Written by: S. Wilhelmina Feenster
NOTE: Each scene is a different storyline.
Scene 1 - Abandoned Gabrielle
Bo had to work late at the station with Jessica and Natalie's DNA results, so Gabrielle said she'd be waiting for him in bed with a good romance novel. Bo didn't come home for 12 days.
Gabrielle sat in the bed all alone, wearing one of Bo's shirts, and reading a diary she kept of her and Max's steamy romance. She had already read several romance novels and was quite bored.
Gabrielle: [laughs] I remember doing that. Oh, he liked that...[grins with delight] As did I. [looks around] I'm glad Bo isn't here. He'd probably think I was crazy talking to myself.
There was a knock at the door. Gabrielle got up, thinking it was Bo returning to her. She fixed her hair and answered the door.
Max: [smiles] Hi, Gabrielle.
Gabrielle: Max, I'm busy right now.
Max: It's about Al. I'm worried about him.
Gabrielle: You're worried?
Max: Yeah.
Gabrielle: Could you come back another time? [closes the door but he stops it with his hand]
Max: I'm not going anywhere. [walks into the apartment; Gabby is a bit peeved]
Gabrielle: What's the matter with Al?
Max: [thinking to himself] Why is she wearing that brown shirt? And her hair is so...
Gabrielle: Well?
Max: Are you okay?
Gabrielle: I'm fine. Is Al alright?
Max: Yeah. Thanks for asking.
Gabrielle: [irritated] You said there was something wrong.
Max: [smiles] I lied.
Gabrielle: Oh, what else is new?
Max: [notices her diary lying on the couch] What's this? [grabs it] It's a diary about us.
Gabrielle: Yes. [snatches it away] And it's very private.
Max: Were you reading it?
Gabrielle: That's absolutely no concern of yours.
Max: You were reading it. Gabrielle, you can lie to everyone in this town, but you can't lie to me. I can see right through you.
Gabrielle: Why are you here?
Max: I've been thinking about you lately.
Gabrielle: Oh? Have you been reading my style articles?
Max: Yes, actually. They're really good.
Gabrielle: Is that all?
Max: No. Answer me one question.
Gabrielle: What?
Max: Why were you reading about us? [silence] You still love me, don't you?
Gabrielle: No. I love Bo.
Max: Liar. [knock at the door]
Gabrielle: [walks to the door] I want you to leave.
Max: [thinking to himself] This reverse psychology is not working at all. [Gabs answers the door]
Gabrielle: [smiling] Al.
Al: Mom, I need to talk to you.
Gabrielle: Sure, sweetheart. Come in. [stern look at Max] Shouldn't you be leaving?
Max: He's my son, too, Gabrielle.
Gabrielle: Yeah, but he came to see me, not you.
Al: Mom, it's okay. He can stay.
Max: You see, Gabrielle? My son wants me to stay.
Gabrielle: Okay, then stay.
Max: [looks at his watch] Al, I'll have talk to you later.
Al: No, don't go. I'd like to tell you both.
Gabrielle: What is it, sweetheart?
Al: I'm in love with Jen Rappaport...
Max: We already know this, son.
Al: No, dad. You don't understand! [vein in neck pops out]
Gabrielle: What are you trying to tell us?
Al: I'm in love with Lindsay Rappaport, okay?!
Max: Jen's mom?
Al: Yeah.
Gabrielle: Al, why her?
Al: Because she understands what I'm going through.
Gabrielle: What's this? [grabs a diary that's in Al's hands] Is this yours?
Al: No. It's Marcie's. [knock at the door]
Max: [opens door] Well, speak of the devil.
Lindsay: Hi, Max. Looks like you have the whole family here.
Gabrielle dropped the diary on the floor. It landed right next to her and Max's.
Lindsay: I guess you know about me and Al, huh?
Gabrielle: [holding back her tears] Yes.
Lindsay: Oh. [picks up the diary] You dropped this.
Al: [takes it] It's mine.
Lindsay: I'm going back out to the car. [to Al] Could you hurry this along? I have a few places I need to be. [leaves]
Al: Well, I better go.
Gabrielle: [tears] Al, don't do this.
Al: Bye, mom. Dad. [leaves]
Gabrielle: Do me a favor, Max.
Max: [thinking to himself] I can't wait to get her out of that shirt and into one of mine. [to Gabrielle] What?
Gabrielle: Get out. I want to be left alone.
Max: [thinking to himself] Her british accent is driving me wild.
Gabrielle: I'm Argentinian.
Max: [puzzled] Well, I'll go, but before I do--[kisses her] Goodbye, Gabrielle.
Gabrielle went to bed.
Three days later...
Gabrielle was walking through Llanview and stopped at the newspaper stand. She noticed "The Sun" read, 'Diary Makes Hot Seller.' She picked it up and read through it.
Gabrielle: Oh, my, God. [looks up from paper] It's my diary.
Gabrielle ran back to the apartment and got out what she thought was her diary. Flipping through the diary, she realized that it was the one Al had.
Gabrielle: Who would do something like this?
Nora: It looks like you've been dooped by Lindsay.
Gabrielle: How did you get in here?
Nora: You left your door open. Uh, I read your little diary. It seems to be a best seller. Right up there with "Lorelei's Diary." What I'm wondering is, what you did to Lindsay to make her so mad?
Gabrielle: I haven't done anything to Lindsay.
Nora: Yeah, that's what they all say.
Gabrielle: [glaring at her] Don't you have someone else to bother?
Nora: If you call it that. I'm here to see your roommate.
Gabrielle: Bo?
Nora: Do you have others?
Gabrielle: Why?
Nora: I just need to talk to him.
Gabrielle: He's out.
Nora: Oh. Well, I guess I can come back later.
Gabrielle: I don't think that will necessary.
Nora: And why not?
Gabrielle: Because I will be here.
Nora: Well, yeah, I mean, you're his roommate.
Gabrielle: Nora, let me inform you about something. Bo is not just my roommate. We are together now--as in boyfriend and girlfriend.
Nora: Oh. This comes as a shock.
Gabrielle: Oh, really? How so?
Nora: He's a commissioner of police and you're a con artist. It's not exactly a match made in heaven.
Gabrielle: Hmm. I see. And I take it your relationship with Bo was, as you said, a match made in heaven.
Nora: Well---
Gabrielle: Nora, I didn't sleep with another man, get pregnant, and pass it off as my husband's child.
Nora: Well, I'm not the type of person who lies about a baby being dead.
Gabrielle: That was not my fault. It was Todd.
Nora: Come on, Gabrielle. You and Bo come from two different worlds. Do you really think you two were meant to be soulmates? You know, I think you'd be better off with Max.
Gabrielle: And I think you should mind your own bloody buisness. [opens door] Now leave.
Nora: In the end, I will win back Bo and you'll be alone.
Gabrielle: Hold it!
Nora: What?
Gabrielle: I forgot to give you something. Just a minute. [goes into the kitchen and comes out with a banana cream pie and a mug of beer] I realized that I have been a terrible hostess. So, here. Call it a piece offering.
Nora: Thank y---[Gabs let her have it with the pie]
Gabrielle: [grinning] Oh,no, Nora--thank you. Here, this should cool you off. [poured the beer over Nora's head] No one messes with Gabrielle Medina and goes away empty handed. [slams the door in Nora's face]
Gabrielle blissfully returned to the bedroom where she started reading Harry Potter books.
Scene 2 - Disco Inferno
Most recently, Max and Asa had a plan to rid themselves of their current wives. Asa would woo Roxy and Max would do the same with Rae. Asa did indeed win Roxy over, but now it's Max's turn. Can he do it?
INT. Disco Boogie Club
The lights were low and the disco ball was shimmering throughout the room. "I Will Survive" played in the background. Asa and Roxy stepped into the room. Max had already gotten Rae drunk and on the dance floor.
Roxy: Nice place you got here. You say you have slots?
Asa: And a bar full of drinks.
Roxy: [smiles] I like that. I don't know about you, but I want to hit the bar before I play the slots.
Asa: Good idea. [sees Max and Rae renacting moves from 'Saturday Night Fever'] That's right, boy. Get that she-devil out of my life for good. [cell phone rings] Asa Buchanan.
Lindsay: Hello, Asa.
Asa: Who is this?
Lindsay: You know who this is. I'm your ex-daughter-in-law's worst nightmare.
Asa: Lindsay?
Lindsay: You got it.
Asa: What the hell do you want?
Lindsay: I want you to pay.
Asa: For what?
Lindsay: For my daughter's miscarriage.
Asa: You mean that no good tramp of yours Jen?
Lindsay: I don't care for your choice of words, but yes.
Asa: I had nothing to do with that.
Lindsay: Yes, you did.
Asa: Listen, woman, I'm about to hang up on you!
Lindsay: You're scared. Good. You should be. It's all your fault.
Asa: I'm not buying into your psychotic mind games.
Lindsay: This is no mind game, Asa. You had a lot to do with Jen's misacarriage.
Asa: I'm not listening to this anymore.
Lindsay: How about the commissioner?
Asa: Bo?
Lindsay: That's right.
Asa: How is that my fault?
Lindsay: Well, he's your son. He used to be married to Nora.
Asa: That has nothing to do with you.
Lindsay: That has everything to do with me. You see, Asa, if Bo would have forgiven Nora for sleeping with Sam, then Nora wouldn't have taken every man that had ever loved me and I'd be with Troy MacIver now. Not Nora. And I would have never went to prison. I could have been there for my daughter when she needed me. So, does that answer your question, Asa? [silence] Hello? Asa?
Roxy: Sorry, honey. Asa had to go check my slots.
Lindsay: Huh? Who is this?
Roxy: It's the one and only Roxy Holden. I'm married to a real stud. If you know what I mean.
Lindsay: Well, you know what, Roxy?
Roxy: What?
Lindsay: You're the reason Jen miscarried. I blame you.
Roxy: Your bimbo barbie was pregnant?
Lindsay: Jen lost the baby because of your daughter, Natalie.
Roxy: She ain't my daughter.
Lindsay: You should have never let her come to Llanview.
Roxy: Why the hell would I care what she did?
Lindsay: That girl is bad news.
Roxy: Hey, Lindsay. I couldn't agree with you more. She's a lot like her Uncle Commish.
Lindsay: You just keep her away from my daughter.
Roxy: Sure, Linda. Whatever you say.
Lindsay: Lindsay.
Roxy: Yeah, her, too. You know what you need? A good stiff drink. ["You Should Be Dancing" plays] Excuse me. That's my cue to go dance with my friend. [walks over to Asa] Hey, Asa, the Bee Gees want us out there dancing.
Asa: Just a minute, honey. [talks to a man sporting a huge afro] You know what to do. [turns to Roxy] Now where were we?
Roxy: About to get down and boogie.
Asa: Let's dance.
[Commercial Break]
Jen sat in Cristian's loft trying to open Marcie's diary. She jabbed her hair pin in the lock and got her finger nail caught and broke it.
Jen: Damn! How can I be perfect for Cristian with a broken nail?
Mitch: I'm glad you asked.
Jen: Who are you?
Mitch: A friend.
Jen: Did you bring me acrylics?
Mitch: No.
Jen: Then why are you here? Are you stalking me?
Mitch: I've come to send you a message.
Jen: What?
Mitch: Heed the messanger.
Jen: How is that supposed to help my nail? Go away!
Mitch: You will not know the day or the hour, but that nail of yours will grow back. [smirks]
Jen: Are you serious?
Mitch: I don't lie, Jen.
Jen: How do you know my name?
Mitch: Heed the messanger. [disappears]
This message brought to you by the Mitch Laurence cult of Llanview, Pennsylvania.
[End of commercial]
"You should be dancin', yeah..."
Roxy: Whoo! [laughs] You're not a bad dancer.
Asa: You ready?
Roxy: [confused] For what?
Asa: For this. [dips her]
Roxy: Aaaaaaah!!!
Max looked over at Asa and Roxy when he dipped her.
Max: [thinking to himself] That brings back great memories. [pictures himself dipping Gabrielle like he used to]
Rae: [slurring speech] Did you know that I'm not really a therapisssst? [laughs] Therapissst. Isn't that a funny word?
Max: I'm in stitches, Gretel.
The man with the huge afro began snapping pictures at Max and Rae.
Max: Smile for the camera, honey. You're going to help daddy get into divorce court.
The man motioned for him to kiss Rae, but he shook his head. Then he thought of an eternal commitment with Roxeanne Holden and kissed Rae. As he leaned in to kiss her, she saw Asa and moved far away from Max.
Rae: That's my husband.
Max: No, you're husband isn't here.
Rae: He's right over there.
Max: Nope. Not him.
Rae: But--
Max: You have me now. Aren't we having fun?
Rae: No--I've been here for several hours now and not once have we done 'The Electric Slide.'
Max: Is that all?
['The Electric Slide' plays]
Max took Rae and they did the electric slide. Roxy watched and asked Asa to join in and he did so, reluctantly. Asa moved towards Max and got close to him.
Asa: Our plan is workin', boy.
The lights came on.
Bo: Police! This party is over.
Asa: Bo, we're not doing anything illegal.
Bo: Not according to this gentleman.
Gus Aitoro: [shows police badge] Sorry, buddy. Springfield P.D. You were doing some illegal gambling here. Okay, my partner is going to read you your rights. [to Asa] You be nice to her. I mean that.
Asa: Oh, the hell with all of you.
Harley Cooper: [slaps cuffs on him] You have the right to remain silent...
Bo Brady and Billie Reed entered the establishment unaware it was the wrong scene.
Bo Brady: Freeze! Police!
Billie Reed: This is a police raid! You are all under arrest.
Gus: [to Bo] How many people knew about this?
Bo Brady: Drop your weapons and line up here. I want to know which one of you bastards hurt my wife.
Gus: Frank, why don't you cuff the blonde and I'll take care of this misunderstanding.
Frank Cooper: All right.
Gus: [approaches them] Can we take this outside? Please? [they go outside]
Bo: Come on, pa. We'll talk about this downtown.
Asa: Just tell me why these clowns are with you. Especially this feisty blonde.
Frank: Hey, watch it. That's my sister.
Asa: I don't give a damn---
Bo: Do me a favor and shut up, pa!
Gus came back inside and walked over to Harley.
Gus: Hey, Coop.
Harley: What happened? Who was that?
Gus: It was nothing. Some guy gave them a phoney tip.
Harley: Oh. They seemed really upset.
Gus: Yeah, apparently this guy is causing trouble in Salem.
Harley: Hmm. I wonder why the guy chose Springfield?
As this storyline ended, the police cars lit up their lights and their sirens screamed away. Out from behind a bushes crept the immoral being, known as, Mitch Laurence.
Mitch: [laughs] I'll kill every last Buchanan if it's the last thing I do. Especially---Bo.
Gabrielle: [attacking him] Like bloody hell you will. You are about to receive the wrath of Gabrielle Medina. And I got to tell you, it isn't pretty.
Mitch: Am I supposed to be scared by your unveiled threats?
Gabrielle: Oh, I'll carry it out.
Mitch: [smiles] You're pretty. I'd hate to see that face get harmed in, let's say, an accidental fire or an explosion.
Gabrielle: You truely are a mad man.
Mitch: Only to the people who judge.
Gabrielle: You leave Bo alone.
Mitch: I could have your son meet the same fate as a lot of my followers did.
Gabrielle: Don't you touch my son.
Mitch: Good kid. You know, break failer can lead to untimely circumstances. Heed the messanger.
Gabrielle: That's it. You've gone too far. [lifts her leg up, hits him in the face and knocks him down] Heed that, you bloody bastard.
Mitch laid motionless on the sidewalk. Bo came out of the disco club and saw Gabrielle in tears.
Bo: What happened?
Gabrielle: Mitch threatened to kill you and Al. I couldn't let him get away. He wanted to kill me, too.
Bo: We're going to arrest him and you need to come down to the station for questioning. [kisses her; craddles her face with his hands] I won't let Mitch hurt anyone I love ever again. [wipes away her tears]
Gabrielle: What did you say?
Bo: You're safe now. I'm going to arrest Mitch.
Gabrielle: No, after that.
Bo: [grinning] Oh, the 'I love you' part. Uh, I guess I never told you that before.
Gabrielle: [eyes beaming with joy] No, you haven't.
Bo: Well, I do.
Gabrielle: [looking in his eyes] Say it again.
Bo: I love you, Gabrielle. I love you.
Gabrielle: I love you, too. [kisses him]
They went to the station and put Mitch away for a long time. After that, they returned to their apartment where they made love and celebrated their new beginning.
The End