| Zoodessa Page 4 |
| Back Cover Feature Of Joy: An Article! |
| Mother Nature Glad Someone's Having Fun By Master Justin |
| TERRA—Mother Nature, the all-seeing, all-knowing nature deity, has come forth with a rather sarcastic press release that in effect states that “I don’t suppose anything like natural conservation, fair treatment, or anything else I put you here for matters to you animals. I mean, it’s not like I slave away trying to keep the world environment in balance while you waste away living out your short pointless lives. Gee, I’m glad someone’s having fun, or all this might be a waste!” Mother Nature refers to the way many of her children have spat on her, shat on her, and disrespected her in favor of doing things like eating and mating. Mother Nature would prefer that she get some help in conserving the environment, but all anyone does is try to destroy it. “This is a baseless argument,” said White House spokesman Ari Fleisher, representing the humans. “Eating and mating are natural parts of our lives. Especially the mating.” The horse population responded by shuddering, neighing, and fertilizing the earth. The dog population responded by licking themselves and humping trees. The bovine population responded by chewing their cud and getting killed by human farmers. The squirrel population responded by taking over the world. “This is not what I had in mind, people!” the annoyed Mother Nature said to her children. “Just wait till your father gets home!” |
| STAFF AND THINGS LIKE THAT Master Justin--Editor In Chief Baron Vince--Copy Editor Baron Ziegfeld--Assistant Editor Ludwig--Editor Editor Kou Cao--Very Special Editor The Experts--Gatherers of Knowledge Father O'Fondlin--Was Eventually Sued By 8 Altar Boys And Their Families |
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| Special Thanks: This Guy: |
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