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Update for 18/11/04
Mantra for today..........
Well well well, I hope to get well.
Hi there, MADelaine here. Just came back from a trip to Portugal, Spain and France. More like a pilgrimage actually. Bought lots of stuff though.
Before I left I did get a bit of a breakdown. If you can get a "bit" of a breakdown.
The trip went just fine though I had to take more medication before I left....
But when I came back I decided that I'll study theology  for about a year, while continueing with my volunteer work in my former university. It'll be work experience for about half a year then I'll look for a part time job afterwards. I do  hope and pray that I'm not taking too much on as you know, schizophrenia and depression can be triggered by !!!!stress!!!! which I'm very acceptible to. SIGH> Still hearing those damn voices. But must keep being optimistic!!! very important it is to look for that silver lining in that cloud up there somewhere.
off to neverland!
TODAY IS THE GREATEST DAY
Preparing for christmas now. What I"m hoping is that people who want to give me presents (namely family), would instead donate to Doctors without frontiers or something like that. They are a group of doctors who work for free and go to war torn areas like IRAQ.......I pray for peace. But that's all I can do. I don't know how people can kill each other. BTW my depression has left me almost completely. I've been scar free for about 2 months now....the scarring was triggered by a halucination that my voices were telling me to kill myself, which I didn't want to do, so instead I cut. I haven't been cutting for a long time now, THANKYOU GOD!!!! Also I've joined this youth group in church and they are promoting this thing called gawad kalinga www.gawadkalinga.org which is a program that builds houses for the poor in places like the philipines....africa.....etc...........
Things to do today....
Be excellent to one another.
Set standards and live up to them.
Do one good thing for someone (a stranger perhaps?)
Love yourself
Learn something new
Eat something you haven't tasted before
Help someone in need (time? a caring hand? your prayers?)
Avoid reading gossip magazines
Look at the night sky and know you are looking at the same Moon that shone down on the greatest people that had ever lived, and the poorest, the lowliest and the unknown heroes that spread the seed of peace,  hope or love to those around them........
Be someone you will look up to.
follow the yellow brick road.....
I follow the night
Can't stand the light
One day I"ll fly away
leave all this to yesterday
What can you do for me?
What can your love do to me?
home sweet home
Listening to Avril Lavigne and Blink 182........love their talent. Wish I could write music myself.