WHERE IS EVERYBODY?

A FanFic by Kuroi Tenshi

Date: 03/13/01

Type: Yaoi/1x2/2x1/ Lemon/Rape/Violence/oh and songfic

Disclaimer: GW belongs to…some people I haven’t met, and if I met them I wouldn’t know what to say anyways…same goes for Mr. Reznor, who owns this song (“Where is Everybody”). Um…I don’t know…they’re not here, I know that much!

Love Letters at: K_Tenshi@gundamwing.org.

Key: songlines in italics

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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He pushes me under and I obey, He sucks on my lip and I can only gasp. He dominates every little movement I could think of, and he guesses before I can move. I budge and I squirm, but he only holds on tighter, harder, closer. With his thumb in my mouth, he breaks my bind and enters my mouth with his tongue, dancing, conquering in a raw and violent attack. The rumbling of the sheets is the loudest thing I can hear. The sound of his moans are the sweetest notes in my ear. My heart is racing, God, why is this happening? Why am I letting this happen again?

The color of the room turns to black and I am left floating in a sea of rage.  Another kiss, another invasion, another submission. Just hold me.

 

Just touch me.

 

Just stop it! Godammit, STOP IT!

 

I can’t breathe.

 

I can’t think.

 

I can’t see.

 

I can’t see you.

 

Through my eyes I see myself. You destroyed me, you took me inside of you. Now I am nothing, just a vessel that I can see myself destroying with your hands. Your raw, harsh hands. Molding me into a slave. Into a whore. And now you dig your hands into my chest, pinching, scratching, drawing my blood. Trying to make me happy. Please. I will show you what it means to be happy, Heero Yuy.

 

Did you happen to catch

or did it happen so fast

what you thought would always last

has passed you by

 

I turn him around, placing myself on top of him. His eyes jump wildly, trying to figure out how I freed myself from his almost perfect lock. No. You don’t. I will give you back the happiness you gave me. Drop by drop.

 

is everything speeding up

or am I slowing down

I’m just spinning around

and I don't know why

 

 

He struggles, but I give him blow to the head, and he slows down. I turn him on his stomach, and carefully tie his hands to the bedpost. I grin. Heero, this is what you’ve become. The sweetness of your blood will return to your mouth. The stinging of my tears will dampen your eyes. The raging war in my heart will destroy yours. Isn’t this love, Heero? Isn’t it?

 

All the pieces don't fit

though I didn't really give a shit

I never wanted to be like you

 

I stand up and collecting all my might, I give him a kick on his side, making him cough loudly. I stomp on him, once, twice, over and over until I’m jumping on top of him as if he were the bed. He’s coughing up blood before long. I grin, moving closer to his ear, nibbling, biting, sucking, whispering. This is you, Heero. This is you fucking you over.

 

“No. Stop. No. Duo…”

 

Say it again, as I break your neck in half, pulling your hair out of your scalp.

 

“NO! DUO! STOP! NO!”

 

But for all I aspire

I am really a liar

and I’m running out of things I can do

 

I pull my nose to his back. Hmmm…you smell so good, Heero. You smell like blood. My blood. My life, that you drew out of me. And now, you lay under me. You cry under me. You die under me.

 

 

I’d like to stay

but every day

everything pushes me farther away

if you could show

help me to know

how it's supposed to be

where did it go?

 

 

I bite, he moans. I scratch, he groans. I pull and I tug, and he cries over again. I press my chest drenched with sweat on top of him, out juices mixing, bathing us in a sea of salt and blood. I lick his shoulder, playfully first, a bit more daring afterwards. His breathing is raged, which excites me more, because it’s a delicious mixture of fear and desire. My eyes flicker and I bite in, hard. He screams out, and I pull out a chunk of flesh, my lips red and sticky. I lick them, savoring their metallic-like taste, feeling like honey to me. Ah, Heero…Hee-chan. This is the pleasure that you so generously provided for so long. My face is wet from the sweat, and with a soft chuckle, I let is drip into his wound, receiving a wondrous cry in reply.

 

“GOD, DUO, YOU’RE INSANE!! STOP IT!!”

 

Say it again, bastard. I grab his neck and apply pressure.

 

“God”

 

“No”

 

“Please”

 

“Stop”

 

Pleading and

needing and

bleeding and

breeding and

feeding

exceeding

Where is everybody?

trying and

lying

defying

denying

crying and

dying

Where is everybody?

 

Yeah Heero, where is everybody? Because no one can save you now.

 

I lift his hips, and inmediatly he starts whimpering. It’s not loud, but I can still hear him. Barely. I can only hear my breathing right now. Breathe in. Breathe out. Breathe in. Breathe out. Out. In, Out, In. That’s what you want, right? That’s what makes you happy. Don’t; worry love, I will make you happy. Positioning his hips against mine, I look across from me, at his lovely back, arched in pain and longing, and I get a rushing desire to make that spine break in ecstasy.

 

Well okay, enough.

you've had your fun

but come on there has got to be someone

hasn't yet become

so numb

and succumb

 

“Heero!! HEERO! CAN YOU HEAR ME?!” I yell out. He struggles to talk, but the mind-breaking pain of my sudden entrance silences his words. I budge in closer, and we are completely joined. I feel something land on my head and I look up, to see dozens of flower petals falling from the ceiling on to us. The bed is a sea, the waves crashing onto us. The sight of white and red on the sheets just excites me more. More. I thrust in more. Again, and again and again…It rolls in my mind. Let’s stop pretending. This isn’t a fucking joke. Heero, this is the truth.

 

And

Goddamn I am so tired of pretending

wishing I was ending

when all I’m really doing is trying to hide

and keep it inside

fill it with lies

open my eyes?

maybe I wish I could try

 

“DUO!!! DUO!! NO!!! STOOOOPPP!!!  NO, I want MORE. MORE. I’ve never had anything, Heero don’t take it away from me. You owe me, you owe me this! I thrust harder and harder, deeper and deeper. I dive as if I want to find his soul. Our hips joined in perfect rhythm. Our cries in perfect harmony.  I can see his swollen erection, pleading for release. Hell, his entire body is pleading for release. I grin. It hurts doesn’t it? Life, it hurts. No one ever gave me anything, they just took and took. I had to take too. I had to take before I had nothing more. All of them, I will give them what they deserve.

 

“Save…me..” I hear it escape from his lips.

 

“Save you? Who’s going to save you?! The people YOU saved? You think anyone gives a damn about you?! About any of us?! Tell me Heero! Where are they?! The ever so grateful souls you saved, who should come for your rescue?!!!”

 

Pleading and

needing and

bleeding and

breeding

feeding

exceeding

Where is everybody?

trying and

lying

defying

denying

crying and

dying

 

 

 

“TELL ME!!”

 

WHERE IS EVERYBODY?!!

 

“Ahhh…” he gasps. The pain muffles his voice, his throat is hoarse from all the yelling. I see clear droplets fall to the mattress, and I realize they are tears. I can feel him pressing agaisnt me, in a steady motion. He wants me to go on. He knows he likes it. I gasp, trying to catch my breath, my hands drop to his sides and hold him close to me. I use his hips to thrust even more. A chorus of crying and moaning elevates us as we approach our sanctuary. Our eternal dance draws to an end, and I turn my gaze to the ceiling, closing my eyes. I can still see. I see small little flicks of gold and blue. Little light fairies, which dance all around us. We are but a single body, soul, in the height of its misery and enlightment.

 

Pleading

feeding

bleeding

breeding

feeding

exceeding

Where is everybody?

 

 

Dance, sing, light is all around us. Heero draws his head back and screams my name. My eyes open in shock. The world is suddenly ours. I feel my lungs explode, I’m unable to recognize my voice in the midst of the frantic screams. Our names mix in the air, and finding that perfect instant in the small universe within us, we come, at the exact same time. Every minute, every second, every fraction, exact. Heero sobs into the covers and I fall onto him, melting with the hot fusion of our bodies. Strands of hair obtrude my vision. But all I can see anyway are flicks of gold and blue, dancing in the air, singing the song to our eternal dance. Under, over, from what I’ve learned its all the same. It doesn’t really matter when you’re the same person. I open my eyes and I find myself lying next to him, his fingers running through my hair. I guess he finally decided to free himself from my bindings. I’ve never been good at tying knots.

 

Trying

lying

defying

denying

crying and

dying

Where is everybody?

 

 As we lay together in our messy universe, we decide we don’t really care.

 

 

END.

 

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Author’s notes: I have NO idea why I wrote this, I was just listening innocently to my NIN CD, I heard the song, images popped up in my head and voila! It’s unlike me to write rape stuff, but like I said, the muse took over me, I couldn’t do anything! Oh I feel so violated…;_;

I still like it. I kind of like the psychotic Duo and Heero. As long as they still love each other, that’s all that matters. Oh well…

 

-Kuroi Tenshi =:)

 

The Full Disclaimer

Shin Kidousenki Gundam Wing is trademark and property of Sunrise, Bandai, Sotsu Agency, and associated companies. The characters are used without permission for entertainment purposes and of completely no profit at all. Original portions of this work belong to the author.