Not a creature was stirring not even a mouse.
The rooms were dark and the halls were barren,
Except for one boy, except for one Aaron.
There he waited by the Christmas tree
thinking "ha ha ha, this'll be a breeze!"
With a small jingle, Santa came down on the roof
And down the chimmeny with one small poof.
Santa saw the boy and jumped back with his face very red
But the boy calmly talked, and this is what he said:
"Hey big man come and give me a kiss"
"You should spank me too cause i'm on the naughty list"
Santa stumbled forward (with a beard like Sean Connery)
His hands outstreched aching for sodomy.
Santa went in with a smile on his face.
All he wanted was to get to first base.
All of a sudden Santa was hit by a shoe!
"Hey you fat bastard, that one's for the Jews!!!!"
When he fell to the floor Aaron kicked him in the crotch.
"Thats for the pony that i never got"
Aaron climbed to the roof and into the sleigh.
He flew all night and crashed it in Maine.
Santa went to the police and threw a big fit
There wasn't enough evidence so the judge had to acquit.
There's a lesson to this story and i'll tell you right now
Listen up and listen good you big red cow.
Tomorrow i'd better find a pony and hay,
Or so help me god your ass is gonna pay.
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Aaron Pollard's weblog where this was filched from