Why I did not prosecute the guy that raped me.
			There are some things in life that arnt worth fighting for. This is one of them. Bringing charges could result in hurting a lot of my friends. It also will come down to my word against his. This will also dredge up things I dont want to think about and just dont want to handle. I have delt with the situation both by confronting him and by letting go of my anger and hatred. This has been a good way of coping for me. Plus I can revel in the fact I told all of fargo his name and what he did. He will never get near a girl again. He will not ever hurt another girl because he knows he has a shit load of people who will kill him if he does.  I know everyone thinks he should go to jail for what he did or get beat up, but this is not a option. He was under 18 the law would favor him.
				Why I am not going to New Mexico:
	All my life I have just wanted out of this town. I thought I had the oppertunity but as usual things didn't fall into place. One of my best friends got a intern ship in Alaska, and therefore was not going to be in NM. This sucked, but was something I could deal with. However, NMT ( New Mexico Tech) decided my credits would not transfer correct. They were going to make over half my credits electives. They were going to make me retake classes such as English, calc, and Science. This would mean I would have at leaste three more years if I transfered. Being that I can graduate in about a yr - yr and a half at NDSU I decided to stay. This sucks because NDSU is the root of all that is evil. Especially the Finaical aid office which makes my head hurt when i go in it. Also, a big reason this sucks is I dont get to be with Daniel. I dont get to see the beauty that is out side of Fargo. I am stuck yet again sucking in the life of this world I know and dangling inches away from one I want to know.
				Upadate:
					Just a quick update since I have been so damned buzy and havnt written anything for so long. I am dating again (yay) and he is a super sweety. His name is Jon. He is a larper ( but not over board, mostly DND), anime geek, computer geek, and a car geek. He is a great guy. Very smart and fascinating to listen to, and most of all he is weird and crazy we get along great. We have been going out a month now ( as of Nov 6th). We have a odd relationship which consists of us seeing eachother at like 7:30 - 9 b4 I go to class and then on weekends when he is not out of town and at gamer conventions when were both being geeks :) It works out good though cuz I still have plenty of time to focus on school, work, my friends, and getting my life back together. I am actually doing real well. School grades are up again since my lil breakdown ( I will go in to that in more detail at some other time). For the first time in a long time I am relativly happy. I am actually sleeping at midnight and waking up around 7:30 and feeling good.  My ambitions are up :) I am actually acomplishing shit again. YAy! Well ttyl ..more updates soon I promise....