A Mother's Confession
As mothers we like to believe that we are the teachers. We set the example to live by, but if I were to be truthful I have learned much more from my children then I could ever teach them.
I’ve learned that a romance novel will fit perfectly into the VCR. However a tape inserted backwards will not eject. You can dye almost anything with kool-aid, chocolate syrup is a good substitute for brown paint and maple syrup is an excellent bonding agent. You can use coffee grounds as dirt piles for army men, baking powder makes good snow and a little water and toilet paper make army men into mummies.
I know the joy of hearing a baby cry for the first time, the healing power of laughter and an appreciation for silence. My children taught me gratitude for small things, patience is an art well rewarded and how hurtful words can be.
I’ve learned that a smile can melt your heart and how good it feels to get a hug for no reason. I think the most important lesson I learned from my children is what unconditional love is. The kind of love only a mother knows. The love the makes hard times bearable and the good times live on forever.
~Tina
Published Aug. 2001 at www.inkthoughts.com
I recall the first time I held you. You were this precious puckered little angel. I began nursing you immediately. You suckled contently your tiny hand splayed across my breast. I remember thinking there was no more endearing sight then a child nursing.
Since then there have been many milestone moments. Your first smile nearly melted my heart. You giggled for the first time and I laughed until my sides hurt. Your first tooth and an infectious gap toothed grin. Your first word was DADA but mom’s joy matched his. When you finally did say momma the tears flowed. I knew no sweeter words had ever been spoken.
Then you were crawling and you would squeal in delight, as I would crawl after you pretending I couldn’t catch you. Then I would suddenly grab you up and swoosh you into my arms. You would hug me tight and smile. When you started to walk I would follow you around petrified that you would fall and I wouldn’t be there to catch you. Your first little boo boo hurt me more then it did you. As those huge tear drops rolled down your red toddler cheeks my heat broke into a million pieces. I just knew I was not fit to be a mother.
You used climb into my lap, place your chubby little hands on my cheeks and give me a kiss. Then you would nestle your head snuggly to my chest and twiddle my hair until you fell into a sweet slumber.
It seemed like moments the years passed so quickly. Your first Christmas. Your first birthday, then your 4th and then you 10th. The first time you rode a two-wheeler and the first time you played in the snow. How many momentous milestones and priceless memories? I try to capture them all and store them in my frazzled brain. Everyday I add more and one day when I am an old woman alone in an empty nest I will treasure each one. Still I know that I shall cherish most are those of you at my breast. Those special moments when there was only you and I.
~Tina Warren
Shattered
A brutal man with a cruel heart,
One battered baby and her
innocence part.
The frightened child in a woman
grown,
A thousand tears for the horror she’s known.
In few short years the devil is
free,
In the mirror shattered remnants
of me.
Tortured nightmares of a long
lost soul
~Tina
Warren
This is poem that just came to me. I do
not typically write poetry so I was sort
of surprised and I am sure it will see a
few more revisions before it's finished.
More to come as I convert
my ramblings from pen and paper to the electronic world.
I hope you will check back often and please e-mail and let me know your thoughts
on
what I have written. I hope you enjoyed your visit.