| The Gulf War: Reloaded (2003) |
| i remember 10 years ago, when i was about 8, there was this thing called the gulf war: operation desert storm. i was too young to understand why or who or what we were fighting, but now, with the gulf war: the sequel in full force, i was thinking i should shed a little light on the situation that is going on in america. my sources are way better than the news or cnn so fuck them... fuck them right in the ear! i see anti-war rallies. i see "FRENCH" fries and "FRENCH" toast being renamed to "FREEDOM" fries and "FREEDOM" toast (no joke). i see the resurgence of the hippie way of life. i see a reason for those wanna-be hippies to come out of their vans, pick up their guitars, and start singing pro-peace songs. and i am disgusted. utterly and thoroughly disgusted. i want to take you, my faithful reader, down my.. downward spiral of why i support the war on iraq. heres a list of things: - Hippies. I hate hippies with a mad passion. I hate them and their hotboxing vans fully loaded with lava lamps and tie-dye fabrics. I hate them and their guitar-singing, drug-induced disillusions about how peace and communism are synonymous. They protest anything and everything blindly. With these types of people around, it pisses me off that killing people is against the law. I hate hippies > Hippies hate the war on Iraq > I love the war on Iraq. - I drive a car from Cypress, CA to Northridge, CA almost every weekend. Gas prices are on a rise. As of now, 3/17/03, gas prices for regular unleaded are $2.07. By Summer '03, gas prices will most likely be at $3.00. Now, (with me sounding insensitive and selfish in all its glory) I would like that stupid-fuck Bush take Saddam Hussein out of power, install a new tyrannical government, and have that new government sell the USA oil at a cheaper price. - The new vernacular. In the aforementioned paragraph, "French" fries and "French" toast have officially been renamed to "Freedom" fries and "Freedom" toast. This of course was changed because of France is such an influence on American culture. (I know that this doesnt really have to do with why I support the war but fuck it) What the fuck is changing the name of a food thats not even French and pouring French wine down the drain going to do besides make some drunken hungry guy angry? - The anti-war rallies. These events are held by the hippies..... I know it..... its one big fucking conspiracy, I swear on everything holy. So we have these people chanting, "We won't fight your oil war" but cmon now, change up the flavor. Besides bellowing about the proverbial "Oil" scapegoat, try something different like, "I'm from Southern California, drove all the way up the San Francisco where one of the biggest Anti-War rallies were held, yelling about war, and still dont see the savage hypocrisy in just me being here!" That chant would catch on like wildfire! But on a more serious note, USA has been bombing the fuck out of Iraq and other countries for years. Where the fuck were these anti-war hippies then, when it wasn't in the limelight? Now, after reading this, I bet you could see how low, cynical, and selfish I am. But for real yo yo, I give much props to those who are actually fighting in the mid-east. God be with you. Fuck Bush though. And another prayer to those families actually in Iraq. I'm sorry that our president is such a stupid-fuck. God (or Allah) be with everyone. |