~Monologue~
Cast: Grace as herself

Mother as Grace’s evil twin

Seadog as himself

Grace: Thank you! It’s great to be hosting Beanieday Night Live, especially since Easter is tomorrow! Yeah! I love Easter, because Hope always lets me use her deodorant that day. Hope also lets me use her cookware, too. We’re sisters, by the way. Don’t think we’re the “L” word. Easter is tomorrow, and normally before I go to bed, I say a prayer. But today I pray that I have a good time here! Anyway, still trying to think of something to say…

Grace’s evil twin: How about you say, “Audience, I hate you?”
Grace: Oh, look. It’s my evil twin. Go to hell, you evil devil!
Grace’s evil twin: You talk just like me, ha-ha-ha.

Grace: But for you, I don’t like you. You’re my evil twin, and you’re supposed to make me say things I don’t like.

Grace’s evil twin: Yeah, yeah. Everyone says that. I mean, I want you to say things you don’t like and you want me to say things I don’t like.

Grace: Give me a few examples.

Grace’s evil twin: “Dear God, please give my parents a safe home in heaven. Please look over all lost friends. Love, Grace.”

Grace: Why don’t you like that?
Grace’s evil twin: It’s NICE! It’s too nice! I’m evil! E-eee-eee-vil!

Grace: Okay, don’t get too evil because I want you to get used to being…

Grace’s evil twin: Nyah-nyah-nyah-nyah-nyah. Okay, I listened.

Grace: No you didn’t. You completely tuned me out.

Grace’s evil twin: Wait, I can have bad days too?
Grace: Shut up.

Grace’s evil twin: You freak me out! Leave me alone today!
Grace: Um, Seadog? You like chasing rabbits, right?
Seadog: I’ll chase him. I’m all dressed for “Weekend Update”, so I can have a little fun before the news.

Grace: This might take a while for this one to surrender.

Grace’s evil twin: Who’s going to surrender?
Seadog: Our top story tonight: Grace’s evil twin is dead.

(Grace’s evil twin and Seadog start chasing each other)
Grace: We’ve got a really great chat tonight, so stick around! We’ll be right back!