~Mr. Beanwell at Easter Party~
Cast: Baby Boy as Mr. Beanwell

Grace as Hope

Sport as Cupid

Baby Boy as Spring

Frisco as Hopper

Baby Girl as Eggs

Decade as Eggs II

Mr. Beanwell: Easter’s my favorite holiday because it gives me a chance to criticize candy makers on their candy. Cadbury – your eggs have more peanut butter than Mr. Peanut has salt! Try to tone it down already! Have I told you peanut butter and chocolate don’t mix? I’m talking to you, whoever invented Reese’s peanut butter cups! Starburst people, I love your candies, but your jellybeans taste like artificial fruit bars! You might as well include fake jelly in them! Yuck!

Hope: Hi, Mr. Beanwell.

Mr. Beanwell: Hi, Hope. Hope your Easter’s doing good. Mine isn’t. I’m eating cheap chocolate made by a production company that kills goats!

Hope: I guess that’s why I’ve been praying.

Mr. Beanwell: Okay, so you like the chocolate.

Hope: I don’t either. They say it’s gourmet chocolates, but I know it isn’t. It’s cheap. That’s why I brought my own. Take a look – I brought Godiva chocolates, enough for the both of us.

Mr. Beanwell: Oh, Godiva! They’re much better than the garbage that sits out at the supermarket!

Cupid: Oh, man, Godivas! Hope, can I have one?
Hope: Sorry, but you have to be my boyfriend if you want them.

Cupid: Oh, then can I be your boyfriend?
Hope: I have one already – Bruce. He’s so smart, and he dishes out the trash.

Mr. Beanwell: Nestle, Crunch is good, but why did you start putting caramel in them? It tastes like chocolate pudding mixed in with peanut butter!

Cupid: Rolo is the best caramel candy. I mean, I can’t get enough of them.

Hope: Then you might want to stock up.

Cupid: Well, I guess I should. Talk to you later.

Hope: Okay. Hmm, that dog gives me the creeps. He says he’s by a sexual. Now what does that mean anyway?
Mr. Beanwell: I don’t know what you’re talking about.

Hope: Anyway, say something else about candy.

Mr. Beanwell: Okay… um, M&M’s, can you please stop being so brown? There are so many other shell colors – stop making so much brown!
Hope: Why?
Mr. Beanwell: Brown makes me think of that bear Ty made that made me sick!

Hope: Which one?
Mr. Beanwell: You know, that really fuzzy one… I don’t remember what its name was. Anyway, I need to tell you about our friend Spring here. He’s so blue; he doesn’t even know he’s happy! He’s like Eeyore mixed in with Peter Cottontail! He’s good-looking and sad! Bad mix! Come on, get happy!
Spring: But I can’t. It’s so hard for me to change color. I want to be white like my Beanie Buddy counterpart.

Mr. Beanwell: I know. I could try to find some hair dye later and clean you up.

Spring: No hair dye. It makes me go bald.

Mr. Beanwell: I know. Bunnies are sensitive. Anyway, Hope, what do you think?
Hope: Blue isn’t his natural color. Maybe if he washes up with a strong cleanser, he’ll find out he really is a white rabbit.

Mr. Beanwell: Yeah, like what I did when I was afraid my tattoo was permanent.

Hopper: Hey, I’m a gray rabbit! Gray is my natural color and I’m not feeling any happier!
Mr. Beanwell: I can’t criticize the way you look. Sorry.

Hope: Maybe I can – Hopper, your gray coat reminds me of something Liz Taylor threw in the garbage!

Hopper: WAAAHHHHHH!

Mr. Beanwell: You made him feel worse!
Hope: Kidding! Just kidding!
Hopper: Oh, for real?
Hope: Yeah, Hopper. I’m trying to see what would make you happier.

Hopper: I see. I’m late, I’m late, for a very important date. No time to say hello, goodbye! (leaves)

Hope: I don’t know what’s up with him.

Mr. Beanwell: Maybe Ty retired him too early. Ooh, here come Eggs and Eggs II!

Eggs: Mr. Beanwell, Hope, how are you doing?
Eggs II: I was just sitting through that “Malibu’s Most Wanted” piece of garbage. I haven’t seen a white rapper that bad since Vanilla Ice started showing up at my house! I thought it was the name of a piece of candy someone wanted to deliver to me!

Eggs: I was in a different movie, that “Bulletproof Monk”. And Seann William Scott is no whoever that was in “The Matrix”.

Eggs II: Oh, that’s a baby movie. That guy unwraps and eats those bullets because there’s chocolate in them.

Eggs: Speaking of chocolate, Hope, have you eaten those peppermint patties? If you mix peppermint with chocolate, you get a piece of crap!

Mr. Beanwell: Good one, Eggs! I wouldn’t want that recipe in my cookbook!

Eggs: Ooh, I got another one: Hope, I hope that you won’t eat gummi worms! Those things are so gross, especially when sugar comes out of their slimy little bodies!
Hope: I never eat gummi worms. Those things are grosser than real worms. I don’t have to look at worms.

Mr. Beanwell: Unless you were watching “Fear Factor”.

Hope: Yeah.

Eggs II: The thing about Raisinets and Goobers are that Raisinets are better. Goobers make my mouth swirl for some reason.

Hope: Hmm, I like them both, but I prefer Raisinets.

Eggs: I agree. Goobers are a bunch of goobers!

Mr. Beanwell: Um, let’s see what other candies irritate me… Milk Duds, do me a favor: taste good.

Hope: Ha-ha! Cold one!
Eggs II: What about marshmallow eggs? I love those.

Mr. Beanwell: Oh, so do I.

Hope: We can all agree on that.

Eggs: Why don’t we go get some at that table?
Mr. Beanwell: Um, first, I need to make sure they don’t have real eggs in them.