The Diary of a Ditz

I am a ditz.
Do not bother telling me anything of the slightest significance because I won't be able to comprehend the brevity of the situation.
Should some life-or-death situation occur (like world-wide Armageddon) and talking to me is unavoidable,
remember to do it very slowly,
using as many simple descriptive adjectives as you possibly can
- a miracle might happen and I might just get a grasp of what you are trying to convey.

I am a ditz.
Or at least that's what a majority of the District 308-B1 Omega Leos perceive me to be.

I whine and I complain and I give stupefying - because of their crude stupidity - answers.
If there's a problem I kick up a huge fuss - only to have somebody point out the answer lying right under my nose.
I have proven incapable of performing the most menial of tasks and capable of unravelling the most air tight of plans.

So it isn't their fault actually, because I have proven to be nothing else but a ditz.

It is a commensalistic relationship.
They find solace in my unthreatening and unassuming presence.
I am grateful not to be drawn into their silly politics and backstabbing complexities.

Politics and backstabbing that have been force-fed upon me, unfortunately.
I find humour in the fact that no matter how hard I try to elude all of this,
it always keeps knocking right back on my door refusing to leave me alone.
It is as though somebody out there knows what I am capable of and is trying to rope me into the endless spiralling.

But for now, I am still a ditz - and nothing the Comrade says will ever convince them otherwise.

While on a journey back from a Leo function, I was let into some sensitive information regarding a particular Club's future activities.
It was mentioned to me, casually, and I was reminded that this was all "confidential" information.
After which the conversation ended, because I obviously wouldn't have any input to contribute to the matter anyway.

Now, if only they had bothered to delve even further,
they would have found out that whatever they told me is no longer as "confidential" as they would like it to be
and that their plan is not as perfect as it seems.

How do I know?

Power is having the means to chart the stars, and yet not let the world in on it.

All hail the Queen of Ditz!

Margaret Alexandria Yoong
March 24, 2003