David Wayne's Comedy?

Hey, what are you doing here? Long time, no see. How did you get here? Hit a wrong button while trying to maneuver through a porno site? Whatever the reason, I'm glad you're here. Pull up a chair and stay awhile. I'm Dave. I live in Southern Mississippi. Shut up, stop laughing, its a nice, friendly state, full of southern hospitality. Just because I want to get the hell out of here, doesn't mean its a bad place. I'm an aspiring stand-up comic. I love to make other people laugh. Especially while they're eating. That's just fun to watch. There's not many things funnier than watching cornbread fly out of someone's nose. This site is just here for me to have a place to put some of my idiotic writing. Hope you enjoy reading. If you don't enjoy reading it, hit your "back" button and go back to your porno site. DAve

This is me, and to answer your question, No, I'm never focused.

Dear Lisa, The days seem endless while you're away. I long for sleep so that tomorrow, one day closer to you, will come quickly. It was an unpleasant surprise to hear of your recent ordeal.I hope that your therapist will be able to help you cope with your fears. Having been in a similar situation a few years ago, my heart goes out to you. However, it was Goofy that traumatized me, not Mickey. Seeing them for years on television, and even on the lunchbox I carried to school every day, didn't even begin to prepar me for how Freakin' Huge they really are in real life!

In Mom's Backyard..

On my first visit to DisneyWorld, I was just walking around minding my own business, adjusting my Mickey ears and trying desperately to find a bathroom, when all of a sudden, towering over me like a redwood tree was this huge furry thing. My head only came up to around its knees, and it took me a few seconds gathering my wits, to realize I could hear my Mom calling my name. Dave, it's only Goofy. Goofy? What's goofy? That I no longer need to find that bathroom? No, she said, It's Goofy! Oh, it's Goofy. Well, if he would stop hugging me long enough so that I could remove my face from his crotch, I could have seen that for myself. I ended up having my picture made with him, but I still have nightmares about a big piece of orange carpet attacking me. I hope you're not mad at me about the get well card. I swear I didn't know it had a pop-up Mickey inside it. When I purchased it, I was in a hurry. It said Get Well, and that's what I was aiming for, so I grabbed it. Tell your Mom I'm sorry. Once you're able to talk again, I hope you give me a call. Maybe we can get together and look at your vacation pictures.

Even though you didn't get a lot of pictures, maybe the ones your Dad took of Mickey helping the paramedics load you into the ambulance turned out well. I can't wait to sign your arm cast!! Take care,......dave

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Have a Thought? A Question... Or just want to leave me a piece of your mind?

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