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| [7:00 am, Nsync’s Hotel Room] Chris: JC, get up. We have a meeting with our manager. JC: Now? (Looks at watch) I’ve only been sleeping for 17 hours. Don’t they understand that I need my sleep! Stupid meanie! [Chris smacks JC in the head with his dreads] JC: Thanks man, I needed that. You wake up Joey; I’ll get Lance. [Chris walks to Joey’s bed and hears him talking in his sleep] Joey: It’s a bird…it’s a plane...no, it’s SuperJoey! Able to go clubbing all night- Chris: Moron! Joey, get up! Joey: Huh? Momma? Chris: It’s Chris. You know, the 27 years old college graduate adored by preteens everywhere. Joey: Huh? Whatever. Is it lunchtime? Chris: No. It’s only 7 am. Joey: Oh! Happy Hour! Chris: Just shut up and get dressed. [Over at Lance’s bed] JC: Lance get up. Lance: JC! Go away! You can’t see me without any make-up on. Oh my! My hair must be a mess. JC: Whatever, man. I’m leaving. [All the guys, except for Justin who’s in the bathroom, are eating in the room] Joey: I wish Justin would hurry up. I have to be back by 4. My kids are going to call. [Justin walks in] Joey: Finally! Chris: Yeah, we thought you had fallen in. Justin: Shut the beep up, you beep. Y’all are so beep beep stupid. Leave me alone. You beep beep! [Justin sits and eats his cereal] Justin: Hey Joe, nice shirt. Can I borrow it sometime? Chris, could you please pass me the milk? JC: And some people don’t believe us when we say he’s grumpy until he’s had his cereal. Justin: We should get going. We’re going to be late. [The guys meet with their manager] Manager: Do you guys have any questions? Joey: (raises his hand) I do! I do! Pick me! Oh, pick me! Manager: Joey, what? Joey: Can I tell people about my kids? I really do love them, and I want to share it with the world. Manager: No. Joey: Ok. JC: I’d like to know if we could change our schedule so that we get 22 hours of sleep. Manager: No. JC: Lousy good for nothing little- [Chris smacks JC in the head with his dreads] JC: Thanks Justin: Can we get rid of Britney yet? Manager: Yes [Everyone jumps for joy] Lance: Can I break up with Danielle? Please, I beg you. (starts to cry) Please! Manager: No. In fact, I’ve scheduled a date for the two of you tomorrow. Lance: AHHH! (runs out of the room) Manager: Well, bye boys. Gotta run. Remember stay single or lie about it. Chris: Someone should check on Lance. JC: Yeah, we should. [Nobody moves] Joey: Maybe later. [6 hours later. The guys are in the park playing basketball except for JC, it was his bedtime] Lance: Let’s quit playing basketball and play on the swings. Joey, Justin, and Chris: No! Lance: Fine! [30 minutes later. The guys go to the restroom except for Justin] Teenyboppers: Oh my gosh! Justin! Teenybopper #1: Justin, hi. Where’s Lance? Justin: Hi sweetie. He’s coming back. Do you want an autograph? Teenybopper #1: Whatever. When will he be back? Justin: Soon. You know Lance has a girlfriend. A celebrity girlfriend. I’m single and ready to mingle. I’m also a lead singer. Did you know I was voted the #1 hottest male star in numerous magazines? Lance didn’t even make the lists. Teenybopper #1: Yeah sure. Is that Lance: Oh my gosh! Lance! [Teenybopper #1 runs off] Justin: Man, she must be on some kind of drug. Pothead probably. That’s the only explanation. Teenybopper #2: Oh my gosh, Justin. Is JC here? Justin: No, he’s sleeping at the hotel. Do you want my autog- Teenybopper #2: What hotel? Justin: I can’t tell you that. How about I give you an autograph? I hear it’s worth a lot of money. Teenybopper #2: No. I think I’ll go search hotels for JC. [She runs off] Justin: The youth of America is so sad. Teenybopper #3: Oh my god! You’re Justin Randall Timberlake! I love you so much. You’re like a god. Can I have your autograph? Justin: Sure sweetie. Teenybopper #3: Oh my gosh, Justin just called me sweetie! I think I’m going to die! AHHH! I have to tell everyone I know. I love you so very much. Marry me or call me. Here’s my phone number. I can’t believe you’re him! [She runs off screaming “Justin!”] Justin: Such a sweet girl. At least she’s not a lost cause like those other girls. [9 pm. At the hotel] Joey: Well, I’m off clubbing. Justin: Dang Joey! Are your pants tight enough? Joey: No, but it’s all I have. Chris: It was a rhetorical question, nimrod. Joey: No big words. You know I didn’t graduate from grade school. Well, bye. [Joey leaves] Chris: I’m going to sleep. We have a concert tomorrow. Justin: Yeah, me too. (whispers to Chris) How dare you try to leave me with Lance? Lance: I’m going to watch TV. Don’t wake up JC. He’s only been sleeping for 8 hours and you know how he gets. [Lance watches TV but runs to bed in fear when an episode of Boy Meets World comes on] [11:35 pm] Lance: (sleep talking) No! Help me! No! Chris: Lance wake up! Lance: Man, I was having a nightmare. Chris: The one where you’re marrying Topanga or Danielle or whatever her name is? Lance: (shudders) Yeah, that one. Chris: That’s the 19th time this month. I feel your pain dude. I’d be scared too if I was dating ‘it’. Try to get some sleep. She can’t get you here. |
| A Normal Nsync Day |
| Author's note: This is really old. Like Lance is dating Topanga old. There are a lot of references to the things the guys used to say and do, so be familiar with your 'old school' Nsync. And oh yeah, this is not intended to bash any of the guys in Nsync (I would never do that to my boys); it's just a comical way at looking at them. No harm intended. |