<BGSOUND src="//www.oocities.org/medusa_rages/Brick.mid">

An update on my life (15/2/04)

Since I last updated this website alot of crap has happened to me....after reducing my medication for around 4 months, the inevitable happened even though I increased my antidepressent dossage. Around Christmas I started cutting again. Only on the wrist and only on my left hand. I now have two miserable scars on my left wrist which I try hiding with a watch. My parents know about the first time I cut last year, but they don't know about the recent ones..... I threw away my razors, but then I found a pair of sissors which I cut myself with.

Though my mind is insane. I am not going to break I am not normal Normality is rubbish Don't cry for no tears can bring back the lost Poor girl, No music can help her now

I am hearing voices again, as I reduced my medication a while ago, and this time I can't differentiate the real ones from the false and this time only at night. Again I think I"m being stalked. I've thought about suicide as I"m becoming depressed again, and thought of buying some sleeping pills to overdose on, but my mum caught me trying to buy them and stopped me.

II was sent to hospital to see a doctor when I complained that I was feeling numb. It was the same sensation one feels when they are about to faint. (I have fainted many times before when I was anorexic so I know how it feels like.)He said to just keep going with my medication. Hopefully things will get better.

I'm hoping the scars will fade and I"ll return back to normal, even though I'm not exactly sure how it feels like to be normal......