"My love is like a red, red rose. It's painful and it will die soon, but you will willingly pay too much for it's passing beauty."

Darkness is one thing we shy away from. Then at times we embrace it like a lost child. Everyone has a darkside. To say that you do not is an unforgivable lie. To be able to control one's self isn't always the easiest thing to do. I don't personally believe in human weakness as a constant excuse for lack of discipline. Aside from control I'm here to talk about the lack there of. Inside of darkness lives and dies many a god. Wrapped up in the crying eyes of lost children lives all the evil one should ever embrace. To me children are the greatest evil I could ever fathom. Children are without a real conscious.

Children do not know or understand tomorrow and what it brings. They are fascinating and they live within us holding daggers of blind hate and self-destruction. Many of the mannerism one expresses outwardly are developed early on from the actions they see other humans do. They eventually adopt and accept these irrational acts as "normal." We always say they don't know better. I don't always believe that. The easy way to do things is not always the best. Having a problem with someone, the more banal man choose force to vanquish their foe instead of understanding to work life out.

Destruction is always there. Children do such things. Breaking down the feelings of others to bring themselves higher up within their own minds' eye. Beating the other children just because they can. Subdued by the ignorant, repetitive actions of the audio visual barrage that is TV. Irrational, over exaggerated actions taken laterally and given to children as more fodder for destruction. Gone is the real contact of a human. Replaced by distracting entertainment that parents can always use to blame.

Maybe if parent's cared enough about their kids, we could avoid ignorant violence. Again the easier choice was made. Lets blame everything but ourselves. It's not blood on my hands. Blood, excitement. The craze, and thrill of the moment. Finger off the trigger because I'm fresh out of bullets. A shovel strike to the back of the head and he never saw it coming. Rush in to me oh power and strength. It is what I take from the weak. Little fools didn't deserve to be on my turf. They don't belong here. I'll chase that one away. I'll hurt him and no one will say anything because he is not one of us.

He is worthless. I will always be better. To feel the control over this. The body is getting cold and I pulled out the serrated blade. Eyes still stare at me. I don't care I can stab those too. Old man isn't worth a passing glance. I want it all for myself. Just like it has always been. Just as it always will be. For me. If she is already asleep she won't remember. I know she won't wake up. If I close the door and run really fast, no one will see me. I can take it. I can take it all for my damn self. I know exactly where they keep it.

The door is never locked. I can take it again and I won't get caught. Darkness is familiar to me in my thoughts even if I don't engage in it much. I've seen enough of it. I know I will see more. I indulge in it's neon glow from time to time. Life is different for all of us so who am I to judge. I know and really like my darkness no matter how disturbing. I can't deny that the thought of a screwdriver sticking out of a freshly killed child's head isn't a part of my dreamscapes. I can't deny that I haven't wanted to slowly torture people just to watch them suffer inhuman amounts of pain.

There is another word. Inhuman. I think it's all just opinion. We do good things and why? Every child's' question. Why...? Well there I'm asking it again. To me I still believe that sin is a reward for being good. Could I ever be proven wrong. Things go up and down all the time in a life. We all make choices. Whatever that choice is, it will be judged not by myself or even by our earthly peers. I can't say for sure if what goes around really comes around, but I do know I am a darksider. I have nothing left to prove. Not to me and not to you.

"Sometimes you lose, sometimes you win...sometimes you're happy to find the one that makes you live in sin."

 

---Edward Nubius...E.N.D.

 

 

 

P.S. I don't love you...