The Bus 299

Waiting for the bus 299 in front of ATT, it seemed like that all memories were coming back to me; the saxophone, you and me.

I did the stupid thing again; stubbornly and patiently waiting the bus that seemed like it would never come. Although there were thousands of other buses I could take home, I persisted in waiting for the bus 299, for the unknown reasons.

There wasn't much change to the view here. The formula you created still worked:

The air pollution+ The traffic jam+ The unused rapid transit system= A sick Taipei city.

The blue fences were still here, the foreign laborers were still digging something that was dug for a long time. The woman who sold the chewing gum was still walking back and forth from Hilton to ATT. The only thing different was that I was waiting for the buss 299, without the company of you and my saxophone.

299 finally came. Just like it used to be, nearly all of the people got off the bus at this stop, so I could get on the bus slowly and still had seat to sit. Walking to the back of the bus and sat down, I looked around and found out everything that were familiar to me; the bus driver still wore his brown checked uniform, people still left their handwriting or drawing on the panel with correction fluid, the wind came out from the air conditioner still had the smells of gasoline, and just as what I expected, the advertisement of "The pioneer of music" were still on the advertising panel in every 299, on which with a sketch of an alto saxophone that lured me to buy the first saxophone of mine, also the last one.

All it happened in my sophomore year summer vacation, I was doing the part-time job in the Kinokuniya bookstore. During that time, I was crazily falling in love with jazz music; spending a lot of time to watch the relay of New Orleans jazz festival on TV, sinking myself into the music of jazz.

"I want to buy a saxophone." I told my parents.

"No," they said.

My parents were very stubborn. But I was stubborn, too. You should know it came from my parents. I never make concession.

And then one day I saw the advertisement of "The pioneer" in 299, I told myself, "I was going to buy one."

"May I help you?" when I walked into "The pioneer" unconsciously,

one man asked.

“Oh," just liked wake up in the dream, I said, " I want to buy a saxophone."

"Yes, this way please." He showed me all kinds of saxophone then and introduced various types of them.

I didn't really hear what he said, because one of the soprano kept on speaking to me, "Buy me, please. Please buy me."

"I would like to take this one." I interrupted that man's introduction. He was speechless with his eyes and month wild open. So that's it, two minutes and a deal.

Three days later, I had my saxophone and met you; a teacher of saxophone and guitar, a short story writer, with a long hair and the age the same with me.

"When did you born?" You asked me at the break time of first class.

"March 17, why?"

"No kidding! I was three days older than you; the Pisces, too." And you took out your horoscope theory and told me that the Pisces can always get along well with Pisces.

Well, maybe you are right. The relationship between you and me were growing up in an incredible way, as fast as my skill of playing saxophone progressed. You shared you secrets with me the second time we met, and showed me your diary. I was not sure why you let me read your diary, maybe you wanted to show me your talent of writing or let me know you better, I didn't know. But I did impressed with what you write. It didn't like something a 21 year old boy could write, nearly all the stories were sad and pessimistic. Reading you diary made me imagine you were a miserable old man who went through a lot of misfortune, but for Christ's sake, you were just 21 years old.

For learning to play the saxophone, I was a genius. Three times faster than your other students. So I exchange my soprano into alto saxophone, because at that time I really though I could be a professional female sax player, just like Candy Dulfer was. And I thought you were a little bit scare about someday you would have nothing to teach me.

You were scolded by your boss for allowing me to exchange the alto saxophone, and had a thought to quit. I begged of you not to quit, for the sake of us. I said "us" to mean all of your students whom couldn't afford to pay higher fee for other teachers, included me. But you misunderstood what I said and misinterpret "us" as "you and me."

"I stayed," you said, "for the sake of you." . But I assumed you said "you" to mean "all of you."

After that, I thought our relationship became closer and closer. Every time after the class, we would have dinner or late night snake together. And you would walk me to the bus station in front of ATT, waiting the bus 299. One time when I got on the bus from the front door, and walked to the back, I was so surprised you were already there, smiling at me and said, "hey, don't follow me." Since that, you gave me different surprise every time; told me you have to go early but appeared at the bus stop or rode your motorcycle to follow 299 just for saying good-bye when I got off the bus.

I told Mom about the tricks you did, Mom said you must be a paranoid or nut and wanted me to stay away from you. I really didn't know what to do, because I was a little bit scare, too.

Maybe I should tell you straightway I would never love you. Well, I admitted that for one or few SECONDS I was indeed attracted by you, but for most of the time, I took you as a good friend, a real good friend. And I was so sure about that we would never end up to be together. Because we were the person from different world. I was studying, while you were working. I was practical but you were dreamy. And the most important thing of all, you were too pessimistic, like the man of Qi who was haunted by the fear that the sky might fall, or someone who moans and groans without being ill.

Lee was totally different from you.

One day, your boss assigned you to teach the guitar class and had Lee to be my substitute teacher.

"Lee was a nice person if people ignored his over-proud of himself," I recalled the words you once told me.

But I thought it was exactly the characteristic that Lee attracted people. His too much confidence made everything he said and everything he did shiny, and I liked that. His happy-go-lucky character made him a strong contrast with your fatalism.

I remembered it was an extremely hot afternoon, even the air conditioner didn't have much use to the high temperature, and I used the tissue paper to wipe up the sweat on my face constantly. But in order not to interfere other classes; the flute class and the violin class that were next and opposite to us, we still have to stay in the small room with the door closed, Lee and I.

You think you are good, don't you? I thought when the first sight I saw him.

Yes, he was good. It just liked that he had some kind of power or magic to make people laugh, and I was happy to be with him.

By the time the class was finished and I was dismantling my saxophone into pieces and putting them back into the case, Lee kept on looking at me. I pretended not find out that he was looking at me, but I can feel my body was trembling.

" Hey, there is something on your face," he spoke at last.

" What?" I knew I blushed, because the skin on my face and neck was hot .

"Here," he pointed the area near the corner of his mouth.

"Here?" I kept on wiping my face with my hand.

"No," Lee leaned his body to me and pick it up, "here it is." That is one small piece of tissue paper.

Both of us laughed. And you came in at that moment, seeing "everything" although there was nothing happened at all.

You were jealous. I knew you were jealous. Later on when you walked me to the bus station, you didn't utter a word while I was excitedly talking about Lee this and Lee that. Finally you spoke,

" Are you thinking about changing another teacher?"

" What do you mean?" I said with my eyes wild-opened.

" Lee is a good teacher, isn't him?"

" Yes, he is a nice person." I answered with confusion.

Then the bus 299 came, ended our unfinished conversation. And I was surprised you didn't do the old trick on that day. After that, when every time I mentioned Lee, you would take out your horoscope theory again , explained again and again about that the horoscope of Lee is Leo and Leo never gets along well with Pisces or something like that. It made me mad at last.

"Can you just stop explaining everything with horoscope? It's all bullshit." One night when we had our dinner in Kentucky I said. Before that you were talking about the person of Leo liked to show off.

I looked away to avoid your expression but still saw your upset face that was reflected on the glass of window. I was a little bit regret about what I said to you, until then I realized you were just jealous, you were jealous of Lee's talent of making people feel happy. Otherwise you were still a nice person, and a good friend of mine.

But it seemed like you want to cut the relationship of friends with me. You quit in September, telling me you were going to leave for a while.

"Where are you going?" I asked.

"Pang-Hu."

"What are you going to do?"

"Several friends and I are going to build an Art Village over there."

"How long do you plan to stay there?"

"I don't know, probably till I finish my first book."

And that was the last conversation we had. I didn't bag of you to stay, because I didn't want to.

Then I was back to the real life again, devoted myself to the school life. But sometimes I did think of you, I would go to the bookstores to see if your novel had been published or not. I wanted to see if I was one of the characters in your story. If I was, I hoped you wouldn't describe me as a real bad girl. If I was, I would know that now you are probably seeking another character for your new story. But your book never showed up on the shelves in bookstores. I was a little bit disappointed and happy, too.

As for the saxophone, maybe my parents were right. It was just another one of my momentary

whims. Now it stayed in the storeroom with my stamp albums, the basketball, the roller-skate, the fishing-equipment and all the others.

Today I went to the cram school to have my journalism class. On the way home, I determined to take 299 home for the unknown reasons. Maybe I was expecting you would show up in the back seat of the bus, but you didn't.

"Good afternoon, this is the two o'clock news." That was the news came from the radio broadcast.

"A house in Taichung was on fire because of gas exploding. Nine people were dead, five people were seriously injured.........."

Nobody on the bus expressed his or her sympathy. The students sit next to me were still happily chatting. A mother was scolding her crying kids. The bus driver was cursing the traffic-jam. It seemed like no one feel a thing about the disaster happened in Taichung. I felt cold at that moments, and I thought that was the real life situation.

It also made me realized that 299 was probably the only thing that was real to me, and it ran through all the memories of you and the days of my dreaming becoming a professional sax player.

Remember I used to ask you why you write the letters in your diary? Now I know the reason. Because I also put the words I would like to talk to you in my diary, and I know this is the letter I will never mail to you.