Andrew stared at the sight in front of him, lower lip caught between white teeth, eyes
shining with mirth. "Xan," he asked, trying hard to hold back the giggles, "what are you
doing?"
Xander, from his position crouched on the kitchen counter, blushed and replied, "I was
attacked!"
Andrew suddenly lost all sense of amusement and exclaimed, "Oh my gosh, Xan are you
all right?"
Xander blushed even harder and said, "Ok, it SO wasn't my fault, but Dawn left some
powder thingy on the counter, and I sorta knocked it over and it got all over your oven
mitt and I think she was experimenting with some of Willow's spells becuase then the
mitt came to life and started chasing me, and I didn't know what to do and please don't be
mad, but I think your oven mitt is now a demon!"
Andrew just stared at Xander. He didn't know how to react to that kind of statement. His
oven mitt, his beloved oven mitt that had carried him through such hard times last year in
Sunnydale, was a demon?
Part Two (Mantis St. Mantis)
But Andrew knew that something needed to be done. "It comes down to this, then," he said with a dramatic waver in his voice. "We need to kill the mitt."
Xander wasn't sure why Andrew seemed to be so crazed over the mitt. It was just an oven
mitt. Or, at least it had been until Xander got clumsy.
Andrew picked up a butcher knife and tried twirling it, promptly fumbling it. Xander
jumped back with a whimper as it clattered onto the counter. "Perhaps we should formulate an actual plan first," he suggested.
"Oh, yeah. Ok," Andrew conceded.
Part Three (Sparky)
Spike walked into chaos. Not that this was an uncommon occurance. It always seemed to
be chaotic in the Harris/Wells/Bloody/Summers residence.
"Wot's all this then? Have you lot finally gone bonkers?"
Andrew and Xander looked at Spike from where they had finally cornered the
Mitt!Demon after 40 futile minutes of trying to kill the thing. The mitt was now cowering
the corner and wimpering.
"No! The mitt is evil!" Andrew exclaimed. "We must kill it for the sake of the innocents
in the house."
Spike snorted. "What house are you living in?"
Part Four (Whiskey Meteor)
"Spike, we happen to live in a house that fights for good, that turns its nose up at evil...
and then turns it back down again so that it can see straight when it kills that evil."
Andrew crossed his arms over his chest and aimed a snotty look at Spike.
Xander snorted. "Um, Andy, I hate to burst your bubble there, but fifty percent of the
people living in this house were, at some point in time, evil." He pulled himself up off the
floor. "Including you."
Andrew pouted. "But we're all good now, right?" He turned to Spike for back-up, but the
vampire offered him nothing but a wicked grin. Andrew opened his mouth to back
himself up, but his train of thought was derailed as something soft rubbed up against his
ankle. "What the?" All three men looked down to the floor, where the newly demonized
oven mitt was rubbing against Andrew's ankle fondly.
Spike snorted. "I think the little mitt might like you."
Andrew looked down at the mitt nervously. "Xander?" he asked. "This little guy attacked
you, right? It didn't have big teeth, or... or hidden tentacles or anything, did it?"
Xander scratched his head thoughtfully. "I don't think so," he said. "Definitely no
tentacles, anyway."
Andrew reached down and tentatively patted the oven mitt. It made a soft chirping noise,
and Andrew smiled. He knelt down and patted the mitt. "Aw," he said, "you're a good
little mitt-demon, aren't you?"
Spike looked at Xander in disbelief. "Remind me again why you two were so keen to kill
*that*?" He pointed down at the mitt, which was chirping and rubbing softly against
Andrew's hand.
"It attacked me," Xander insisted, and then frowned. "But now I think it might have just
been trying to play."
Andrew looked up from the floor, bright-eyed. "Can we keep him?" he pleaded. "Please?"
Xander looked doubtful, and Spike looked a little bored. Andrew put on his best pout.
"Pleeeease?"
Spike and Xander exchanged a look. How could they say no to that?
And after all, how much trouble could one little mitt-demon be?
Part Five (Sparky)
"'How hard can it be' he says. 'It's just a little Mitt!Puppy' he says!" Xander smacked his
head against the wall for the fourth time in a minute. "That's as bad as saying 'it can't get
worse'."
"Oi, would you shut your yap and gimme a hand here, whelp." Spike groused from where
he was half under the couch, trying to coax the little mitt!demon out of hiding. "This is all
your fault you know!"
"My fault!" Xander yelped, pretending that he wasn't oogling Spike's finely shaped
bottom as the vampire in question wriggled around under the couch.
Spike emerged from the under the couch and said, "If you hadn't scared the bloody thing
by turning on the oven, we wouldn't be in this mess!"
"Oh, sure. Blame the Xan-man. You're not completely innocent either Blondie!" Xander
crossed his arms and glared at the shorter man. "If you hadn't threatened to use the mitt in
the oven, he...it...the thing wouldn't be under the couch!" Xander gave Spike a smug grin.
"So, really, it's your fault."
"well, who turned the thing sentient in the first place!"
"Guys!" Andrew whined. "Would you stop fighting and help me out here!"
Andrew had returned from the pet shop in time to see Xander oogling Spike, and had
been amused at first at their fighting. But then his arms started burning and as soon as it
looked like Spike and Xander may start with the physical bashing, he had taken it upon
himself to step in.
After all, Andrew didn't want Spike and Xander to get physical unless it was of the sexy
kind, and Andrew was in the middle.