My Friends,
Today (March 8, 2004) would have been Steve Erny's 40th Birthday, and I couldn't let the day go by without some reflections on Steve's life and tragic passing.
I considered Steve my best friend for all of those years in Taiwan, and I was lucky to have such a great friend. Steve was selfless and generous, genuinely compassionate, unwaveringly conscientious, and a lot of fun to hang out with, as you all remember as well as I. Steve and I spent countless afternoons together, walking downtown, listening to records in his room, or just sitting and talking about anything that seemed important. Those were some of the best memories I have of growing up.
It is especially sad that Steve died just two and half weeks before his 20th birthday. In other words, he died a teenager, a time when life is so full of confusion, internal conflict and angst. We can only speculate on what tormented Steve to the point of suicide. I, too, went through times when ending it all seemed like a viable solution, but I'm thankful that I never had the guts. Now, many years later, with a loving wife, exuberant children and a meaningful career, I shudder to think that all this might have never been.
If only Steve had survived, he would surely look back now at the trials and tribulations of 1984 with an embarassed smile, full of relief that it was so long ago and far away, happy in the confidence that comes with growing older, wiser and more seasoned in the challenges of life, the ebb and flow of fortune. I wish Steve could have realized then that things would get better and that he would find his place of peace in the world; but it is hard for a teenager to believe that when problems seem so overwhelming.
But let it never be said that time has erased the memories of Steve Enry. He was and remains an inspiration to me. I have told my children about him, to impress on them the value of great friendship, and also to pass on to the next generation the stories about Steve, for therein lies some meansure of immortality, which Steve certainly deserves. Some may believe that Steve went to a sort of heaven or paradise. I can no longer believe in such otherworldly places, but I would like to think that Steve's life-force returned to the nurturing Earth to take another form - as someone or something of great nobility and kindness, like the Steve we all knew and loved.
So, wherever you are, Steve, I wish you a happy 40th birthday!
Your friend always,
Brian Beckon |
