Disclaimer: Paramount owns all, no infringement intended. The song "And So It Goes," belongs to Billy Joel.

And So It Goes

by Holly

In every heart there is a room

A sanctuary safe and strong

To heal the wounds from lovers past

Until a new one comes along

He was always there for me, no matter how much I pushed him away. He stood by my side and always helped me through it all.

I spoke to you in cautious tones

You answered me with no pretense

And still I feel I said too much

My silence is my self defense

He was my closest friend, the closest I've ever had and ever will have. Yet I tried to keep a barrier between us. When I felt we were getting too close, when I felt he was getting to know me too well, I pushed him away. But now that I think about it, he already knew me, more than I knew myself. Yet I still pushed. He never said anything about it though, not once did he question.

And every time I've held a rose

It seems I only felt the thorns

And so it goes, and so it goes

And so will you soon I suppose

He gave me a rose once, then we went sailing. A few days later I held the rose, and hated myself for doing what I had just done, for pushing him away once again. I started to wonder just how much more I could push him before he finally left. Finally I realized that I was a lost cause. But I guess he didn't feel the same, he held me in greater esteem than I did myself.

But if my silence made you leave

Then that would be my worst mistake

So I will share this room with you

And you can have this heart to break

I never did tell him how I truly felt. I finally started to let the barriers fall. Yet I still didn't tell him. I wish I had now.

And this is why my eyes are closed

It's just as well for all I've seen

And so it goes, and so it goes

And you're the only one who knows

I stood there, looking at his limp body, laying on the bio bed. The Doctor had done everything he could, but it just wasn't enough. Of course I blame myself for his death, if only I hadn't sent him on the away mission.

So I would choose to be with you

That's if the choice were mine to make

But you can make decisions too

And you can have this heart to break

If I could change everything I would. I would have dealt with my fears, I would have bared my heart and my soul to you. But now I'll never know what could have been. If you would have broken my heart or have held it tight and never let go.

And so it goes, and so it goes

And you're the only one who knows

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