~Weekend Update with Seadog~
Cast: Seadog as himself

Decade as himself

Dippy as Leah Dorfman

Tubbo as Dustin Barber

Bo as Michael Barber

Sport as Mr. Barber

Seadog: Good evening, I’m Seadog, and here are tonight’s top stories:

The new Asia-Pacific exclusive bears have shipped to stores with Ai, Aussiebear, Coreana, Singabear, Wirabear, and Kiwiana all seen in their respective countries. With the bears made available now, collectors have a chance to see Celebrate the bear playing Pokemon, Hello Kitty, and Hamtaro at the same time. But what about the Aussies… oh, yeah, Paul Hogan or the Crocodile Hunter.

After a week of speculation dealing with the USA themed bears not appearing on international order forms, the new Liberty Buddies, Red, and Red White & Blue have been listed as USA exclusives. The decision to announce it so late was inspired by when he went to history class late every day, he forgot whether the president was American or not.

The Wrigley Field game day exclusive Dusty was released and retired on Sunday on Ty’s website. Many collectors’ responses to the retirement: “Duh.”

Ty hinted in Ask Ty that fans are in for a real treat at the ballpark this summer after the release of the Dusty bear. Watch for the Dirty bear, the Stinky bear, the Dingy bear, and the Bump on the Face After Being Hit by a Home Run Ball bear at your local stadium or arena.

Also, Ty said in the same response that bananas are okay. Adding to his opinion, as long as they weren’t touched by any of the crewmembers that work on “Fear Factor”.

The beautiful red Decade variation was shipped out last week, but because of many right and left wing liberals debating today, we can’t let it be one-sided, so here now to talk of the variation is our own Decade.

Decade: Thanks again, Seadog. My, you look so young.

Seadog: What can I say? It’s either Vanilla Coke or strawberry shortcake.

Decade: Okay, the problem here is, I am blue. I have been cloned. I’ve got a white one over here and a red one over there. I remember when I came on to talk about the fakes. Can we run the clip?
Seadog: No. I don’t feel like it.

Decade: Whatever. Ty officially introduced the red Decade bear on his site this week, and with that, what’s Ty going to do now – produce me in every color in eternity until he can’t think of any more and goes ahead and retires me? How many damn Decades can you take? I mean, first blue, then white, now red… what about striped Decade? Pizza Decade? Fire Decade? I’m not a Neopet! Neopets are free with access to their website, which is very good, by the way, and us Beanies are $5.99! Some of us are as rare as those Cybunny mofos! I remember when every Beanie Baby was only one color. Another color wasn’t produced unless there was an inking error! This is no error! If it were an error, would all my variations have sparkles? I am accepting editorials on the subject. Thanks again.

Seadog: Decade, everybody!

Thoughts on the new USA exclusives… speculation from a Planet Beans reader says the red-faced Liberty Buddy will be most difficult to find of the three Libertys and the Red Beanie Baby will be harder to find than Red White & Blue. In other news, White and Blue are much, much more harder to find than Red White and Blue.

Managing director of the Chubbley Bears Darren Barker did the drawing for Sue Owen’s Cracker of a Draw winner, in an event broadcast on Sue’s website. All this and more on the new reality show “Most Embarrassing Behavior by Managing Directors in England”.

A presale auction for Dad-E 2003 came online this week. The bear looks like Pappa with a brown blend with a button like Mom-E 2003. That’s when I say, “Hey, Dad-E, you look a lot like your mama AND your papa!”

The founder of the McDonald’s Collectors Club has stated that prices in fast food toys have dropped as the years went by, with the Teenie Beanie Babies selling for as little as a quarter. Also selling for as little as a quarter: singing William Shatner dolls.

It was discovered this week that the Bloom Beanie Baby does not have any beans in her arms due to them pulling the weight of the flower she holds. In addition, it was also discovered Bloom needs to change her clothes because everyone thinks her current outfit looks gay.

On last week’s “Trading Spaces” Bongo and Congo made appearances as two guests were “monkeying around” with them, according to Kia Steave-Dickerson, the designer. Here now with an episode review is “Trading Spaces” fan and Ty retailer Leah Dorfman.

Leah Dorfman: Thanks, Seadog. I sat down to “Trading Spaces” last weekend at 8:00 P.M. instead of going to that chat room with Mr. Beanwell because Mr. Beanwell is a cheating liar who won’t give me his damn phone number.

Seadog: How many times are you going to talk about that?
Leah Dorfman: He cheated his way into getting me there and the sketches sucked!
Seadog: Well, at least they’re not half as bad as the current SNL cast.

Leah Dorfman: Okay, now on to the review: the episode was set in Orlando. You might remember Orlando because that’s in Florida, where Disney World is. I love Disney World. I think Disney World has better food than Mr. Beanwell’s chats.

Seadog: Um… great.

Leah Dorfman: In this episode, I liked Hilda Santo-Tomas better because she did four rooms, while Kia Dickerson, who saw the deal with the Beanies, I would give her appearance an 8. And Amy Wynn… the lovely Amy Wynn… it’s three chicks. I have to be single to get on the show or else my boyfriend would cheat on me.

Seadog: No time like the present. Overall, what did you think of the show?
Leah Dorfman: All “Trading Spaces” shows are good. Sometimes I watch the soap channel, and it’s okay. But all Beanieday Night Live chats suck.

Seadog: Leah Dorfman, everybody! She hates us! She really does.

On Planet Beans, Sharon Nowell from North Carolina shared her collecting story with Lisa, saying that Beanie Babies still rule. I believe her, but with two competitors and one we beat, let’s just say for now, hail to the sheep.

Barbara Clark, a collector in England, recently told a Scunthorpe website that since buying two Ty bears at a gift shop in Toronto, it sparked her interest in collecting Beanie Baby bears. The Canadian bears will be treated for SARS as soon as possible.

A Planet Beans reader purchased Bubbles and Radar Beanie Babies on eBay and discovered they were counterfeit. When asked to comment, the reader said, “You can tell because their asses aren’t supposed to be this big.”

On Wednesday, Info Beanie/cast member Mother learned about Benjamin Franklin after a failed attempt to fly a kite. Pretty funny, because the next Info Beanie will learn about Thomas Edison when Ty’s lights go out, the phone stops working, and Ty’s video camera… well, also stops working. Ugh, I can’t think of any more Thomas Edison jokes.

The top baby names for 2002 are Emily and Jacob. The Top Beanie name for 2002: Champion, with 32 different Beanies named him. It replaces the chart-topper for 2001, Issy.

With the Dusty Beanie Baby released and retired on game day, many fans are happy and discouraged about the Dusty Beanie Baby. Here with us now are two lucky fans that got Dusty Beanie Babies at the Cubs game on Sunday, Dustin and Michael Barber.

Dustin Barber: Thanks, Seadog. We really enjoyed the ball game on Sunday. The Cubs beat the Rockies and they won their seventh series.

Seadog: Did you get the Beanie Baby?
Michael Barber: Um, no. My mom did a search in our bedrooms and stole the bears from us to sell online.

Dustin Barber: She’s crazy. She says the two of us are going to have bank accounts soon.

Michael Barber: I hate the bank, so why get a bank account?
Seadog: Now, I just want to ask, seriously, one thing – why would a woman give birth to both a hippo and a dog?
Dustin Barber: I’m a dog. I just look like a hippo now because my ears shrunk and my belly’s big. I shouldn’t have eaten so many hot dogs at Wrigley Field.

Michael Barber: I kept telling you that, but you wouldn’t listen.

Seadog: Oh, I understand you guys. I’m a dog too. So, I’ll give you my Dusty Beanie Babies that I bought off eBay with all the money I made during my comedy tour.

Dustin Barber: Oh, thank you!

Michael Barber: How can I repay you? Mow your lawn? Do your dishes? Anything, sir!
Mr. Barber: Boys… boys, why did you disobey me and talk to a stranger?
Dustin Barber: He gave us the Beanies we lost.

Mr. Barber: Now, now. Your mother told me to give her any Dustys you find so that she can sell them online. Now we’re going home and I’m going to slap you silly.

Seadog: Um, I think I should call the Animal Cruelty Board or something.

Mr. Barber: Hmm, I don’t know about that…

Seadog: The Barber family, everyone! That’s the news; good night and have a pleasant tomorrow!