Was it that doubt?
The possibility you created?
The ideas that ran through your head?
Like, if you really knew,
Then you wouldn't know me.
Or the guilt that,
If you really knew me,
Then you would have known.
And you closed your eyes.
Like I did.
To see if it would go.
And you open them again.
Like I did.
To what you now know.
You see the same faces.
The same demons
The same memories
The things that only one thing erases.
You finally see.
Suddenly you're afraid of me.
Afraid of how right I was all along.
Afraid of your accusations.
That now prove to be false.
Afraid of what you've caused me.
Afraid of everything else.
You see this now,
But not on my level.
You will never know.
You won't know what pain
Causes such fantastical things.
You won't know what pain
Thier defensive actions cause.
You won't know why I didn't want you to understand.
And you won't know me like you want to.
You will never know.
Because you give up and fold.
You let yourself run away.
Even though you see now.
How I kept myself here.
Even though you know,
I often wonder why I never ran.
You think you have followed me down the path.
Truthfully, you've hardly begun.
It has all followed me.
In secrecy.
It won't wait for you.
