Hermione's No Good Very Bad Day
by American Hermione's Twin Brother
The sun was shining brightly that day (though it shouldn't have been); the day that Hermione's life was changed forever. She never expected it to be this way as she sat their on the floor crying out loud, while mumbling things in Japenese. She had just learned the language and was continuing to use it everywhere she went. But this is the present, let's backtrack a little.
It all started that very morning in the Great Hall, where Hermione entered, looking like a wreck, while carrying a package wrapped in a bow. Harry and Ron, sitting patiently at the Gryffindor table, noticed her as she stumbled up, looking aggravated at the slightest movement.
"What's wrong, Hermione? What's in the package?" Ron asked, hoping she wasn't mad at him.
"Nothing is wrong, Ron. I just need to eat something. Oh, and I baked a cake. It's for my Muggle Studies Class. That's what's in the package." As she finished the sentence, a bowl of grits along with a scrambled eggs appeared in front of her. Taking the package, she untied the the bow. Opening it up, she looked inside, realizing that she had switched the boxes by mistake. Instead of a nice cake, there lay the brand new underwear her mother had sent her on her birthday. Quickly wrapping it up, she pushed it to the side, and started to eat.
As she was shoving the last bite of grits in her mouth, the room started to fill with owls. Approximately thirty owls entered the room, each carrying things from letters to packages. A large snowy owl, heading towards Hermione, was carrying a small sized package. Hermione, unaware of the incoming owl, bent over to take a drink of her orange juice when the package dropped, landing right in her grits, causing them to splatter all over her. As she wiped off the gooey grits, she reached for the package, opening it carefully. Inside, she found what looked to be a Howler.
"Oh no! That looks like a Howler. Remember when we got one of those, Harry? That was embarrasing!" Ron exclaimed.
Hermione opened the letter, revealing, as expected, a Howler.
"YOUNG LADY! I AM ASHAMED OF YOU AND I DO NOT WISH TO SEE YOU THIS CHRISTMAS. HOW COULD YOU DO SOMETHING LIKE THIS?! I CANNOT BELIEVE SOMEONE OF SUCH BRILLIANCE WOULD DISRESPECT YOUR FATHER AND I! I KNOW THAT YOU THINK WE ARE GOING A LITTLE BIT OVERBOARD, BUT YOU NEED TO THINK ABOUT WHAT YOU DID. I MEAN COME ON, HERMIONE, WETTING YOUR PANTS AT THE DINNER PARTY WE WENT TO? I THOUGHT YOU WERE MORE MATURE THAN THAT!"
Hermione, red in the face, put her face in her hands, weeping as she laid down on her Japanese book.
"Hermione! You really did that?" Harry said. "What happened?"
"I can't even begin to explain Harry. I was so nervous! My parents made me get up in front of all those people and now they go and embarass me in fron of the school! Uh-oh, it's going to happen again... "
Meanwhile, at the other end of the Hall, another letter had been delivered, to none other that Albus Dumbledore. Opening the letter, he read it silently:
Dear Darling,
I have done my research like you asked and yes, you were right, they are going to be making it mandatory pretty soon. And to think, we haven't even started yet! I sent this letter as soon as I could, knowing that you needed it. I love you hon and I hope that all is well at Hogwarts.
Love,
Mrs. Dumbledore
As Dumbledore finished reading, he folded the letter up and thought to himself for a while. Thinking to himself he stood up and walked towards the direction of the entranbce to the Great Hall. Signaling for everypone to be quiet, he spoke clear and concise, "Attention Hogwarts students! I would like to inform you that as of today we will be starting a newspaper for the school. I know that this is something new, but I would like to see if it works out. I have already decided on the editor, thinking very hard, I chose someone who I could count on, thus, the reporter is Hermione Granger!" Some boos could be heard, even from her own table, as Hermione managed a fake smile. Dumbledore began to speak again, "The other jobs will be filled up accordingly, but I want whoever is part of the newspaper to know this. There will be pictures displayed on the cover of all of the staff, so I hope those of you are ready for that. Thank you all!"
Hermione turned back to Ron and Harry. "This could be cool, I guess. I wonder what I'm going to do for the picture...."
***
Hermione was ecstatic. She had begun to hyperventilate, shouting things in Japenese at the top of her lungs. She looked into the mirror, weeping at the thing on top of her head. As she gazed into the mirror, looking at her chopped off hair, Ron and Harry walked in.
"Oh my gosh Hermione! What did you do?" Ron gasped, his mouth drooping in awe.
"You don't like it?"
"No, it's not that..."
Hermione cut him off, "Good, because this is how it's gonna be. I already took the picture for the paper. It should be here soon. They said they were going to deliver the packages to the Common Rooms, so I cannot wait."
Crookshanks walked around Hermione's legs, purring softly.
"Do you want to go for a walk, Crookshanks?" Hermione asked, as she headed for the portrait, getting ready to take a walk. Opening the portrait slightly, she looked back. Crookshanks, wanting to get out, ran through her legs and right out into the hall, just to meet the bottom of an extremely large stack of newspapers. A cats meow and a thud alerted Hermione, as she ran into the hall. Looking down, she saw the remains of Crookshanks, undernath a stack of The Daily Pheonix. Tears in her eyes, she looked at the delivery-boy. It being Neville, she looked at him straight in the eyes, thinking hard. A rage ovbertook Hermione as she fell to the floor, crying.
"Baka, Baka, Baka, Neville!! I HATE YOUR GUTS!!!!!!!"
Hermione lay weeping on the ground, her head buried deep in her hands as she lay there crying herself to sleep.
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