| TOW The Cheap Wedding Dress |
| Megan: So who's your photographer? Monica: Jeffrey. Megan: We met with him. Did he show you the photos of the nude wedding he did? Monica: The best man? Wow! Megan: I know! I almost called off my wedding. Megan: Oh, you're so lucky! My finacee wants the heavy metal band Carcass. Phoebe: Oh, is that spelled with a 'C' or a 'K'? Oh My God! It doesnt matter; they're both great! Joey: I'm Joey. Kristen: Kristen. Joey: Oh, wow, what a beautiful name! What is it again? Kristen: Well, uh, Ross, this is Joey...Joey, Ross. Joey: Hi! Ross: Hi. It's nice to meet you. I used to have a friend named Joey. I don't anymore. Ross: So, Joey, um, you look familiar. Are, uh, are you on TV or something? Kristen: Well, Joey doesn't like to talk about it but, he's one of the stars of Days of Our Lives Ross: That's right! That's right. Don't you play a woman? Joey: A woman in a man's body. Ross: Much better. Joey: You know, Ross, it's funny, because you look familiar to me too. Have you ever been married? Ross: Well, yes, yes I have. In fact, um, just the other day Kristen and I were talking about how I've been married and how I have a son. Kristen: Yeah, little Eric. Ross: That's right. No, wait, Ben. Joey: So you've just been married that one time? Ross: Well um.. Kristen: You've been married twice? Ross: Yes. And another time after that. Boy I'm getting hungry! Hey Joey, have you ever been so hungry on a date that when the girl goes to the bathroom you eat some of her food? Kristen: You said the waiter ate my crab cake! Joey: Yeah. So, uh, Ross, now why did that first marriage break up? Was it because the woman was straight or because she was a lesbian. Kristen: Do you two know each other? Ross and Joey: No. Joey: No. It just seems like Ross is the kind of guy that would marrry a woman on the verge of being a lesbian and then push her over the edge. Ross: Wait a minute! Were you on a poster for gonorrhea? Joey: Have you ever slept in the same bed with a monkey? Ross: Hey, you leave Marcel out of this! Joey: Fine! Have you ever got stuck in a pair of your own leather pants? Ross: Hey, hey have you ever locked yourself in a TV cabinet, VD boy? Joey: Monkey lover! Joey: When do you think we lost her? Ross: Probably around gonorrhea. Chandler: Hi, honey, I'm home! Monica: Don't come in here! Chandler: Why? Do you have another boyfriend in there or something? Monica: No! We only mess around at his place! Chandler: You know, its funny, I started it, but now it's scaring me. So could you come out here please? "All right, listen up. There is usually only one dress in each size so when they open those doors, fan out. Now, this is what you're looking for! [holds up a picture of the dress] Memorize it! When you locate the dress, blow on these, all right? [gives Rachel & Phoebe whistles] Three short blasts. When you hear it, come running."-Monica [three blows from a whistle come from the bathroom] "You're out of toilet paper!"-Rachel Phoebe: Since when are you into swing music? Chandler: Oh, since forever. I used to go all over town listening to bands.. Monica: Chandler. Chandler: Gap commercial. "So, Ross, how was your date the other night? Did you tell her about the magical ride that starts with the flush of every toilet?"-Chandler Chandler: While Monica and I were dancing to them, it was the first time I knew that you were the woman that I wanted to dance all my dances with. Monica: Aww, crap. |