art-changeisgood

CHANGE IS GOOD

What am I doing... I've been sitting here in front of the computer for hours and I just didn't want to stand up and just go home... This were my words last Friday. I can't believe I was feeling this way and it's amazing how the enemy can remind you of your flaws sometimes. "How awful to receive such a comment from an officemate..." I thought. Imagine, being a Christian and everything, to think that were supposed to be leading by good example. To receive words such as these: "Are you really a Christian?" My friend laughed as she tells me this very straight, outspoken gesture, enough to make me stop and contemplate awhile, perhaps that's why I didn't wanna go home yet, I wanna face and examine these words that has somehow awaken me a bit.

Did I hear it right? More often than not, the truth always hurts. It just pinch you right there!

I have been always tagged as the "happy go lucky" type by my friends, the "creative" and the most frank among all. I've been always as straightforward as possible, how I feel about somebody or about myself, I express 'em right away or right at your face. Once I was called being so "ruthless" by my superior when I was with sales, of course I am not proud with that. Sometimes being a straightforward does not always mean it's good, there are consequences to it because the words that come out of your mouth is very powerful and it reflects you, says the Bible in Matthew 12:34, "For out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaks."

I must say I have always been such a "fan" too. If I like something', I worship it (yes I used to be an idolater, unfortunately) and I must see to it that one way or another, I get what I want. Whether that's something like a perfume, food, clothing, an artist for example, a book, etc. For example, if I really like a singer, I spend most of my time researching about that singer, spend my money to his albums, make sure I go to his concerts, studying about his life, hobbies and all that, a real waste of time! I am very assertive or should I say, aggressive. What I believe, I always fight for it 'till the end, without considering other's feelings.

There's another thing that I need to confess too, before I used to be so expressive when I am attracted to somebody or when I like someone or admire. I mean, I make it a point that that person would know how I feel about him/ her. I must say too that even when I got married already, I still admire a few good men, not for some unsafe intentions but for the sake of just admiring the person, "per se". For example, I admire my boss for his diligence or I admire someone for his courage, etc. In this area of my life, admittedly, I am still waiting for a great breakthrough and I know I am almost there.

Just recently, I have admired some officer here in the company where I work in. He's the head of one of the divisions in my company and he's also a Christian. He is just a dashing debonair and that's all I could say! Reminds me of my Hollywood crush, George Clooney. Just like my husband's crush, Cindy Crawford, I know that if ever he would meet someone like Ms. Crawford, he'll definitely like her or just simply admire her, nothing serious. Same thing with me. Let me state this clearly and categorically, what I have for this person is only an admiration, period. If ever it would go beyond that, then I think I'm matured enough to ask for God's help and his mercy. And I will definitely realize why since I have been in this kind of trap somehow. Remember, a person, specially those who are married, that looks for other kind of special connection from somebody outside of their marriages are definitely unhappy of their own relationships.

We must remember that satan's main target are every possible families he could destroy. Whether that would be an involvement of a third party, lack of time to your spouse, being busy at work, financial problems and so on. All I can say is that temptations for an elicit affair I think, is always the strongest among all aside from money, which is also powerful. Of course, when parents are destroyed, mother and father divorced, children eventually are destroyed too since curses are passed on from generation to generation, says the Bible. And so if children are destroyed, our society will be too. We cannot afford to be deceived by this. We may see right now our marriages are into deep pains and hurts or perhaps we may not able to see the kind of partner we have expected to be with us forever and it turned out to be the worse kind of partner, the first thing we need to do is to call on God. He's the only one who could help us and bring us out into the mess we have indulged in. Yes it is exciting and thrilling knowing there are no strings attached if you decide to splurge into temptation, but IT ISN'T WORTH IT! The consequences and the curse you will bring will affect even up to your future grandchildren and their children's children. Friends, it isn't worth it.

I do believe in what my Pastor once said. If you used to get turned on with sexy women, then stay out of women's magazines or sexy brochures. Do not even let your eyes see those or even take a peek at the sexy actress on TV! It's really like fasting or abstinence. If you love movies so much, then sell your DVD player or perhaps control yourself exhaustively. That's the way to really resist the devil and most importantly, ask God to change your desires. If you feel your love for your spouse is slowly draining, ask God to fill you with love for your partner and think about the positive things he or she has done for you. Just thinking that he or she is the father or mother of your beautiful children is more than enough to make you feel good and love your spouse again and again.

My friend even said, "You know, women like you are the ones' at fault why men try to cheat on their wives!" After I joked about my admiration to this person. I thought, "OH MY GOD!" I felt like I'm about to explode. So am I a dangerous woman now? I said to myself, "I will never accept that comment! It's a lie from satan. He is reminding me what I used to be and wanted to confirm to me that God never really changed me! What a terrible thing I thought, though I heard God spoke into my heart, "Who are you going to believe anyway? Do you want the enemy to be correct in his criticism?" Thank God for this revelation! So I said, "No! I am not like that, I cancel what you just said." I whispered after my officemate made her comment.

It's difficult to lay down all your cards but remember, being a Christian is not that easy. You must release everything and confess everything so that people who suffer the same circumstances may be blessed by your testimonies. God lets you deal with every areas in your life even the ones we think that are just petty but the truth is, a huge threat to our relationships. The Holy Spirit reveals them to you little by little and that by God's grace, it'll fade away. God wants you to share these experiences and your breakthroughs because He knows that you have endured all these and have successfully dealt with them.

So the question is, is it wrong to admire somebody else besides your spouse or partner? There's nothing really wrong with that as far as I'm concerned. But if your admiration would cause you to sin perhaps if you are already thinking of lustful things to that person you admire, the Bible clearly says in Matthew 5:27-28 to pluck out your eyes or to cut off your hand if these are the ones causing you to go on sinning. That's how strict and disciplined Christians should be when it comes to these. It's really easy to say, "...Well, no commitments, nothing serious so I'll just dip my hand so my whole arm is still safe." Remember, once you were caught by satan's trap, he will definitely pull your whole arm with force!

God doesn't condemn His people for we were already condemned that's why He sent His own Son to pay the price. Our Father in heaven rejoices once He has found His lost sheep says in Luke 15:32. We should know how to admit our sins and ask God for forgiveness. The Bible says that God is faithful and just to forgive us of our sins. And that once we repent, God has forgotten all about our sins and throws it out to the deepest sea. Ask God for His grace for only God can change our desires.

What I'm saying is, if admiring someone would eventually make you cheat on your wife or your husband, then forget about that person right away! We can never really tell when or who we are going to admire anyway because it just happens subliminally. We need to be always on guard because that's the beauty of satan's trap, it is tempting but deceiving. At first you won't even feel a thing. God definitely understands how we are since we're only human. He knows exactly our weaknesses and strengths. The best thing to do is to spend time on the word of God and think only about Him and His will for your life. If so, satan will find it difficult to enter your mind to apply on his tricks. Yes it is tough knowing that we used to operate in the flesh, but God's grace is more than sufficient.

By: Maya Guzman Santos