| TOW They All Turn Thirty |
| Ross: Hey, thirty is not that old! Do you know how old the Earth is? Rachel: Late thirties? Tag: Look, Rachel, I know what you're going through. I'm totally freaked out about turning twenty-five Rachel: Get out. Get out of my apartment. Chandler: Monica's wasted. Ross: Maybe that will liven up this party. Chandler: Okay, will you just go help her change, please? Rachel: Okay, but taking care of a drunk, naked woman seems like a job for Joey Phoebe: I haven't done any of the things I wanted to do by the tiume I was 31! Joey: Like what? Phoebe: Like..Okay, I....I haven't met any Portugeuse people! I...I haven't had the perfect kiss! And I haven't been to sniper school! Monica: I can't believe you bought this. Rachel: Really! God Ross, what were you thinking? (to Phoebe) I know it's really shallow but a part of me wants him again. Phoebe: Oh, well, get in line, missy. Ross: That's not what this is about okay? I...I am a sports car enthusiast. I have always been into cars. Joey: Hey, whats the horsepower on this thing? Ross: I don't know, but....but look how shiny! Monica: Heyyy! You got the door open! [giggles] Chandler: Hey-hey are you drunk? Monica: Noo!! [giggles] Okay. [she tries to pull herself up by Rachel and Joey's doorknob but the door opens and she almost falls into their apartment. she manages to catch herself] Whoa! [stands up, unsteadily] Okay. See I was, I was a little nervous about turning [whispering] thirty. [Giggles] So the bus boys took me out for some drinks. [Pause] I wanna puke on you later! Chandler: Okay, here is the thing. We have thrown a very formal surprise party for you in there! All your friends are in there and your parents! Monica: Nooo! Chandler: Yes! Monica: Nooo! Chandler: Yes! Chandler: How are you feeling? Monica: You are so handsome! I wanna make love to you right here, right now! [growls and pulls him in for a kiss] Ross: I really wish you wouldn't. Chandler: [to Monica] Now all you have to do is just to get through a little bit more, okay? Then we can put you in bed, okay? Just smile and don't talk to anyone. "I did it! One mile on a hippity-hop! That's it! That's everything I wanted to do before I was thirty. Oh, except I wanted to patch things up with my sister. But oh well. Yay! And girls, this thing is a Godsend if you know what I mean!"-Phoebe Chandler: Okay! Okay! Everybody down! Everybody down! [ripping noise] Jack Geller: Crap. "Y'know what I'd really like to say? I'm drunk!! That's right mom and dad, your little Harmonica is hammered! And guest what! I've been drunk before! And I've smoked a cigarette! And I got a box of Ding-Dongs hidden in my underwear drawer! It's okay because I turned thirty today and I can do anything I want! Because I am a grownup! [falls over sideways]"-Monica Chandler: She's not as pretty as she was when she was twenty-nine. Tag: Miss Green would like to establish some ground rules before she comes out. She would appreciate it if you didn't use the words "old" or "downhill" or "they still look pretty damn good". Joey: They do! "You know what? I am going to do something today. I'm not just gonna sit around like some old lady. I'm gonna get something pierced"-Rachel "If I want to have a kid when I'm 35, I don't have to get pregnant until I'm 34 which gives Prada 4 years to start making maternity clothes"-Rachel |