| Birth RATING: PG-13 By: Skylark |
| Disclaimer: Don't own, but sometimes I wish I did. |
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| Before, I was in hell
The screams would keep me up at night Then I realized the screams were my own There was nothing but pain and blood Nothing but a cold hard ground and sharp needles As time dragged on, days marked by doctors and clinics I began to pray for death, for anything Just take me away from this place, please God, please The devil in my mind began to whisper to me “Just give in to them, just tell them what they want Maybe then will they let you live” Every day was a battle I was slowly losing I slid closer and closer to breaking Forgetting everything I was, everything I am Giving in to the devil in my mind that laughed in glee “It’s so much easier to tell them what they want Let go, give in, nothing to lose and everything to gain” Except I would lose everything and gain nothing I would lose myself and gain my life Vomit dripping down my chin, so close to breaking I was dragged a final time to the clinic Twin trails of blood trailed behind my feet The pain so familiar it was easy not to notice When we passed an open door And the scent of roses caressed me on the wind Time froze, I turned my weakened head towards the door A man, once handsome, kneeling in rich earth Digging around the roots of the roses My eyes closed, and memories washed over me Roses in the window box, the wind blowing the scent in Soft blooms gracing the table on an anniversary Making love with velvet petals under flushed bodies Sweet kisses shared with dark earth on our hands As I breathed in the scent of those rich flowers Brought to me on a breath of fresh air My eyes flew open when I was thrown on cold hard ground And they asked me for names, demanded to know But the feel of wind still caressed my face And the scent of roses still filled my head I would not break, I would not give my last inch I may die, but now I remember who I am My name is Valerie Now, I am free *** Before, I was nothing There was no past, no future Only nows marked by pain Another prick of a needle, another wish for death The others around me slowly disappeared I felt fierce resentment that they could die And I was cursed to live One day, the pain lessened, the beatings stopped I heard them say I was one of the last They humored my wishes, now concerned about my health Allowed me outside with the garden Providing all I could possible need Oh, what fools these mortals be I don’t know how I knew what to do Which chemicals would do what I want I had knowledge but no memory But I was grateful for what I knew The blast threw me back Fiery fingers ripped at my flesh The roar of the flames drowned my screams Agony, suffering, nothing can describe it Yet death, the cruel master, alluded me still I stepped over rubble, the fire licking at my feet And suddenly, the pain didn’t matter anymore The walls were down, being burned away Everything they had worked for was destroyed All that they created from me was no more The fire burned away all of my shackles I saw the woman doctor who stole everything from me And lifted my arms in defiance I roared with the realization that I was free I would right all of the wrongs they had caused As the fire continued to burn I still have no past except those marked by pain But now I have a future, a destiny I am the one known as V Now, I am free *** Before, I was a Party Member Worked my way towards the top I was in control because I was good I could see patterns nobody else saw But when things started to go wrong The pattern began to pain a picture I was afraid to see First there were deaths and roses Pieces that didn’t make sense Lies, deceits, threats And something about a center no one remembers A struggle between political alliance and evidence Raged within my head A desperate need to know the truth, no more lies Then there were red diaries, a meeting with a stranger I felt as if I teetered on the edge of the rest of my life Finally, I returned to the beginning I had to know the truth I couldn’t stand the lies anymore It was late and dark, only the moon lighting the way Looming on a hill, the ruins of a detention center The walls blown away long ago But vines were reaching up, trying to hide what had been The earth itself trying to erase the evil once here I walked along paths overgrown with weeds And I saw sections of earth where no grass grew Too many chemicals in the dirt to contain a virus Held within the bodies of the mass grave The scar on the earth the last remaining testament To all of those buried beneath Suddenly I knew the red diary was real And the dark stranger had spoken truth The pieces finally fell into place I could see the pattern no one else wanted to see I fell to my knees and touched the dead earth I could not allow these horrors to continue I knew what had to be done Wrongs must be righted I am Eric Finch Now, I am free *** Before, I was weak Afraid to walk out alone at night Scared of my own shadow creeping beside me Terrified of alleys monsters could hide in I lived in a constant bubble Hoping no one would notice the little woman Who always kept her head down and toe in line I never did anything wrong, nothing worth notice I moved through life without living But I was safe, safe in my life I didn’t want to live Then things changed, I became wanted and hunted I took chances and risked my life I betrayed my captor, endangered my friend Desperate to find my safe bubble again But I could not escape them, thrown into hell And safety became a lost memory Minutes passed by like years As I laid upon the cold hard ground The fresh wounds of torture painting the floor Suffering was a constant companion Until I felt my sanity slowly slipping away I knew God had forsaken me The end was coming near and I didn’t care Then a miracle, straight from above Helped me grasp the last strand of sanity “My name is Valerie…” Defiance flared in my soul I looked in death’s eyes and laughed But it was a lie, all a lie Pain and suffering by one I trusted I felt my sanity leaving again Quicker than water through grasping fingers Everything cracking around me Next I knew, the rain caressed my cheek The drops softly whispering to me I don’t know you, but I love you God is in the rain I raised my arms up, my face turned to the sky Blessed water mixing with tears of joy Baptizing me as a woman who no longer feared My name is Evey Now, I am free |
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