CHAPTER FIFTY-EIGHT - A SLIGHT DISTRACTION
Kevin handed his bags to their new driver, jumping easily into the bus to locate the nearest empty seat. He nodded at Howie who was already there, waiting to begin the ride to their next destination. Kevin adjusted the seat to accommodate his large frame, then settled down to wait for the others.
With an exasperated shake of his head, Kevin watched as AJ boarded unsteadily, looking blearily around for a seat. Nick hopped on a few minutes later, his eyes bloodshot. Both had been out late, enjoying the nightlife, taking advantage of their mutual desire to stay away from Brian as much as possible.
As usual, Brian was the last to arrive, followed by his ever-present shadow, Xavier. Kevin watched as his cousin trudged on board, obviously exhausted, even though it was almost noon.
Brian gave him a small nod of recognition as he walked past. Kevin pointedly ignored his cousin, feeling a small twinge of guilt as he faked interest in the paper that lay in his lap. His anger towards Brian had begun to cool somewhat, allowing him the chance to secretly studied Brian for the past weeks, curious if the others had too. He wished he understood what made Brian act so bizarre, but lacked the desire to investigate deeper, not willing to rock the boat now that some air of normalcy had been restored, even if it was sorely strained.
Exiled from companionship, yet bound by obligation, Brian had continued on, pouring what little energy he possessed determinedly into each performance. Kevin knew that professional pride kept Brian on edge, not willing to give anything less than a hundred percent each time he took the stage. Down time was another matter. With lack of friendship came boredom, with boredom came lethargy. It seemed to Kevin that if Brian wasn't dozing he was somewhere with Xavier. He was glad that the bodyguard had upheld his end of the agreement and kept his cousin busy. Xavier had him under control, and best of all, Brian's daily absence was just the balm needed to keep the still open wounds of his betrayal from festering.
A bag containing his lunch was thrust at him and he took it gladly, grateful for something to do. He took a bite of his sandwich and watched as the others fished out theirs, noticing Brian declining the food offered from the bus driver.
Kevin chewed on his food thoughtfully. What gives? Now that he thought about it, it seemed that he never saw Brian eat. He wished he could talk to the guys about it, but the last time he had mentioned Brian's name, Nick and AJ had nearly snapped his head off. Sighing dejectedly, Kevin took another bite, and found he had lost his appetite. He suddenly understood how Brian felt. It was hard to feel hungry when your stomach was all ready full of despair.
* * * * *
The bus drove on, mile after endless mile, the drone of the engine finally lulling Brian into a light sleep. A quick and severe lurch of the bus woke him instantly and he sat up, hearing the colorful swearing of their new bus driver. He turned questioningly to look at Xavier, who instead was staring outside the bus window, along with the other guys. Curious, Brian peered out, his eyes widening in surprise.
He recognized nothing of the scenery outside, only to note that they seemed to be cruising through a very flat, God-forsaken terrain; the only thing significant being the school bus that was driving side by side with theirs, much too close for comfort. It seemed to be keeping pace intentionally and Brian glanced in confusion at the other guys who had their noses pressed to the window.
"What's going on?"
Kevin shrugged, his face still plastered to the window. "Not sure. Looks like some kind of bus with their team inside. They're waving like mad at us."
Nick scanned the side of the bus. "Yeah! Look! The Spartans," he read. "Must be a football team, maybe basketball." He turned to AJ, who had taken off his sunglasses for a better look. "What do you think they want?"
AJ pursed his lips. "Dunno. Find out."
Nick gave a small shrug of his shoulders and then began to tug at his window. It was stuck, so AJ leaned over to help him loosen it. It gave with a small snap and Nick leaned out, trying to hear what they were screaming. Interested, Howie did the same thing too.
"We're number one! We're number one!" came the energized chant, screaming their excitement as they waved various forms of gear and equipment out their window.
Nick sat back in his seat and turned to the guys. "I don't think they know who we are! They just want us to see them, I guess." He waved enthusiastically back.
AJ took in the scene before him and gave a snort of amazement as he peered closer. Turning to find Brian next to him he forgot his animosity for a moment and pointed. "Damn! Does that look like a bra to you?"
Brian stared intently, seeing several white objects whipping in the wind. "Uh, I see a lot of them."
"Cheerleaders?" AJ perked up, putting his fingers together to whistle. "Hey baby! Come to papa! Show us more!" All five laughed at AJ's antics, shaking their heads at his wolf whistle.
Nick leaned dangerously out, eager to see more. The high school bus merged closer, causing the Backstreet Boys' driver to swerve away. Nick yelled in shocked surprise as he felt himself slip, only to feel a firm grip yanking him back into his bus seat. Brian held on tightly, not letting go until Nick was able to regain his balance.
Shaken, Nick straightened up, seeing the scared but relieved looks on Kevin, AJ, and Howie's face. Nick glanced at Brian and flushed with embarrassment, painfully aware that Brian had been the one to rescue him. "Uh, thanks Frick." He managed a small smile, and Brian gave him a hesitant smile back.
"No problem. You sure get carried away by bras, Frack!"
The tension shattered, evaporating the bitterness that had been building within Nick over the past weeks. He gave Brian a wider grin and started to say something, only to be cut off by Howie, who was reaching blindly backwards for the two, his eyes never leaving the window. "Look!" he yelled, his laughter filled with disbelief. Nick and Brian broke their locked gaze and turned to see what was happening.
"Yes!"
AJ pumped his arms like crazy, enjoying the show before him, the wind blowing crazily in his face. Various parts of naked anatomy were posed strategically at them, bare asses either mooning them, or naked breasts jiggling in time to the bouncing bus. They heard several small items hit their bus and realized it was the team trying to pitch various articles of clothing to them. AJ caught one, crowing with delight as he paraded the bra before the others.
Brian heard Kevin laugh appreciatively, his eyes sparkling with delight. On a whim, he tapped his cousin on the shoulder, handing him some hats with the BSB logo on it.
"Toss it to them," he encouraged.
"I need more weight," Kevin frowned, looking around the bus. His search was interrupted by the loud chanting of "Spartans, Spartans, Spartans…" and he paused for a moment before leaning out the window.
"Backstreet, Backstreet, Backstreet!" he screamed, and all four looked at the normally reserved Kevin with surprise.
"Yeah!" shrieked Howie out the window, his enthusiasm catching. "Backstreet rules! We're number one!"
Brian, Nick, and AJ stuck their heads out simultaneously, screaming at the top of their lungs their chant. Now knowing their competition, the guys watched in amusement as they saw the cheerleaders push aside the team players, straining for a better look.
The girls screamed their delight, blowing kisses, arms reaching out in the futile attempt to touch them. Nick, AJ, Kevin, Howie, and Brian laughed at their antics, enjoying the flirting. Nick teased the girls with looks of passionate desire, AJ happily yelling comebacks to the girls' frank suggestions.
With groans of dismay, they guys watched as the school bus turned onto another highway, the waving hands and screams of goodbye fading away. All five flopped down in their seats, grinning at each other, pumped up.
Nick sighed. "Man, that was so awesome."
"What, the girls or their tits?" snickered AJ.
"Both," beamed Nick happily, and Kevin hooted at his expression.
"Time to get Nicky a real woman," laughed Kevin wickedly.
"Hey, I can get one all by myself, thank you!"
Kevin cracked up at Nick's defensive outburst, taunting him. Howie and AJ listened, laughing hard as Nick and Kevin tried to outdo each other with insults. Exhausted, AJ leaned back in his chair, wiping his teary eyes with the back of his hand. Damn. He couldn't believe how good it felt, how much he had missed this kind of camaraderie from the guys. Turning in his seat, eager to join in, he opened his mouth, only to stop as he caught sight of Brian, listening intently to what Xavier was telling him. Curious, he secretly eyed the two, noting the resentment and that had settled back into Brian's posture and face. Like Nick, he had been fully aware of the irony of Brian saving Nick from injury and the awkwardness that resulted from it. He wondered if any of the other guys felt as confused as he was. Brian was a true Dr. Jekyl and Mr. Hyde and AJ see-sawed between hating his guts to loving him like a brother. Pretending to listen to the guys excited banter, he watched out of the corner of his eye as Xavier lumbered up to talk to their bus driver. Brian was now sitting in the back, arms crossed, staring out at the passing scenery. AJ took a chance and leaped up from his seat to plop himself next to Brian.
"Wassup, Bri?"
Brian swiveled his head to stare hard at AJ. "Nothing that concerns you." The words were cold, sarcastic and the resentment in his eyes held nothing but contempt.
AJ nodded as if expecting it and stared back at Brian, his brown eyes containing the same intensity as Brian's blue ones. Without a word, he rose up and left, not hearing the faint sigh escaping from Brian.
CHAPTER FIFTY-NINE - A WARNING
Xavier grabbed a Coke from the bus' small fridge and snapped open the ring, dropping heavily into the seat next to Brian. "We should be there within the hour," he informed the quiet singer, raising his eyebrows as Brian ignored the information.
"Want a sip?" he questioned. Xavier smirked as Brian stared absorbedly out the window.
"Ahhh…you're not mad at me because of what I said, are you?" he whined in a soft, mocking tone, placing a massive hand on Brian's upper thigh. "I couldn't stand it if you were mad at me."
Brian shoved Xavier's hand forcibly away, glancing up quickly to see if any of the guys were watching, then glared darkly at the bodyguard. Over the past weeks, Xavier had intensified his caresses, making sure to do so only in public. Brian knew Xavier was shrewd, subtle with his gestures and clever enough not to cause suspicion but just intimate enough to keep him extremely uncomfortable. With one more vicious glare Brian turned in his seat, shrinking as far away as he could from Xavier.
Xavier laughed quietly at Brian, amused that he could plainly see how he affected the young singer. If he had known how entertaining this discreet game of sexual intimidation unnerved Brian, he would have started sooner. That he was attracted to the small Backstreet Boy was a fact, one that he now acknowledged freely to himself. He had wrestled for quite a while with that realization, uncomfortable at his discovery, never having been in a situation where he actually desired the person he chose as his next victim. Xavier glanced at Brian, who was shifting uneasily in his chair. Xavier shrugged, indifferent. As much as he wanted the blond singer, he prided himself on maintaining control, sexual or otherwise. As long as the game was continuing, he was satisfied, and sexual relief didn't factor in. Xavier knew any weakness on his part was a liability, and getting involved was a risk that he was unwilling to take. Xavier gave another small laugh. Still, it didn't hurt to have some fun and torment him …
Xavier snapped out of his musing as Nick playfully slammed into the opposite seat, waving a hand-held game under Brian's nose.
"Hey Bri, wanna play?"
Once again, Brian knew it was Nick's peace offering, trying to mend their strained relationship. He stiffened, sensing Xavier's intimidating eyes bearing down on him. He struggled internally, remembering all too well Xavier's menacing threats a few moments ago. Angry at having to ruin their fragile truce, Brian leaned forward towards Nick, his words harsher than he intended them to be.
"Jeez, Nick! Just because you almost fell out of the bus, you think we're now friends." Brian held up his cast, as a reminder. "Don't think I haven't forgotten this. Oh, by the way, have you ever thought that maybe I was really trying to push you out instead of pull you in?"
Nick backed away slowly, stung by Brian's vicious words. His eyes locked onto Brian's, the hatred clearly visible. "I wish I had broken more than your wrist," he whispered with such fury that even Xavier was impressed by the young man's wrath.
They both watched as Nick strode angrily back to his seat before Xavier turned to give Brian a thoughtful look. "Damn. Maybe I should have picked him instead of you." He knew this would set Brian off and it did.
"Leave him alone or by God I swear I'll find a way to kill you."
Xavier gave a small snort of derisive laughter and reclined in his chair, closing his eyes, not noticing the true hunger that lay in Brian's bright blue gaze.
CHAPTER SIXTY – REFLECTION
Everything was falling apart and there wasn't a damn thing AJ could do to stop it. He resignedly followed the other four guys into the media room, taking a seat quietly as he patiently waited for another mindless interview to begin. He had purposely chosen the darkest shades he could find, not wanting anyone to see him. If they did, they would be surprised to see the desperation, the despair that shone plainly in his dark brown eyes.
The interview began and AJ hoped the questions would be held to a minimum, he had no desire to answer the same old questions he had heard a million times before. He scoffed under his breath as he listened to Nick, Howie, and Kevin repeat how tight the group was, that they were more than friends, they were like brothers, blah, blah, blah…. AJ answered a question tossed at him with a noncommittal grunt, not caring about the strange look the interviewer threw his way. Right now his worry lay with Brian, who sat on the opposite side of him. Brian kept his head down until asked a question, then answered in soft replies, all the while restlessly playing with a pencil. From behind his glasses AJ stared frankly at him, taking his time to study him thoroughly.
Last week had been pure hell, a total of six shows in seven days, and with every show their relationship with Brian had deteriorated further, to the point where AJ seriously considered if it was a mistake in forcing him to stay with the group. Any resemblance of warmth towards Brian was held strictly on stage for the fans; once they exited the arena it became a war zone. No one was taking prisoners, each doing their best to destroy with harsh looks and even harsher words. Brian took their shots with comebacks of his own, often more bitter than what he received. Soon however, he ceased to answer back. He withdrew into a stony silence, making his presence scarce, gone for long stretches at a time with Xavier, only to reappear just before showtime. What Brian did during those long hours was anybody's guess, but his absence was the only thing that kept things sane.
AJ tore away from his thoughts long enough to listen to Brian's explanation of his sudden weight loss. He had begun to recently wear thick sweaters along with heavy leather coats, the size of his clothing trying to add deceptive bulk to his frame. Their fans were far from stupid and it did not go unnoticed on the various internet websites regarding Brian's appearance. It was only natural for the interviewer to ask, since it was so obvious. Interested, AJ strained to catch what Brian would say, only to hear Brian's standard answer about a "new look," and "wanting to get in better shape."
He spared a quick glance at Nick who was rolling his eyes dramatically. He bit his lip, pissed at Nick's lack of control, but knew better than to call him on it; Nick was spoiling for a fight and it wasn't hard to see how the emotional and mental turmoil was taking a toll on him.
AJ listened offhandedly as the interview came to a close, glad to be out of there. Tonight was their final show before taking a hiatus and the lure of flying back home and zoning out for a week was sounding more and more like pure heaven to him. The interview finally over, AJ sat up and stretched, giving Howie a "lets go" nod. In mid-yawn, he watched as Xavier came over to slap his massive hands down on Brian's shoulders, shaking him almost affectionately as a signal to get up and leave. Brian stiffened for only a fraction of a moment, but AJ caught it and the look of disgust that flickered across Brian's face. Surprised, AJ experienced a flash of deja vu. He thought hard for a moment, trying to place where he had witnessed something similar, then shrugged, irritated at being unable to pinpoint it.
He watched as the two left together, conceding to the fact that as much as he disliked Xavier, the bodyguard had done a good job of keeping Brian under control and out of sight. He just hoped the bodyguard would be as successful for the second half of their tour. Howie slapped AJ gently on the arm, breaking him out of his reverie, indicating it was time to go. AJ nodded and followed him out.