Joss will pull a rabbit from the hat.
Speaking of
rabbits.Anya’s fear of rabbits gives
her a unique perspective on the eternal Bugs Bunny/Elmer Fudd feud.
I don't know
about bruising but, if you prick them - they bleed.
Willow refers
to the two clerics as Heckle and Jeckle, a pair of cartoon crows.If
memory serves “crow” use to be a disparaging term given to Roman Catholic
priests, particularly Jesuits, due to their long black robes.
Buffy has Ben’s
telephone number memorized after two dials.Maybe
the fact that the number was 1-213-384-5463 should have been a clue?
Okay, this
timing thing has me puzzled.The
war was a long time ago yet Ben is fairly young yet the Knights have been
seeking the Key for generations yet Glory is on first name basis with the
General.We’ll just go with it but
it is a bit sloppy on a show not known for it’s sloppiness.
I’m not sure
what the black eyes on Willow is supposed to represent anymore.I
mean, barriers are pretty non-evil.It’s
not like it was even as zappy as a Star Trek security force field.Or
maybe I’ve just got Star Wars too imprinted on my thinking.
Angel Notes:
Okay, I’m not a genius but even I thought that maybe the top should
go up in case it was, like, DAYTIME, in dimension X. Next, cudos
to the stunt guy who can gambol on hands and toes. Line of the show
is "Screw logic. We're getting Cordy back."
Host: Keep your heads down. Xenophobia is sort of the byword
around here.
Gunn: I don't get it. Why are they afraid of Xena?
I think she's kinda fly.
Wesley: Xenophobia (pronouncing it the British way). Fear
of foreigners.
Gunn: Oh. Then can we just forget I said that?