Three Of Hearts vs

Three Of Hearts vs. Threesome
Scot Livingston takes a look at two triplet-minded love affair movies.

THREE OF HEARTS
THREESOME

Year? 1993 1994
MPAA Rating? R R
Video released by? Columbia TriStar Columbia TriStar
Category you'd most likely find this under in your video store? Romantic Comedy Romantic Comedy
Baldwin brother? William Stephen
Brunette actress who got her start on Twin Peaks? Sherilyn Fenn
played Laura Palmer's rival, Audrey Horne Lara Flyn Boyle
played Laura Palmer's best friend, Donna Heyward
Forgotten third? Kelly Lynch Josh Charles
Love triangle involving a girl, a guy, and a bi? Girl loves Bi. Guy loves Bi.
Bi used to love Girl, may now love Guy Guy wants Girl, who want Bi,
who wants Guy, who wants... etc.
Plot? When her lover Ellen (Fenn) announces she's
leaving, Connie (Lynch) goes into an emotional tailspin. Desperate to win Ellen back, she hires a suave, professional gigolo named Joe (Baldwin) to woo Ellen, break her heart and, if all goes according to plan, send her running back to Connie's sympathetic arms. But when Joe's false attention begins to look like the real thing, Connie carefully arranged romantic triangle come apart at the seams! From the moment she's accidentally assigned to a male dorm room, aspiring actress Alex (Boyle) brings a sexual charge to the lives of Stuart (Baldwin) and Eddy (Charles). Campus stud Stuart tries to seduce her, only to learn that she's attracted to introspective Eddy. But Eddy has hidden desires of his own, which inspire some serious - and seriously funny - sexual explorations.
1-2-3 tag line? Three Wild Hearts. One Sexy Romantic Comedy. One Girl. Two Guys. Three Possibilities.
Better than that Three To Tango movie with Matthew Perry and Neve Campbell? Yes. Yes.
Steamy hetero love scene? One. Several - although I'm not sure any
of them qualify as steamy
Steamy homoerotic love scene? Unfortunately, no. Are you kidding?!? Not in Hollywood.
Degree of plausibility? Slim. The number of gigolos who look like Billy Baldwin equals the number of streetwalkers who look like Julia Roberts. Even less. College boards usually use more than a first name to determine the gender of its students.
How old are these people supposed to be? Ellen teaches at a college. Alex attends college.
Running Length? 101 minutes 93 minutes
Improbable ending? The lesbian and the gigolo live happily (and platonically) ever after. Europeans are rumored to have gotten a different ending. After the inevitable menage a trois, the three slowly drift apart without any awkwardness or regrets.

	THREE OF HEARTS	THREESOME
Year?	1993	1994
MPAA Rating?	R	R
Video released by?	Columbia TriStar	Columbia TriStar
Category you'd most likely find this under in your video store?	Romantic Comedy	Romantic Comedy
Baldwin brother?	William	Stephen
*Brunette actress who got her start on Twin Peaks?*	Sherilyn Fenn played Laura Palmer's rival, Audrey Horne	Lara Flyn Boyle played Laura Palmer's best friend, Donna Heyward
Forgotten third?	Kelly Lynch	Josh Charles
Love triangle involving a girl, a guy, and a bi?	Girl loves Bi. Guy loves Bi. Bi used to love Girl, may now love Guy	Guy wants Girl, who want Bi, who wants Guy, who wants... etc.
Plot?	When her lover Ellen (Fenn) announces she's leaving, Connie (Lynch) goes into an emotional tailspin. Desperate to win Ellen back, she hires a suave, professional gigolo named Joe (Baldwin) to woo Ellen, break her heart and, if all goes according to plan, send her running back to Connie's sympathetic arms. But when Joe's false attention begins to look like the real thing, Connie carefully arranged romantic triangle come apart at the seams!	From the moment she's accidentally assigned to a male dorm room, aspiring actress Alex (Boyle) brings a sexual charge to the lives of Stuart (Baldwin) and Eddy (Charles). Campus stud Stuart tries to seduce her, only to learn that she's attracted to introspective Eddy. But Eddy has hidden desires of his own, which inspire some serious - and seriously funny - sexual explorations.
1-2-3 tag line?	Three Wild Hearts. One Sexy Romantic Comedy.	One Girl. Two Guys. Three Possibilities.
*Better than that Three To Tango* movie with Matthew Perry and Neve Campbell?**	Yes.	Yes.
Steamy hetero love scene?	One.	Several - although I'm not sure any of them qualify as steamy
Steamy homoerotic love scene?	Unfortunately, no.	Are you kidding?!? Not in Hollywood.
Degree of plausibility?	Slim. The number of gigolos who look like Billy Baldwin equals the number of streetwalkers who look like Julia Roberts.	Even less. College boards usually use more than a first name to determine the gender of its students.
How old are these people supposed to be?	Ellen teaches at a college.	Alex attends college.
Running Length?	101 minutes	93 minutes
Improbable ending?	The lesbian and the gigolo live happily (and platonically) ever after. Europeans are rumored to have gotten a different ending.	After the inevitable menage a trois, the three slowly drift apart without any awkwardness or regrets.