~The Curly Show~

Woody as Curly

Flaky as 1999 Holiday Teddy

Smitten as Sakura

Sidekick as Dogbear

Announcer: You’re watching B! Bear Television. Coming up next, “The Curly Show”.

Curly: It’s the only late night talk show for the bears, by the bears, hosted by a bear, “The Curly Show”! Hey, it’s me, Curly the bear again. So what about this hibernation? I mean, why are all you bears sleeping so long? Sure, it may be cold outside, but it’s warm in this tree – I got heating! Why don’t I hear any laughing? Okay, let’s read something from the newspaper: “Next week Punxsutawn-E Phil will wake up and see his shadow, and if he does, six more weeks of winter.” Come on now, six more weeks? If two groundhogs saw their shadow we’d have twelve more weeks of winter! I can’t stand this cold weather! I’m only up because my mom didn’t catch me yet! I won’t be able to stay up to watch the Super Bowl tomorrow! But it’s not even worth it since the Bears aren’t in it! Okay, time to welcome our first guest. He’s the MC Hammer of Beanie Baby bears, please welcome, 1999 Holiday Teddy!

’99 Holiday: Good evening, Curly.

Curly: So, I hear you got a degree in marine biology?
’99 Holiday: No, I’m still in middle school.

Curly: Just asking, ‘cause you ain’t smart! Ha-ha! Okay, do you think Punxsutawn-E Phil will see his shadow?
’99 Holiday: With recent snowstorms I believe it will be a cloudy day and there will be an early spring.

Curly: Oh, thank god! I can’t take another minute of this cold! I can’t take another minute of my mom saying, “Curly, come back to bed and don’t wake up until March 21!” Three months of sleep? The most I can sleep is three hours! Anyway, How long do you sleep during hibernation?
’99 Holiday: Well, each day I sleep for a few hours, then eat, then go back to sleep, then drink, then go back to sleep. But, I stay up for “Will and Grace” on Thursdays.

Curly: Hmm. Tell me, what is your favorite color for other bears you’re attracted to?
’99 Holiday: Why?
Curly: Out of curiosity.

’99 Holiday: Pink.

Curly: Phew. Anyway, if you like pink bears, get ready for our next guest, the star of the new Japanese reality show, “Tae Kwon Yes or Tae Kwon No?” please welcome, Sakura!

Sakura: Hi, Curly. Hello, Holiday Teddy Pie.

Curly: Wow, she likes you, she likes you! Okay, Sakura, tell us about “Tae Kwon Yes or Tae Kwon No?”

Sakura: It’s like a Japanese version of “Survivor”, with contestants trapped in a karate camp with nothing to eat but sushi, and those who get on people’s nerves can be voted out.

Curly: And you’re the host?
Sakura: Yes. The only bad thing is everyone will have a crush on me.
Curly: Hmm, yeah. So, what do you think of hibernation?
Sakura: Since I’m from the Southern Hemisphere, I don’t hibernate until July.

Curly: Well, if you traveled all the way here, you’d be sleeping right now. Trust me, you don’t want to stay awake in the cold.

Sakura: I know. I don’t blame you.

Curly: Not to mention, why three months of sleep? When I was little I hated to sleep! I’m a party bear!

Sakura: Then why don’t you come down to Japan whenever you can afford it?
Curly: No problem. Thanks for coming out.

Sakura: You’re welcome.

Curly: Okay, next topic: that new Beanie Twitterbug. There are so many of them, I’d rather buy them and eat them! I could really go for some Twitterbug right about now. But I can’t since we need to talk to our last guest; he is a currently unreleased Beanie Baby who is being revised by Ty, please welcome Dogbear!
Dogbear: Good evening, Curly.

Curly: Now, when are you going to be released as an authentic Beanie Baby?
Dogbear: 2015.

Curly: You’re a cross between a dog and a bear?
Dogbear: Yes. I’ve got the head and feet of a dog but the body and fur of a bear. I’m not a genetic mutation.

Curly: Do you hibernate?
Dogbear: What’s hibernation?

Curly: Oh, yeah, I forgot… you were born yesterday!

Dogbear: Actually, Ty said my real birthday will be January 24, 3003.

Curly: Can you bark for me?
Dogbear: Bow-bark!

Curly: Can you say “bow-wow”?
Dogbear: Woof-wow!
Curly: Dud. Well, I can’t waste my time anymore, so I’m just going to end the show here. Go back home, and don’t come back to my show because you haven’t got a brain. See you next time on “The Curly Show”!