Redneck Computer Lingo


"Hard drive" -- Trying to climb a steep, muddy hill with 3 flat tires 
                and pulling a trailer load of fertilizer.

"Keyboard" ---- Place to hang your truck keys. 

"Window" ------ Place in the truck to hang your guns. 

"Floppy" ------ When you run out of Polygrip. 

"Modem" ------- How you got rid of your dandelions. 

"ROM" --------- Delicious when you mix it with coca cola. 

"Byte" -------- First word in a kiss-off phrase. 

"Reboot" ------ What you do when the first pair gets covered with 
                barnyard stuff.

"Network" ----- Activity meant to provide bait for your trot line. 

"Mouse" ------- Fuzzy, soft thing you stuff in your beer bottle in 
                        order to get a free case.

"LAN"  -------- To borrow as in, "Hey Delbert! LAN me yore truck." 

"Cursor" ------ What some guys do when they are mad at their wife 
                       and/or girlfriend.

"bit" --------- A wager as in, "I bit you can't spit that watermelon 
                     seed across the porch longways."

"digital control" -- What yore fingers do on the TV remote. 

"packet" ------ What you do to a suitcase or Wal-Mart bag before a trip 

IT'S BEEN A SLOW DAY...



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Nothing but Jokes by Nauman Faridi