and his Existentialist World

Be Well. Live Well. Laugh Often. Love Much. Carpe Diem. This homepage doesn't contain WOW stuff. It is a JUMPSTATION to my real and living world.

I am Mike Ho. My real name is Mike Dumlao. My full name is Michelangelo Urrete Dumlao. I am Mike since January 24, 1974 from Manila, Philippines. The eldest of five brothers.

What can I say...hmmmm, let me see? I am an existentialist. I am not religious nor ritualistic. But, I am categorically spiritual. I have fears but I am not afraid of them as they make me confident. Being afraid at times is perfectly cool, it is a manifestation that you can feel things. Consider me as a reverse pessimist creating a mental picture of the worst but crossing my fingers and hoping for the best. Doing things right the first time energizes my self-esteem. I want to get the things I want, like and need (and not necessarily in this order, there's a big diff between the three!) as fast as I can without sacrificing time. If I cannot accomplish my tasks fast enough, I'll still try to do things as fast and as sure as I can. Don't get me wrong, I am also vulnerable, gullible, moody and paranoid at times (read: I make mistakes too!); I also swallow my pride - the only poison best consumed when swallowed.

I am a social butterfly. Loves dancing. Loves to party, drink and smoke. Lately I am trying to explore the joys of living a healthy and wholesome life by spending more time in the gym or swimming or snorkeling or sleeping more (Duh?). New Age and Crystals fascinate me. Numerology and Astrology intrigue me. Red Hot Chili Peppers, Brand New Heavies, Jamiroquai and Santana's Smooth move me. Sleepless in Seattle makes me cry.

Searching for my soulmate is the reason for my existence and Shopping is a passion. Clothes are extension of my soul. I have developed a taste for the finer things in life and a talent in hunting vintage gears at mint condition for ten pesos a piece! But I'd rather be naked than die in this lifetime without kissing my soulmate.

Can I Tell You Who I Really Am?

If I exposed my nakedness, would you not let me feel shame?
If I open up my soul, can I trust you to listen?
I am lurking within this dark reality, compelled to camouflage authenticity,
Because of fear of what this mind tells me, that you may not like the real me.

But if a true friend is living inside of you, ready to accept the person within me,
Understand that inside of me, you can’t find a fixed, true and real entity.
A being in person is a being in process, constantly changing, swiftly moving,
What I am today, my thoughts and feelings, may not be the same tomorrow.

However I feel the need to be understood, even just by you and you alone,
To help me find and live my full life, developed into what I was created to be.

Last Updated: Summer of 1998
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