An
opening we would all like to see
A beach on the French Riveria. A high overhead shot that quickly zooms into a small beach
cottage.
A pair of long nude legs are just visible
along the ocean side of the cottage. We
hear a tiny hiss and then the legs are pulled out of sight.
Scene 2
Cut to an interior shot.
A man with a black bag over his head is standing there, in what looks
like a lab. His hands tied behind
his back and his shirt is in shreds.
We hear the crack of a whip and a bloody
gash appears on his back, slashing away more of his shirt.
“Where is she Mr. Smith?” a voice says.
“Where
is who?” the man says trying to maintain his composure, but we can see his
pain is pretty extreme.
“You know Mr. Smith.
The woman you were to be meeting for lunch today.”
“I wasn’t meeting a woman for lunch
today.”
“Stop it Mr. Smith.
We monitored your phone call this morning and even thought it was
scrambled, we could still trace it. We
found both you and your associate, unfortunately we lost her in a crowd.”
“I don’t know what you are talking about.”, the man says.
We heard another crack as the screen go
black.
Scene 3
A woman flanked by bodyguards walks into
the lab. She is wearing only a
two-piece swimsuit and is carrying a small bag with a towel and beach cover-up
in it.
“Oh, Honey what are you doing to this one.
He looks too good to beat to death, you should have left me have him.
I wouldn’t have left a mark on him.”, she says running her hand over
his partial bared chest.
“I’m sorry, Sweetie.
I know you’d like to have worked him over, but you were out on the
beach when we caught him and I was hoping to have the information before you
came in.”, he reaches over and kisses her.
“He still hasn’t said much, maybe you
would like a chance with him.”, he continues.
“Oh, he is still holding out. Why I thought a pretty boy like this, would have given in
along time ago.”, she says holding the man’s bloody and swollen face by the
chin in her hand and tilting it side to side admiring his movie star like looks.
“I accept your challenge, I always liked a little family rivalry.”
The woman’s brother motions to her
bodyguards to leave.
She walks to a small cabinet on wheels near
where held man is. He is still
standing, but only because of the surgical steel frame standing behind him.
She opens the draw and takes out a long
smooth wire. She pokes her finger,
it bleeds. “Mr. Smith, you are going to wish you had talked to my brother.”
“Leave us, Robert...
I’ll call you when I’m finished.”
She pulls the man’s pants down and starts
on his underwear. The screen fades
to black
Scene 4
Robert is sitting by the pool, when his
cell phone ring. He answers it.
“I’m surprised you gave up so
quickly.”
“Oh.” He says a bit shocked.
“I’m impressed with your understanding
of how to influence men. Or is he
still a man?”, Robert laughs a bit at the thought of the tough British agent
losing his sex appeal.
“ I’ll be right down.”, he continues.
Scene 5
Robert descends the last short set of
stairs into the lab.
He walks into the lab and sees the empty
steel frame where the man had been. He turns, wondering where she has taken him.
He sees his sister standing there. We
hear a crack and then the screen fades to black. (Shot from his perspective.)
Scene 6
A long shot looking out over the ocean
from the house.
The two of them are walking down to the boat
deck just up the beach from where Lisa had been sunning herself less than an
hour before.
“Robert and I are going for a short ride.
Make sure you clean up the mess in the lab while we are gone.
We have a meeting with Mr. Smith’s friend.”
The guards cast off the mooring lines, as
Lisa maneuvers the boat away from the dock.
Robert’s right hand man calls to his
second. “Time to take care of the
mess. Carl.”
The boat speeds out to the open seas.
Scene 7
A set of glazed eyes fill the screen in
a very tight shot. As the camera
pulls backs, we see Robert lying there motion-less, just as the guards arrive.
Scene 8
Back on the boat, Robert reaches into his shirt and pull upwards, typical in a mask removal scene. His face peels away relieving the British agent’s face.
He looks strangely familiar and looks less beaten that he did back in the lab.
(Remember this is Hollywood and the star is getting ready for his close up.)
He leans over and kisses the still bikini
clad women with him. “Bond, James
Bond.”
The camera starts a pull back and the Bond
theme starts, then stops.
Scene 9
She pushes him back and he falls to the
deck. Lying there, he sees the
young woman reach behind her neck as if she was going to remove the tiny gold
necklace she was wearing. (Cut
to his vantage point.)
She pulls both arms forward and her face
distorts as she does. Her blond
tresses fall forward over the top of her head.
A familiar looking face peeks back at him
over her breasts barely visible beneath the mass of rubbery flesh and hair.
“Bond, Derma Bond… I have always liked a
little family rivalry, James” He turns and continues to pilot the boat towards
the distance shoreline.
James Bond lays there, his mouth, still
open, in shock.
Cut to the theme song. (Not sure if it should be the Bond or the MI theme.)
© 2001
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