| To Chris To Chris, the one who always made me laugh: Even though being ten years younger that you, you always treated me as if we were the same age. Maybe because in your mind we were. I thank you for that. You didn't make me feel like a worthless fourteen year old when you were old enough to be my teacher. I felt that I had something to brag about when I had a twenty-four year old best friend that my Mom didn't disagree of. No other kid could beat that. It made me feel on top of the world. I could always go to you when I needed a good laugh. Even if I was mad at you, you'd always bug me until I gave in. You helped keep me going all those years. Laughter is-was the best medicine and you were the best doctor to prescribe it. You could always get out of trouble by telling a joke or simply being yourself. Did I ever tell you the real reason I got the corn rows put in my hair? Besides saying that I wanted to hide my curls? It was you. In some odd way, I looked up to you. When you got rid of the dreads for good, I thought that there was no crazy guy left. Then Joey did the red hair. But did anyone realize that he only dyed it once? Just one time. It lasted a long while didn't it? By the time the color was gone, I had the fro. What was wrong with me? Why didn't ya'll ever cut it while I was sleeping? Then I put the corn rows in, because I guess I missed braided hair. But locks on me? That would have been horrible. Next best thing? Cornrows. I wanted to be like my best friend. You were, and maybe you still are, one of the craziest people in the whole world. A damn fine basketball player too. (But not better than me) If I would have known that the group would have broken up so soon, I would have spent more time with you and the others. We all should have been blood brothers. And honestly, if I would have known that Nsync would have ended so ugly and messy, I never would have joined. I never would have fallen in love with the music like I did. We ended so suddenly. I just keep thinking and wishing that I wouldn't have gone to that club. Then maybe nothing would have happened with that girl and I wouldn't be a father. Not that I don't love Jordan. She's my daughter. She means the whole world to me. But I wasn't ready to be a daddy. I had just turned twenty. Just a few days after my birthday. Then nine months later, came my little girl. One your birthday too. And you were the one telling me to step up to the plate and be a responsible father. So I did, I married Beck and we had a baby girl. But, Chris, I don't love my wife. She was a one night stand that turned me into a dad. I never meant for that to happen. I can't do it anymore, Chris. Jordan won't remember me. Which I find good. How can you miss someone that you never even knew? I guess that's all I have to say. Take care of Danielle. I love ya, man. Thank-you for all that you did for me. I'll never forget. Your old band mate, Justin Timberlake |