| TOW The Cat |
| Chip: ....and then Zania let one rip! Monica: Look, not that I don't enjoy talking about people who I went to high school with -'cause I do- but, um, maybe we could talk about something else? Like you, I don't know even know where you work? Chip: You know where I work! Monica: I do? Chip: The movie theatre! You used to come in all the time. Monica: You still work at the multiplex? Chip:Oh, like I'd give up that job! Free popcorn and candy, anytime I want. I can get you free posters for your room. Monica: Thanks, I'm set. Do you still live with your parents? Chip: Yeah, but I can stay out as late as I want. Ross: I was just leaving. Rachel: Good. 'Cause I've got a product report to read; it's like eight pages, I hope I don't fall asleep. Ross: Why, did you write it? Monica: Look, you and I went to different highschools. Rachel: Okay that doesn't help me because we went to the same highschool. Monica: You went to one where you were popular, and you got to ride off on Chip's motorcycle and wear his letterman jacket. I went to one where I wore a band uniform they had to have specially made. Rachel: They had to have that specially made? Monica: It was a project for one of the home-ec classes. Rachel: Oh my God, they told us that was for the mascot! Monica:Back then, I thought I would never, ever get the chance to go out with Chip Matthews, and now he's called me up and asked me out. And the fat girl inside me really wants to go. I..I owe her this. I never let her eat. Rachel: Oh, you go out with him. Monica: Oh, really?! Rachel: Yeah. Just, if it's possible, could you leave him somewhere and go have sex with another guy? Monica: I'll try. Monica: What happened? Chandler: Oh, umm, Joey was born and 28 years later I was robbed. Chandler: Ah, Gepeto, $5,000 dollars? Are you insane? Joey: Hey, the ad alone cost 300 bucks! Chandler: All right look, I'm changing it to 50 bucks or your best offer. Joey: What kind of profit is that?! And you call yourself an accountant. Chandler: Nooo. Joey: Oh. What do you do? Chandler: I can't believe you dont know what I do for a living! Phoebe: Yeah, I actually don't know... Ross: Good, so do I... Rachel: Something to do with numbers? Phoebe: Oh my God! No! Shoo! Kitty! No! No-no-no! Shoo! Come on, you! Come on. Crazy. Oh my God. Rachel: What? Phoebe: Nothing. Nothing. Joey: What? What's wrong? Phoebe: I just, I just have this really strong feeling that this cat is my mother. Rachel: You mean the mom you met in Montauk. She was a cat?! Phoebe: No-no-no, she was a human lady. This is the spirit of my mom, Lily, the one who killed herself. Ross: Are you sure she's in the cat or have you been taking your grandma's glycoma medicine again? Ross: So you guys having any luck getting rid of the entertainment center? Joey: Well, there were a couple of calls last night, but ah, I dont think any of them are gonna work out. Chandler: Yes, Joey has a very careful screening process. Apparently not everyone is qualified to own wood and nails. Chandler: What the hell happened?! How were you locked in?! And where the hell is all of our stuff?! Joey: Well, this guy came by to look at the unit and-and he said he didn't think it was big enough to fit a grown man! Chandler: So--you got in voluntarily?! Joey: I was tryin' to make a sale! Oh, man, if I ever run into that guy again, you know what I'm gonna do? Chandler: BEND OVER?! |