The following document was taken from ftp.ee.cau.edu/camerabot/mst3k and was published with permission by the author.
- Sharon A. Ferrell
Inside the Head of Cambot
Busy filming the show, the mysterious and rarely seen Cambot is barely known by anyone outside of the Satellite of Love. What many don’t know about Cambot is that he is very intelligent, despite the fact that he can’t talk or riff like Tom or Crow. We were able to get a hold of him one day and we tried to arrange an interview with him. He can’t talk, so it’d just be silly to interview him orally, as we managed to remember just before we made a fool of ourselves. But, being the kind generous bot that he is, he agreed to write a short article for us on his view of the predicament.
-Lillian "Rockerbot" Dakota, official ccorrespondent of the National Society of Camerabots
Pan left, focus, record…. writing isn’t really one of the commands I get often. Generally I have a lot of free time so I’d always be glad to answer questions from anyone, as long as it’s not oral. I’m just not really used to anyone wanting my opinion or anything, and sometimes I doubt if people think I really have one. To some it may just be due to the simple fact that I’m a robot, but to most it’s probably because I can’t talk. It doesn’t really get me down, although it does exclude me from some activities and it can be often quite lonely. Usually when the experiments are not going on I accompany Gypsy, who’s always willing to let me tag along and keep me company and vice versa. She’s always has been good to me and I’m thankful for her companionship and sympathy. But still, I still often feel like an outcast because I’m usually left out of a lot of the activities on the SOL, like projects, coming up with a new invention exchange when Joel’s there, or just talking. I don’t get talked to a lot outside of the experiments and it hurts sometimes. Just because I can’t talk doesn’t mean I don’t want to be talked to. But I’m okay with that now. (After years and years of online therapy…just kidding.)
I’ve generally been put through a lot over the years, not to imply that’s a negative thing, of course not. It’s been good, mostly, and the worst thing that happened to me was when the rest of the bots freaked out after Experiment #512 and I was knocked out by Gypsy. After that, I was almost completely rebuilt, something that took a while to get used to, but the truly bad thing about that particular experiment was that Joel left. I miss him terribly, for he was so wonderful to all of us and made the experiments more tolerable. He had such a familial relationship with us and that’s something you really can’t replace. Now don’t get me wrong, Mike’s been wonderful to us, but he’s just sort of like a best friend or something. It’s nothing personal, different is just different. Joel never wanted to leave us, but Mike is always trying to come up with some kind of escape plan, and that hurts sometimes, even if he says he wants to free us as well. The SOL is our home, and it feels like he’s insulting it when he tries to leave a little bit. Sure, he has to watch bad movies here, but he doesn’t have to pay bills or anything. I don’t want to force my opinion on him though, I understand that he might want to go home, his own home. Joel made a home out of the SOL and would’ve never wanted to leave. I understand his leaving wasn’t his own decision, and I wish he hadn’t. Spending almost a year in the outback with civilization nowhere in sight must be draining on a human, not to mention a bit traumatizing. Despite what the Mads said, I don’t think there’s such a thing as being safe in the Australian Outback.
Well, it’s getting late, and Dr. Forrester is going to call soon. His mother is staying with him now that Frank’s gone. Imagine that. Dr. Forrester is now being tormented by her day and night. Serves him right, the jerk. I still feel that I’ll be spending a long time up here…
Editor’s Note: Although the experiments may be going on for a long time, the company that carries the show’s feed will not be editing the experiments any longer for television broadcast. As for Dr. Forrester, he was not available for comment on the situation.
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Copyright info: Yeah, there is no such thing as the National Society of Camerabots. It’d be kinda cool if there was, since it’d be fully possible that a robot like Cambot would exist. (And my role play character would exist too!) Oh yeah, Cambot and the rest are characters from MST3k and are copyrights of Best Brains. Don’t worry, I’m not mean to ‘em, in fact I probably made Cambot more popular than ever.