Deep, deep…

tsmrhara

Deep, deep

Part 5

 

 

Toshiya was sleeping soundly beside Kaoru. Maybe he could feel someone sleeping beside him or maybe he had not been sleeping well since he broke up with Die. How comfortable it was to have someone accompanying him, it just feel so good. Toshiya stirred his body closer to that person, he wanted to feel the warm from that person. It had been a long time since and he had almost forgot how nice it was to have someone beside him.

 

“ Great…!” Kaoru mumbled, looking at the sleeping bassist beside him. “ Now I’m sleeping with my friend ex-lover!?”

 

Kaoru slowly stands up from the bed not wanting to wakes the bassist up so that he could sneak away, maybe!? He thought maybe the bassist wouldn’t know who the person was and he could save all sort of trouble to explain anything. Softly, Kaoru puts on his clothes and left the hotel room leaving the sleeping bassist behind.

 

 

 

Toshiya woke up from his dream; he was sweating all over. A moment ago, he felt so comfortable, dreaming of Die hugging and kissing him and the very next moment, Die push him away and left him behind. He was left all alone again and it was so frightening. Toshiya sits up from the bed, he hug his long leg and rest his head on the knee.

 

Die…

 

Tears were dripping down his smooth cheek. He looks around the room; it was so empty and so cold. Where’s the warm had gone, please don’t leave me alone here! But he knows he had come back to reality, the cruel reality.

 

“ All of you are the same… treating me like a slut. Sleep with me, enjoy my body and left me!” The strong hatred rises again.

 

Toshiya narrow his eyes, he get down the bed and have a shower before leaving the hotel. So many times he wanted to give up his revenge but this thought no longer exist in his mind at this moment now.

 

First I wants to ruin Shinya followed by…

 

that fucking Die…

 

and I won’t forget you too…

 

Kaoru!!

 

 

 

 

 

The studio was unusually quiet today. Kyo has fallen asleep on the table; Kaoru was busy with his composing, Die was ‘busy’ smoking, Shinya was concentrating on his drum set and Toshiya was trying his best to keep clam before he ruin his chance to get revenge. All of them seem busy but in their mind, they are all thinking about their personal affair except for their vocalist who is really sleeping.

 

Kaoru was anxious or may as well say he is feeling guilt. He dared not look at the bassist, he is afraid that Toshiya will know that person is him. He didn’t know why he is feeling afraid, maybe he thought it will be troublesome to give any explanation nor did he wants the red head to know he had sleep with the bassist. But why he’s doing this? He already know Die and Toshiya had broke up… maybe I’m selfish!

 

Shinya secretly take a glance at the red head then to the bassist. Now their relationship was in a mess and all this was his fault. He had agreed to be Toshiya’s lover but his heart was with Die. Die getting mad at him for his decision and ignored him. Toshiya starts to behave like his lover, touching and kissing him whenever he feels like it.

 

Die’s mood changes from bad to worse and he starts to smoke continually even though he knows the drummer dislike it. He had saw Shinya and Toshiya kissing in the studio earlier on when no one is around. He would have dash into the room and whack the bassist up but he didn’t because he knows this will only upset the drummer even more.

 

I must settle it with Toshiya alone!

 

 

 

 

Shinya was sitting in the room alone thinking of his problem with Die and Toshiya while the others had gone out for lunch. Die had gone out with Kyo, the bassist and their leader was also out but of course not together. He felt so frustrated now, he wants to talk to the red head but he know once they talk, the topic will automatically turn to the bassist and they would end up quarreling again.

 

Now he is regret. Maybe what the red head said is right, he should not agree to the bassist’s request. He is lying to the bassist again, he don’t love him but had agreed to be the bassist’s lover. What will happen to the bassist if he happened to tell him the truth that he don’t love him, he only agreed to be his lover because he want to put up his guilt.

 

This will hurt him even more. Toshiya, I’m sorry…

 

Tears were forming in the drummer’s eyes. He didn’t expected his decision might hurt the bassist even worse, now he had think of it but it was too late. He can’t possibly walk to the bassist and tell him the truth. Now he is struck, he can’t take a step forward or backward because either of them will hurt the bassist.

 

 

“ Shin-chan.”

 

Shinya quickly wipe away the tear that is already dripping down from his cheek when he heard someone calling him. He turns around to the direction of the door where the voice came from and saw the bassist standing there looking at him.

 

Toshiya!?

 

“ Are you alright?” The bassist asked while waking toward the drummer.

 

“ I’m alright…” Shinya nod his head. “ Why are you back so fast?”

 

“ I bought you some food, I don’t believe you’re not hungry. Aren’t you?” Toshiya said with a smile and open out the food for his ‘lover’.

 

“ You specially bought this back for me?”

 

Toshiya nod his head and take a sit in front of the drummer. They ate the food together, talking sometime but were almost quiet. Toshiya was concentrating on his food as what the drummer had thought. Shinya secretly take a few glance at the bassist while they were eating, he thought how wonderful it will be if he hasn’t snatch Die away from him. Maybe now he and Toshiya will become really good friend, friend who is honest to one another.

 

 

 

  

 

Kaoru walks to the studio slowly; he had bought back some food for the drummer. Actually, he decides to discuss his problem with the drummer. He believed that Shinya would be the right person whom he can tell his problem to and of course the drummer might give him some advise on what he should do. Although Shinya is the youngest members of the band, he is also the one who is more mature than anyone of them and this is what Kaoru had thought.

 

Kaoru narrows his eyes. He was standing outside the studio where he heard peoples talking inside. He thought he is back early and didn’t expect the others to be back also. Now he missed his chance to talk to the drummer, maybe later he thought. He was about to enter the studio when he heard Toshiya name begins called. He stopped automatically.

 

 

 

 

“ Toshiya, please don’t…” Shinya pled.

 

The drummer was pushing the bassist away when the bassist wants to further their ‘action’. Toshiya was lying on top of the drummer, trying to unbutton his blouse. Shinya didn’t want to have sex especially when the other half is not the one he loves and further on, he can’t possibly have it in the studio. He can’t held to see the sadness in the bassist’s eyes when he reject the bassist kiss but he didn’t expect the bassist to further his action.

 

“ Why Shinya? You don’t love me?”

 

“ No but…”

 

Shinya wanted to stop Toshiya but he did not finish his sentences. His heartache, his guilt rises again. The bassist’s eyes had reddened and tears were forming around those beautiful eyes.

 

“ Not here please Toshiya.”

 

“ You’re shy don’t you?” Toshiya said and get up of the drummer. “ Sorry Shinya, I don’t mean to force you.” 

 

“ It alright Toshiya. Please don’t cry.” Shinya said and wipe the tear that is dripping down Toshiya’s cheek away. “ I love you…”

 

I lied again! I lied to you again, please forgive me Toshiya…

 

“ I love you too!” Toshiya reply coldly as the drummer didn’t see his expression.

 

 

 

 

 

Kaoru was still standing outside the room. He had heard everything the drummer and bassist had said. Suddenly he felt relief because he had not told the drummer about his problem. And now he doesn’t understand what is happening.

 

Aren’t Die and Shinya together now? Die didn’t told me he had broke up with Shinya…

 

But what’s going on with Shinya? What is he doing with Toshiya? What’s their relationship?

 

Lover, ex-lover, friend and what about me…!?

 

 

 

 

To be continue

By Tsmrhara

 

Author: The fics starts to get longwinded again. ^__^;  Beg for feedback…!!

 

to be continue…

 

 

  back to deg fics page