Feelings

No one understands how I feel inside,

I never let it out I never even cried.

They tell me I’ll feel better if I talk it out,

But they aren’t me or know what it’s about.

We all had our ways to survive the war;

To numb our feelings, to feel no more.

Some used drugs or alcohol to answer the call,

Or turned off all emotions by building a wall.

How can others understand or feel my pain,

Unless you were there it’s just not the same.

I love my family; I wish I could let them in,

But how can I tell them, how do I begin?

I see the ghosts of buddies long since gone,

They visit me nightly and leave by dawn.

I feel like an outsider, I feel so alone,

Why can’t I be like others with a job, family and home?

Why couldn’t they of welcomed us home, it wasn’t very fair,

Or just a warm handshake to show us that they cared.

It would be nice to meet another Vet; we could sit and talk,

But usually I ignore them and hasten up my walk.

Michael D. Monfrooe

1996